Harry Potter and the Unwanted Marriage Contract
by anorc
Summary: HP A marriage contract story with a difference. The sequel to my crackfic Harry Potter and the Method of Double-tap. Go read that first. This story takes place after Harry Potter and the Goblet of fire; and if you don't read the prequel, nothing will make less sense… Or more sense. Or something. This is fanfic. Trigger warnings apparently: bits are grim. HAPHNE
1. Chapter 1

**Harry Potter and the Unwanted Marriage Contract**

HP AU ? HP and DG.

A Marriage contract story with a difference.

AN: Not a happy story. Some bad language. Harry makes jokes about killing himself.

AN: The sequel to my crackfic Harry Potter and the Method of Double-tap. Go read that first.

This story takes place after Harry Potter and the Goblet of fire; and if you don't read the prequel, nothing will make less sense… Or more sense. Or something. This is fanfic.

AN: If you want a crack version of this, it's available too. This version's all angsty. Harry's a canonically moody little bugger, and I felt like writing it this way.

_If you weren't reading… Harry's killed Peter Pettigrew, somewhat vanquished Voldemort in the graveyard with a lot of help from Cedric Diggory, killed the fake Mad-Eye moody, been freed forever from Dursleys by a freed Sirius Black, handed back the gun Sirius gave him, then avoided death by accidental arranged marriage to Delphini Riddle, and gone home to Grimmauld place._

_Harry's betrothal contract with Delphini Riddle showed up as an extra face on the magical family tree with a line linking Delphini Riddle to Harry. There were of course lines up the family tree showing her parentage. Tom Riddle finally made into a real pure-blood family tree. Briefly._

_Thanks to JK Rowling and her publishers etc.. for allowing fanfic._

_Revised because my best friend pointed out Nymphadora Tonks is the nearest thing to Harry's adopted big cousin._

* * *

**Grimmauld place, kitchen.**

Sirius Black sits down at the kitchen table and admires his leather jacket on the back of the kitchen door.

Harry heads off upstairs.

"Where are you going Harry?" asked Sirius, chasing Harry.

"Just going to check the family tree. Just to be sure." said Harry.

"Fine, my paranoid godson." said Sirius, who liked chasing things.

Harry enters the room with the family tree and heads for his own section.

Harry and Sirius bend down and look at Harry's face on the family tree that covers the walls of the whole room. "Fuck… there's still a girl there linked to my name" said Harry. "I'm still in a marriage contract!"

"Lumos" said Sirius, squatting slowly.

"I still can hardly see.. still a witch D something"

"Lumos" repeated Sirius.

"Who the hell is Daphne Greengrass?" asked Harry. 'And why am I in a marriage contract with her.' he thought

Sirius snorted "The Greengrasses are in the sacred twenty eight and she's born in 1980, like you. She's at Hogwarts with you" said Sirius certainly.

"How do you know all that?" said Harry, noting the year of birth on Daphne's name-rectangle-thingy.

"Harry, there are only twenty eight names in the sacred twenty eight. It's easy." said Sirius.

"Sirius, I solemnly swear, I've never heard of her" said Harry.

Sirius snorted. "Well, she's not a bastard, or a halfblood" said Sirius, tracking upwards. "Her mother's an Abbot."

Silence.  
"Sirius, can I have the gun back, so I can shoot myself?" asked Harry.

"Harry," Sirius squinted at the painting "She looks alright" he said.

"This is not happening" said Harry, shaking his head.

"Harry, you probably don't have to marry her" said Sirius.

"What?"

"We'll find the Potter family rules, I'll un-adopt you, you'll be fine"

"Sirius, that sounds like a load of bull"

"I Was trying to make you feel better" said Sirius.

"So I go from having Voldemort try to kill me, to having to marry some girl I've never met." cried Harry.

"Harry, you've met her, you might not have ever noticed her, or talked to her, but she was at the same sorting as you" said Sirius.

"Well she's not in Griffindor"

"Well of course not"

"What do you mean?"

"The hats tell you the house people were in at Hogwarts" said Sirius.

"But her hat is silver"

"Yeah, well, that explains why you haven't talked to her." said Sirius.

"Huh"

"Harry, look at most of the Blacks. What colour are their hats"

"Umm…. Silver"

"Slytherin" said Sirius.

"I'm dead. A witch from Slytherin, forced to marry me… I'm a dead man" moaned Harry.

"No Harry, you'll just be dead on the inside" said Sirius, cheerfully. "Like all your Black forebears"

...

"Harry, you can talk to snakes, right" asked Sirius

"Yeah"

"Problem solved. Use snake speech on her" said Sirius.

"Asshole" said Harry sulkily.

...

"We need to deal with this, write her family a letter"

"I'm fourteen" cried Harry.

"And you're an adult at seventeen, so you only have three years to get to know her."

-==0==-

**The kitchen, that afternoon **

"Come on Harry, we're going shopping you need clothes that fit."

"You're going to buy me clothes?"

"Well, you're too small for mine, and I'm wearing them"

"Sirius, thanks"

"Don't thank me, this is going to take ages"

-==0==-

**Back at Grimmauld place, later.**

"Sirius, why is your house filthy and full of magical pests"

"Because my mother died and left it for ten years"

"I'm sorry"

"Don't be, she was an horrible woman, who supported Voldemort"

"I'm sorry it's disgusting." explained Harry.

"Well, we could hire some cleaners, I suppose" said Sirius.

"Sirius, I'm really upset about the marriage contract stuff"

"It is awful, but we're Blacks. Show some stiff upper lip."

"I'm fourteen and forced to marry Sirius, I'm very sad" said Harry.

"And I know about the contracts the Black family uses Harry, I'll do all I can to help you."

-==0==-

**The Leaky Cauldron, the back room.**

Sirius and Harry walk in, the door is marked "Private function"

There's a family sitting, waiting.

Harry sees a Blonde mother, a blonde daughter… That must be Daphne. She has blue eyes, and an angry face.

"Lord Black, Mister Potter" says the father, standing up. He's dark haired, like the younger daughter, who seems excited.

"Lord Greengrass" says Sirius, nodding.

"My wife Salome" she nods.

"My daughter Daphne," Daphne stares at Harry angrily. 'This is not going well' thought Harry.

"My youngest, Astoria." Astoria seems highly amused and winks.

"I think everyone knows Me, and Harry's more famous than I am" said Sirius.

Lady Greengrass frowns.

Harry tries to do the thing they rehearsed "Lord Greengrass, Lady Greengrass, Daphne, Astoria" he nods to them all.

"Please, call me Gary" says Lord Greengrass.

Astoria titters.

Salome Greengrass elbows her husband "Cyrus , call me Cyrus" says Cyrus.

Harry can't help it, and he snorts. Salome and Daphne and Astoria all look like they've heard Cyrus make a joke like this before, and have ceased to find it funny.

Cyrus waves them down and they sit, opposite the Greengrasses.

"So, our children are caught in a dangling marriage contract" said Cyrus.

"Our second this month" said Sirius.

Astoria snorts. Cyrus looks peeved. Daphne briefly stops glaring long enough to look surprised, then goes back to glaring.

"We heard about that Riddle Girl. Who are they anyway?" asked Cyrus.

Harry coughs "Voldemort's bastard daughter" he says, as plainly as he can.

Salome speaks up "Well, I can see that would have been unacceptable" she says, in a dignified voice.

Daphne looks like she's trying to skin Harry with eye power alone. Great.

Sirius speaks up "So at present, Harry is my Heir, to Black, and Potter as well."

Cyrus blinks. "Both?"

"Well, I don't have a wife or children" said Sirius "But that could change"

Daphne gives Sirius a look that makes Harry think she thinks 'not bloody likely.'

He snorts. Daphne glares at him.

Sirius starts again "Now Harry hasn't met Daphne, even though they're both at Hogwarts."

Daphne mouths 'griffindork' silently.

Harry tries to smile but he's feeling terrified.

"So, I assume that from how they're looking at each other, neither is very happy with the contract" said Sirius.

"Daphne is uh.. " said Cyrus

"Ropeable" said Daphne clearly, in an upper class accent.

Salome smiles thinly, as this is clearly more appropriate language than has been used before.

"Well Harry, did say.. that he thought he was a dead man" said Sirius.

"I'm dead. A witch from Slytherin, forced to marry me… I'm a dead man" said Harry, quoting.

Daphne's face brightened up at this admission. Harry noticed that she was actually pretty, when not trying to glare his skin off.

"So, we have a quite standard, unwanted contract. Any exit clauses you can find?" asked Sirius.

"Our lawyers have found it, and it is an old Black contract" said Salome, ominously.

"Oh dear" said Sirius.

"You are familiar with these contracts?" asked Cyrus.

"They have turned up in family discussions" said Sirius and sighed.

"Is there any way out of it?" asked Harry. Daphne looked very pleased at the question.

"Well, if either of them die, the contract goes dangling again, and as you have two daughters..." said Sirius.

Astoria, who'd been looking fairly amused, suddenly looked horrified.

"And if Harry dies?"

"My next male heir, probably. The age range allowed in Black contracts is thirty years, with marriage at seventeen"

Both the Greengrass girls looked at Sirius murderously.

"And if either party murders the other, the contract will probably kill the other." said Sirius.

Daphne Greengrass looked very angry. "Father!" she spat.

"Dear, our lawyer is in hospital from trying to read the contract" said Cyrus gently.

"Oh yes, can't be read by uninterested parties." said Sirius offhandedly.

"You seem well informed about these contracts" said Salome.

"Well, my cousin Bellatrix had one with Rudolphus LeStrange." said Sirius.

"Bellatrix LeStrange was contracted onto ..." said Daphne Greengrass, looking disgusted.

"Yeah, Bella didn't take well to the contract, and then, well, she went mad." said Sirius

"What?" cried Cyrus.

"If they don't both say I do, and mean it, they get cursed, a compliance curse" said Sirius.

"You Beasts put this contract onto my poor Daphne!" cried Salome.

Harry was horrified. "I'm so sorry" he said.

"So If I don't say I do and love that twit, I'm going to get my mind destroyed!" exclaimed Daphne.

"There is a loophole" said Sirius.

"What, How?" asked Cyrus sharply.

"They have to say I do, and mean it. But they can change the vows they take, by mutual agreement."

"That's a hell of a loophole" said Cyrus.

"How much can you change the vows?" asked Daphne.

"Lets take a look" said Sirius.

Cyrus slid a very large, bulging envelope over to Sirius and he pulled out a hefty bundle of very old parchment.

"This is old" said Sirius.

"Problem?" asked Salome.

"Older than I've seen before…. Oh that's not good. Oh that's awkward….. Oh bugger."

Sirius looked up "This contract has some fixed vows."

"What?" asked Cyrus

"Fidelity Loyalty and Domesticity" said Sirius.

"They have to live together, can't fool around and can't make oaths to others." Sirius explained

"Oaths?" asked Salome.

"Yeah, so they won't be saying "Basil, I love you and swear I'll marry you when Potter dies", because that would be breaking a vow, and that's very painful, or fatal." said Sirius.

"You know this contract?"

"I read fast" said Sirius "And summarise well, It got me EE's at Hogwarts."

Harry looks at his godfather and feels a surge of dislike. What a jammy prat.

"Anything else?" asked Cyrus, clearly equally irritated with his dogfather.

"O dear, It's got old-timey pre-marriage clauses." said Sirius, sounding disappointed.

"Pre-marriage?" asked Salome.

"Yeah, uh, fidelity, uh, " Sirius stopped reading. "Look, we can change some of this contract by mutual agreement."

"We can?" said Cyrus

"We can't stop it from being a contract, and we can't make it not a marriage contract, but we can take out the more awful clauses." said Sirius.

"We can?" asked Daphne hopefully.

"We can't get rid of the penalty clauses." said Sirius.

"Crap" said Daphne.

"What she said" said Harry.

"Look, loyalty" said Salome brightly. Daphne looked incredulously at her mother.

"We can take out the er, pre-marriage fidelity clause, and the loyalty clause. We can't take out some of the courting clauses." said Sirius.

"Courting clauses" said Daphne, as if she'd just said "Terminal cancer"

"They have to date a set number of times per month, which is … two , and dine together weekly" said Sirius.

Daphne looked at Harry and mouthed what Harry was pretty sure was 'just kill me.'

"And there its… the gala clause." said Sirius despondently.

"What?" asked Salome.

"At Galas, balls they must be on each others dance cards" said Sirius.

"That doesn't sound so awful" said Salome.

"And if they dance with anyone else, they die." said Sirius. "This is the contract grandmother used to scare the children of the house of Black with."

"You're joking" said Daphne.

"No, I'm always Sirius" said Sirius. "It's a stinker of a clause."

Silence for a while. Even Astoria's looking depressed.

"So hypothetically, If you and Harry were both to die unexpectedly, what would happen ?" asked Daphne.

"Harry's best friend in the entire world, Mad Eye Moody would be very interested."

"Urk" said Daphne.

Harry spoke up "What counts as dining together?" he asked.

Sirius flipped pages "The same room at the same time" he said.

Harry laughed then said "Miss Greengrass, may I have the honour of dining with you at Hogwarts in the great hall, I'll be at the Griffindor table, you'll be at Slytherin"

Daphne looked amused "That sounds delightful. Why let us dine there up to three times a day."

Salome laughed. She had a very pretty laugh, though Harry.

"So what counts as a date?" asked Harry.

Sirius flipped backward and forwards "Er, that's harder, they have to be in close proximity, interact and be seen."

"Hmm. Potions?" said Harry.

"No way. You're hopeless, and I'm only getting A's as it is"

"Walks to the black lake?" asked Harry

"Ugh."

"Well, Hogsmeade's right out" said Harry.

"Social death" said Daphne and they nodded in unison.

"Er, if you skip the courting clause… it's … you'll get sick and have to touch." said Sirius.

"Potions?" asked Harry again.

"How close do we have to be?"

"Arms length" said Sirius.

"What if we went for a run in the morning" asked Harry.

"Social suicide." said Daphne

"What if we were in a larger group… a running club" said Harry.

"That could work" said Sirius, reading frantically, after fifteen minutes, he sighed "That will work."

"I'm not that keen on running" said Daphne.

"Well, something" said Harry.

"Choir?" asked Daphne.

"Can't sing." said Harry.

"Gobstones?" said Daphne.

"Okay, that's doable" said Harry.

"Can you two get that close at Gobstones club without social death?" asked Astoria.

"Er, that's a point" said Daphne "I'm second seed this year".

"You'd best get some muggle running shoes and clothes" said Harry.

"Ugh!" said Daphne.

"Um Daphne, do you like to dance?" asked Harry.

"Not particularly..." she replied.

"Well, we jut don't dance" said Harry. "Gala clause averted."

"But if I do?" asked Daphne.

"Lets burn the bridge when we come to it" said Sirius.

"This is important. My daughter could Die!" said Cyrus.

"Look they just have to … the old lost bet gambit" said Sirius smiling to himself.

"The what?" asked Salome.

"You claim that as part of some stupid bet, you lost a bet and end up having to dance with someone you detest, in this case, Daphne with Harry."

"Nobody would believe it" said Daphne.

"Carry parchment with the forfeit written out on it." said Sirius.

"No-one would believe that" said Astoria.

"My cousin used it to dance with her muggle-born boyfriend for years. Till she eloped" said Sirius, and blinked at them all. Harry decided he needed to meet THIS auntie. She seemed clever.

"You need to do some groundwork, make sure everyone knows they dislike each other" said Sirius.

Daphne snorted "That's trivial"

"A teensy bit dangerous, we need to strike the loyalty and fidelity pre-marriage clauses before its safe to say for example 'I detest Harry potter and dancing with him would be the worst forfeit ever.'" said Sirius.

"What ever would anyone use as lost bets?" said Salome.

"Quidditch matches?" asked Harry.

"Honestly, if you're playing, and there aren't Dementors, you're going to win" said Daphne.

"Pleased you appreciate me" said Harry, nodding.

"Children, be nice, we need to vary the contract before you can safely be obnoxious to each other" said Salome.

"Well at least I don't have to kiss him" said Daphne.

Sirius nodded "That would only be in a really old contract."

"Isn't this one really old?" said Cyrus nervously.

Sirius flicked through it "Here we go… courting clauses… no no no No specific kissing clause."

"Whew" said Astoria.

Daphne snorted.

"Daphne, have I told you how much I love you and want you to be healthy" said Astoria.

Daphne rolled her eyes. Harry laughed.

Sirius was running his finger down the pages and he stopped and snorted. "Oh, that's awkward."

"Awkward"

"There's a, er intimacy clause in the courting clauses." said Sirius glumly.

"Not..." Cyrus trailed off.

"No.. but they've got to swap spit. They've got to hold one another... and laugh." said Sirius.

"Laugh?" said a horrified Salome.

"They have to make each other laugh" explained Sirius.

"Well I can just look at the boy who dorked. I'll laugh" said Daphne.

Harry sighed.

"What's the penalty on that?" asked Cyrus.

"Oh… um , oh that's very creative.. I'd be proud of that myself." said Sirius.

"What?" asked Salome.

"If Harry doesn't make Daphne laugh, she won't taste sweet, and vice versa" said Sirius.

Cyrus snorted "They are the sweetness of each other lives." The adults chortled.

"Can you lot stop laughing at my imminent loss of a taste bud" said Harry angrily.

Daphne looked apoplectic "No sweets!"

"The courting clauses don't kick in till you're fifteen" said Sirius.

"Which of us?" asked Harry.

"Either" said Sirius, not looking up from the parchment.

"July 31" said Harry.

"May 12" said Daphne.

"Thanks Daphne, I'm sure" said Harry.

"What about love potions" asked Astoria, rubbing her hands together.

"What?" asked Sirius

"Well, they can take a love potion, do disgusting things, and not hate themselves, and do it again two weeks later." said Astoria.

"A mild love potion" said Salome.

"Amortentia would be right out" said Cyrus.

"Well, really, would it?" asked Sirius.

"What's Amortentia?" asked Harry.

"The most powerful love potion there is" said Cyrus.

"Why the hell would we want to use that?" asked Daphne.

"Because the required dose would be tiny" said Sirius, "And you'd easily comply with all the courting clauses"

"They'd be all over each other. I'm not having that" said Salome.

"Not with a tiny dose." said Sirius thoughtfully.

Daphne and Harry looked thankful.

Sirius sighed "Okay a tiny dose. What do you two think?" he asked.

Harry looked at Daphne, who shrugged "There's no way I'm kissing him voluntarily." she said.

"Oh shit!" said Sirius "Quick, get a quill and change the pre-marriage clauses, taking out the fidelity clause" he cried.

"Why" asked Cyrus.

"Because Daphne just swore an oath to not kiss Harry voluntarily." said Sirius.

"Oh… shit, a quill" cried Cyrus.

The parents found the section, and crossed out the fidelity clause and Sirius and Cyrus initialled it.

"Harry, hold Daphne's hand for about twenty minutes" said Sirius.

"Why?"

"Because otherwise she'll be sick till you do, she violated the now removed fidelity pre-marriage clause"

"Now that they're holding hands, we can get rid of the pre-marriage loyalty clause too" said Sirius.

Sirius found that section, and crossed out the fidelity clause and Sirius and Cyrus initialled it.

"Okay kids you can be obnoxious to each other" said Salome.

"Later" said Daphne.

"I'm never going to like treacle tart ever again" moaned Harry.

Daphne looked dismissive. "Hey Potter, what do you call a man with no brain?" asked Daphne.

"I dunno Daphne, what do you call a man with no brain?" asked Harry.

"Your godfather." she said.

Harry chuckled. Maybe treacle tart wasn't going off the menu.

Harry looked at her face and thought, one day, I''ll be married to her. It made a tiny part of his heart warmer, in a cold sort of way.

"So the funny thing about Amortentia, is it smells different to everyone" said Cyrus.

Daphne,Astoria and Harry were all surprised.

"Although it's a love potion, if you smell it, you smell your actual love."

"What?" said Harry.

"So if I smell it, I smell you mother's perfume" said Cyrus. Salome held Cyrus's hand.

Astoria mimed vomiting.

Harry chuckled.

"Well, now we can let the children discuss things more freely" said Cyrus.

"He's a moronic half blood" said Daphne. "My life is ruined"

"I'd never met her" said Harry "But at least I know she hates me, and my life ends on my seventeenth birthday"

"My Fifteenth" said Daphne. "After that I have to kiss you, you reject"

Cyrus took a deep breath "Well, this is, not great." he said, sounding very depressed.

Sirius nodded "My cousin screamed all the way to altar. Of course, then she screamed afterwards, but that was because she went insane. Not that she was ever all there to start with..." said Sirius.

Harry and Daphne swallowed and looked pale.

"We need to change the vows" said Harry.

The removable vows were removed.

"So that's what we have to say" said Daphne, reading the page.

"Not for three years" said Harry.

"I hate you" said Daphne.

"I'm sorry this happened" said Harry. "My life's been rubbish, but I'm sorry you're dragged into it"

Daphne looked surprised "You really are sorry, aren't you?" she asked.

"Well of course" said Harry.

Sirius patted Harry on the back "Well said Harry"

"So Potter, why do you only wear school robes, even on weekends?" asked Daphne.

"Harry lived with his Muggle aunt and uncle until I was freed. They didn't like him, and gave him nothing but hand-me-down clothes. So he hasn't been spoiled" said Sirius

Daphne looked from Sirius to Harry and back "But Dumbledore..."

"Isn't exactly our favourite person" said Harry darkly.

-==0==-

**Harry has a perfectly nice time on the Hogwarts express.**

Hermione and Ron are pleased to see him, he catches up with Seamus and Dean, and enjoys some sweets and exploding snap with his best friends.

Eventually Hermione descends into a book and Ron and Harry play some more snap.

Harry reaches into his pocket and finds a piece of cardboard. He takes it out and reads it 'Running club.'

"Oh yeah, I'm thinking of starting a running club at Hogwarts, we'll go for a run first thing" said Harry.

"Seems a bit… early for that" said Ron.

"That seems like a great idea Harry, physical fitness is very important" says Hermione.

"You joining, Hermione?"

"I, um… Okay" she says.

"Cool, I'll put some signs up around school tomorrow" said Harry.

"Harry, are you going to make it an open club?" asked Hermione.

"Well, why not. School unity and all that" said Harry.

Draco Malfoy turns up for his annual on-train bullying attempt.

"You're back, you stinky glory thief" says Draco Malfoy.

"Sorry Draco, yes I am" says Harry, looking back at his card game.

"You can't just ignore me!" says Draco.

"Draco, I had two adults try to kill me last year. A bit of verbal abuse from the Heir to the Malfoy name, really, you're not so bad" says Harry.

Draco doesn't know quite what to think at this statement.

"You'll get yours" says Draco.

"Draco, as you may have heard, I got captured by a dangling Black marriage contract. So my life is already ruined, and there's a special witch who wants me to die of natural causes before her fifteenth birthday. Really, you're going to hex me painfully and call me names. Big deal."

Hermione and Ron look at Harry incredulously.

"Do neither of you read the paper" Harry said.

"I thought you got out of the contract with that Delphini girl" said Hermione.

"She was never a threat. She's a bastard daughter of a halfblood, so Sirius tore up the contract"

Draco Malfoy's mouth opened and shut.

Ron looked up at Draco "I think you broke him, Harry"

"Marriage contracts are a barbaric" said Hermione.

"Yes they are" said Harry. "And involuntary for everyone in my case"

Draco Malfoy left, looking at Harry briefly, with a look of, was that pity?.

-==0==-

Term starts with the surprise announcement that Professor Moody is back for a second year "I wasn't here last year, that was a Death eater polyjuiced as me" says Moody in his introductory speech. By Hogwarts standards, a pretty upbeat start to the year.

Harry is surprised, when after the announcements, a group of students led by Professor Flitwick go up to the platform high table sits on and form three rows.

Harry avoids looking at a certain Slytherin, who is in the back row.

The ones in the front row are holding toads, and some more students are holding musical instruments.

They start to play a boppy tune, and then the group sings. It's a witchey song, about bubbling cauldrons and trouble, and rather catchy, and Harry enjoys it.

Judging by the applause, so does most of the school.

After the singers depart back to their tables, Professor Moody winked at him from the high table.

"Harry, are you really stuck in another marriage contract" asked Hermione, after the first course.

"Yes, mother" said Harry.

"Who is it?" she asked.

"I'm not saying. We don't know each other, don't like each other and we have to get married. We have three years left, then..." said Harry.

"Blimey" said Ron "You have the worst luck Harry"

"There has to be some way out of the contract, maybe I can research it and help" said Hermione.

"Hermione, listen carefully. The contract is cursed , and if you read it, you'd end up in St Mungos."

Hermione looked horrified. "That's awful"

"Not as bad as having to marry someone you don't love" said Ron.

Hermione gave Ron a look that seemed oddly approving. Harry resolved to remember the time when Ron said something Hermione approved of fully. He suspected it might not happen again soon.

Harry took a poster for the running club to Professor McGonagall during her office hours and she enthusiastically approved.

"Harry, this is very good. I will see that this notice gets put on every noticeboard. If you keep this sort of behaviour up, you might be made Prefect next year." she said.

Harry wasn't sure being prefect was compatible with sneaking round having adventures, but maybe this year would be quieter.

-==0==-

The first Thursday saw the running club's first meeting, in the front hall, at eight.

Harry tightened his running shoe's laces and looked out the narrow window at the day. It was typical Scottish weather, and summer was ending. Harry zipped up his windbreaker.

Hermione stood nervously, in a tracksuit and trainers. "I hope I don't get stitch" she said.

After a while, students appeared, some wearing muggle running gear, others in what Harry assumed were wizarding exercise robes.

After his new watch said it was ten past, Harry spoke up "Okay, it's time to start off. We're running down to the lake, round once and back. We'll be going easily, and it's okay for people new to running to go slow."

"Who made you the boss of this club?"

"I started it, but if someone else want to organise it, please, feel free" said Harry, turning back to the group. "Come on. Lets run."

Harry ignored the grumbles and set off slowly down the hill. He tried not to look out for a certain blonde Slytherin. He figured he'd go slowly, end up in the new runners bunch and accidentally run with her.

A group of seventh years blew past Harry laughing. Harry thought they were the Hufflepuff Quidditch beaters maybe.

Someone fell in beside him and jogged along. "Hi Hermione" said Harry, then looked over. It wasn't Hermione. It was Daphne Greengrass, in a neat green tracksuit with silver piping. "Potter" she said.

"Greengrass" he said.

"Did you have to start it on the first week back" she complained.

"We only have till your birthday to make this a routine" he replied.

"Daphne" said Hermione, pulling alongside. Hermione must have been doing some exercise, because she wasn't puffing that badly. Then again, neither was Daphne.

"Granger" said Daphne, like she knew Hermione.

"You know Greengrass?" asked Harry, pushing his luck.

"Runes" said Hermione.

"Arithmancy" said Daphne.

"Some of us take subject that aren't easy O's" said Hermione.

Daphne snorted.

"Did he really" asked Daphne.

"He got the idea from Ron." said Hermione.

"Dunderheads" said Daphne, in a very Snape-like tone.

Hermione laughed.

After getting a quarter of the way around the lake, Harry felt warmed up and was disturbed to hear one of the sixth year boys, who were tailing the sixth year girls, Harry noticed, say "Potter starts the club and can't even run."

Harry thought 'Right, that's enough,' took deeper breaths and started to really run. Like in the bad old days of Harry hunting. He shot past the sixth year groups, noticing that the girls were really um, developed and carried on around the lake. He picked up his pace and started to get hot, so unzipped his windbreaker, and tied it around his waist. Feeling the run, he kept running, and when he got to the path back to Hogwarts, continued for another lap.

He caught up to the slow moving group of learners as they nearly reached the path back to Hogwarts, and though he was getting sweaty and starting to tire out, he kept running up the path.

"Bloody showoff" said someone loudly behind him.

Harry was slowing down to cool down by the time he got to the entrance hall. He stood, panting, hands on bent knees feeling more alive than he had in ages.

Some of the faster runners were hanging around the hall

"Pooped from one lap Potter, you're not much of a runner" said a young man in an open tracksuit; Harry thought he was a Ravenclaw maybe.

"Two laps" he panted.

The Ravenclaw? looked green at this and wandered off.

"Two laps eh?" said one of the, must be seventh years "Think we'll have a group for real runners"

"I'll keep pace with the slow ones" said Harry, panting "Give them help"

"You noble little squirt" said the Seventh year "Pembroke Beedle, no relation, Head boy." Pembroke held out his hand.

Harry stood up straight, and shook Pembroke's hand. "Sorry I'm sweaty" said Harry.

"Good work starting the club. Keep up the good work" said Pembroke and sauntered off.

Harry stayed, tired and sweaty in the entrance hall until the slowest of the students he'd lapped came in.

"Harry!" said Hermione, sweaty in her tracksuit "You did two laps, you showoff"

"I just wanted to run" said Harry.

Daphne Greengrass walked past on the way to the dungeons, sweaty and tired and looked at Harry like she wanted him dead. Because she did.

-==0==-

Professor Moody held Harry back after class.

He spelled the door shut and then asked "Potter, Where's your gun?"

"In storage. I figure with Voldemort contained, I'm a lot safer, and the gun is hard to hide, and if someone found it..." said Harry.

"Yes, that would be a problem. You're going to practice fighting with a magic instead, twice a week. After dinner."

"I have quidditch practice on Tuesdays and Thursdays"

"So Mondays and Wednesdays it is, my office. Eight pm. Sharp"

Harry nodded "Thanks Professor"

"Are you really cursed by a marriage contract Potter?" asked Professor Moody.

"Yes sir."

"Well, who is it?" asked Professor Moody.

"Daphne Greengrass, Slytherin"

"huh, you could do worse" said Professor Moody.

"The first one was Voldemort's daughter!" cried Harry.

"Well, that was pretty unlucky, but you got out, and I caught wee miss Riddle."

"What !"

"Well, lets just say the apple doesn't fall far from the tree" said the Professor.

"So she was evil?"

"Like a miniature Bellatrix LeStrange"

"Er, that's my aunt, and I think it was the marriage contract that drove her mad" said Harry.

"Huh, you didn't arrest her at Hogsmeade like I did for fighting. She was a mean, angry young woman" said Professor Moody.

Harry's testicles tried to retract spontaneously into his body.

"Don't you worry. Every few generations someone gets caught by a dangling contract. They do fine" said Professor Moody.

"She hates me" said Harry.

"So what. You're not going to get lovey hugs and kisses. She'll be on your side, guarding your back." said Professor Moody

"Hardly romantic is it?" said Harry.

"Romance, pish. If you took her out to dinner at a nice restaurant, and chatted you couldn't tell the difference" said Professor Moody

"But feelings" said Harry, angstily.

"You're fourteen. You'll get feelings alright. And then you'll get older, and get over them. At least your beat Voldemort. You only have to worry about the usual suspects now."

"Can I go now?" asked Harry.

"Sure you can, you poor wee boy" laughed Professor Moody.

Telling Professor Moody about the whole Greengrass situation was looking less and less like a good idea.

-==0==-

Harry took the train back to London at Christmas.

Hermione sat opposite him, wearing a woolly jumper with a snowflake a pattern and reading.

Ron had found the lure of the castle over Christmas, and infinite food, irresistible. All the Weasleys were staying, so Harry surmised that the Weasley parents might want to get value for money from their education.

After an hour on the train, Hermione looked up, cast a locking charm on the door and said

"So who is she?"

"Who is who, Hermione?" asked Harry.

"The witch you're contracted to"

"Can we not do this" said Harry. "I don't like her, she hates me, we can't get out of it."

"Harry?"

"What, Hermione?"

"Is there another witch you'd rather be with?" she asked.

"Not really" said Harry.

Hermione's eyes did a … thing.

"I still like you Hermione, you're my best friend" said Harry.

"Best friend?"

"Well, Ron's my best mate, but he's not my best friend" said Harry.

"I'm you're best friend?" asked Hermione.

Of course Hermione. You're like the sister I never had" said Harry sincerely.

Hermione gave Harry a watery smile and raised her book.

He didn't hear anything out of her all the way to Kings Cross. 'Must be a good book' he thought.

-==0==-

Kings cross, Platform 9 3/4

Sirius grabbed him, hugged him and said "Come on, Christmas shopping to do"

"What" asked Harry

"Well you need to buy Miss Greengrass something, and I need to buy her family something."

"I suppose so"

"You suppose so. We're going there for Christmas lunch"

Harry's heart fell "Not with her..."

"Oh you two will get over it" said Sirius. "Once the snogging starts, you'll soon both be gagging for it."

-==0==-

Christmas dinner was awkward.

Sirius and Harry sat at one end of the table, and Daphne was forced to sit next to Harry.

"Greengrass"

"Potter"

After dinner, they exchanged gifts.

Daphne had got him a wand holster… which was actually a great present, come to think of it.

"Thank you, this is great" said Harry honestly.

Harry felt terrible, because he'd only got Daphne a box of chocolates and a book on runes.

She opened the parcel and looked surprised. "Chocolates from DeThierry's and Strowager's On exchange runes"

"I'm sorry" said Harry.

Daphne looked up "This is a… great gift ...Harry" she said, straining over saying Harry.

She settled down on the couch with the chocolates and swatted Astoria's had when she tried to take one. "These are from DeThierry's, and they are mine. Get your own"

Harry retreated to Sirius, who was watching , looking amused "Sirius, why didn't we just get Honeydukes"

"Because DeThierry's are a fancy french brand, and your Daphne clearly appreciates them"

Daphne was currently nibbling a chocolate, while reading the book on runes.

"You set me up"

"Harry, you can give a girlfriend Honeydukes, keep it in the cupboard, but to really impress a witch, you pull out the stops and buy something more exclusive. Though as you'll never have an ordinary girlfriend, you can skip the whole Honeydukes thing."

"No he can't" said Daphne loudly "I expect to be supplied with essentials, like Honeydukes and sugar quills"

"Good thing you can go to Hogsmeade to stock up" said Sirius, winking at Harry. Harry rolled his eyes.

"What is it with witches and Sugar quills" said Harry.

"Harry, don't wonder. Just supply your betrothed and bask in her love" said Sirius.

Daphne stared at Sirius, and Harry wondered again when she would master magically skinning by glaring. Fairly soon, he guessed.

Harry got dragged off by Astoria for a chat

"So, what do you like?"

"Flying, quidditch, um… exploding snap, exploring the castle." said Harry.

"Well Daphne likes hating you, telling mother and father how much she hates the contract, and you, and some other boring things, like horse riding, Gobstones, choir."

"Gobstones" said Harry incredulously.

"She's very competitive" said Astoria. "Won't stop till she's won."

"uhuh. The choir thing was very good"

"She's been in it since first year. Some years they put on actual performances in the great hall". They're doing one this year, she's been talking about it"

"When is it" asked Harry.

"June" said Astoria.

"Oh" said Harry despondently.

"What?" asked Astoria.

"After her birthday" explained Harry.

"You'd better get her something good for her birthday, especially as she has to kiss you after that"

"That's why, oh."

"Are you two really gong to use the love potion?

"It's that or hex one another" said Harry.

-==0==-

Daphne approached Harry near the end of the visit.

"Potter, we need to organise a way to meet"

"uh, yeah" said Harry.

"Well, do you have an idea?"

"Go to a abandoned classroom and wait there, I'll turn up" said Harry.

"How would you know that?" she asked.

"I just… look I have a magical map of Hogwarts I inherited from my father. It shows everyone, so I if I see you in an abandoned classroom, I'll come."

"People will see you coming"

"No they won't, I have a cloak of invisibility from my father."

"Nonsense, your invisibility cloak would be worn out by now."

Harry pulled the cloak out of his robe pocket and pulled it on.

"That's amazing" said Daphne with wonder, as Harry wasn't there.

"Now if you can wear that all the time we're married, that would be good" she said.

Harry took off the cloak and put it away.

"Now you can't tell anyone about the map or the cloak" said Harry.

"Of course, family magic" said Daphne, matter-of-factly.

"Your classroom idea is usable but flawed. We really need some way of sending a message to meet up" she said.

"We could use owls" said Harry.

"Please, your owl is very beautiful, but rather distinctive."

"Hedgwig. Her name is Hedgwig." said Harry.

Daphne smirked "The other woman in your life, or rather the other other woman."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you need to let Granger down gently."

"Granger, you mean Hermione?" said Harry, confused. "She was asking me I if had some other witch I fancied other than being contracted to you on the train too."

Daphne's eyes narrowed briefly.

"I told her no." said Harry.

"And how did she take that?"

"It was a bit odd, but I reassured her that she's my best friend, really she's like a sister to me"

Daphne's face blanked. "You said that to her?"

"Well she's been like a sister to me for years. My second friend, really better than Ron"

"Well, I see" said Daphne.

"Then she got all caught up in her book for the rest of the trip" said Harry.

Daphne looked at him oddly, and walked off back to her book and chocolates.

-==0==-

The trip back to school was noisy, with everyone showing off their presents.

Hermione seemed preoccupied with books again.

-==0==-

Harry and Daphne made a habit of running with Hermione in Running club.

Harry ran with Hermione and Daphne ran with Hermione.

A little jostling on corners and they managed to stay within arms length.

-==0==-

A few weeks into term, Harry received a heavy book sized parcel from Sirius.

He took care to open it in his bed, with the curtains closed just in case.

It was a pair of mirrors and a letter.

_'Harry, these are communications mirrors. You hold it, and say the name of the other person, and their mirror heats up. We used to use them to talk between detentions and organise pranks. I think you said you needed a way to contact Daphne and vice versa. The one with a stag on it is called Prongs, and the other one is with the awesome grim is called Padfoot. I was going to keep one, but your need is greater, what with the contract starting to really bite after Daphne's birthday._

_When you get called, the mirror heats up._

_Good luck and enjoy the kissing._

_Sirius_

_'_

It took a day or so, but Harry managed to slip Daphne a note to meet in the second classroom on the third floor after dinner on Saturday.

-==0==-

"Well what?" she asked crossly.

"I've got a way for us to communicate quickly" explained Harry.

Harry explained about the communications mirrors.

"These are very rare" said Daphne.

"Well, if you need me, just call prongs"

'"Why is it prongs"

"Because my Father was an animagus, in the from a a stag. So antlers, so prongs" said Harry.

"He learned to be an animagus while he was at school?" asked Daphne.

"In fifth year, I think" said Harry.

Daphne pocketed the mirror.

"Whats mine called?"

"Padfoot."

"What's it named after"

"Well, Sirius is an animagus, in the form a Grim" said Harry.

Daphne's' eyes grew large "Its… hard to believe"

"Believe it. He licks himself when he's a dog" said Harry.

Daphne snorted then laughed outright . "He doesn't" she said.

"He does. Thinks' nobody notices if he sits in the corner and does it" said Harry.

"Are you joking?" asked Daphne, flushed from laughing.

"Only a little. His friend Moony makes those jokes"

"Moony?"

"Family friend"

"Who can turn into something too?" asked Daphne.

"No, he's just a werewolf" said Harry.

"Oh. Like Professor Lupin"

"Yes" said Harry. "Not all werewolves are evil, and Moony is very careful to take his Wolfsbane potion and lock himself away"

Daphne looked at Harry with narrowed eyes "There's more to all of this isn't there?" she asked.

"Not my secrets to tell. After we're married, with the loyalty clause, you will know all of it." said Harry.

"But you don't trust me" said Daphne.

"I don't know you. How can I trust you when we both hate each other." said Harry.

"We should hate the contract, not each other" suggested Daphne.

"Well, yeah, but we still don't like each other"

"True"

-==0==-

The day after Daphne's birthday, they met in an abandoned classroom.

"So this is it" said Harry nervously.

"Yes"

"Do you want to use the potion" asked Harry.

"No" said Daphne. "I want to get this over and done with, and not..."

Daphne started to cry.

"What's wrong?" asked Harry.

"You're what's wrong. MY first kiss, and it has to be with you, I don't even like you" she cried.

"I'm sorry" said Harry.

"You're always sorry!" said Daphne angrily.

"Well I am, it's not like this is the first kiss I wanted either" said Harry.

"We'll start by hugging." said Daphne with a sigh.

Harry walked right up to Daphne and they hugged awkwardly.

"Now, we ruin our first kiss" said Daphne.

Daphne turned her head sideways a bit and leaned in.

Their lips touched. It felt odd. Daphne smelt of peppermint.

Daphne broke the kiss and sighed "And now we have to swap spit."

Harry felt dubious and it must have showed on his face.

"Oh come on I'm not hideous" said Daphne.

"No, you're very pretty actually" said Harry, unthinkingly.

Daphne startled, pulled away from Harry.

"Are you getting weird?" asked Daphne

"We have to kiss and swap spit. In two years we have to get married. This all weird." said Harry.

Daphne sighed, and leaned forwards.

Harry leaned forward a little and their lips touched. Steeling himself, he stuck out his tongue, and after an awkward moment of pressing his tongue against Daphne's lips, she opened her lips and he got the oddest feeling. After a moment, he pulled his tongue back, and withdrew.

"That was weird" he said.

"You were a typical man. Penetrating the innocent woman" said Daphne.

Harry felt terrible. He went pale. "I'm sorry, I.. um, we … oh bother." he said.

"And if you think I'm doing that you you!" said Daphne.

"Oh you have to next time, it's your turn." said Harry, dropping the loose hug.

"Ew!" explained Daphne.

"There's always the potions" said Harry.

"What, and risk getting up to something with you, not likely." said Daphne.

"It's not that powerful" said Harry. "It's in most potente potions, and the book says ..."

"Would you risk potioning yourself and doing… stuff as a result" asked Daphne.

"Er, no that's gross." said Harry.

"Says the boy that swapped spit."

"I happen to want to taste sweet things" said Harry.

"That's laughing, you have to make me laugh."

"Whats the penalty for the spit than?" asked Harry

"We get sick and have to hold one another to get better"

"Okay… like I said, two weeks, your turn to do the tongue." said Harry, upset.

"Why are you so upset."

"I really like treacle tart" said Harry.

"Not for much longer, besides, Tiramisu's miles better" said Daphne.

"Tira-what"

"It's an Italian desert, made of cream, chocolate, coffee cream cake, all in layers"

"And it's sweet?"

"Well, not soon, mister un-funny" said Daphne.

"Ditto" said Harry.

"I am so funny"

"Prove it"

"What do you call a man with no brain" said Daphne.

Harry snorted.

Daphne put her nose in the air.

Harry started to leave

"What about me?" asked Daphne.

"Well, I don't think you need to be any sweeter, princess" said Harry.

Daphne scowled and drew her wand. Her spell faltered as she cast it.

Acting on instinct, Harry cast a tickling curse on Daphne.

Her wand dropped and she jerked about, snorting, then laughing.

Harry stopped the charm.

"A tickling curse! you hit me with a tickling curse!"

"And you laughed!" said Harry.

"Why you!" she said and hit Harry with a tickling charm.

She left the spell on and Harry, after snorting, laughing, slid down to the floor and rolled uncomfortably. "Take it off" Harry begged, his eyes watering.

Daphne lowered her wand.

"You've worked it out" said Daphne.

"You showed me. Can't curse me, not really, can you"

Daphne tried to cast a stinging hex, and it failed.

"Sit down on the floor" said Harry.

"Why?" asked Daphne

"So I can try a stunner" said Harry simply.

"No I'm not getting my robes dirty sitting on the floor." said Daphne.

Harry pointed his wand at a chair, summoned it closer, and scourgify'd it clean.

"A chair" he said.

Daphne sat down carefully. "And no touching me when I'm out" she said firmly.

Harry gulped "I'd never..." said Harry.

"Good" said Daphne.

Harry shot a stunner at Daphne and she slumped, unconscious.

A quick 'rennervate' and she was awake. "That's quite unpleasant" she said.

"But we know the limitations of the contract. We can't injure each other, but we can stun, and tickle" said Harry.

"If we Ever have to duel in public, you'd better use stunners" said Daphne.

"Understood. But the tickling curse is a neat loophole for the laughing clause" said Harry.

"I'm not so sure it's accidental" muttered Daphne.

"what?" asked Harry.

"Well, I can make you laugh, you just aren't funny." said Daphne blandly.

"My Sirius joke worked." said Harry.

"your dirty joke about your godfather"

"Yes, after all, he turns into a dog, then he goes in the corner and licks his..."

Daphne snorted.

"All our jokes are about your godfather" said Daphne.

"He's larger than life." said Harry.

"What about your dad with "Call me Gary" asked Harry.

Daphne glared at him "That is funny once. He does it over and over again"

Harry snorted, "like Sirius and his "I am Sirius" line.

Daphne frowned

"You ask him if he's joking and he says. "No I'm Sirius'"

Daphne groaned "Not funny"

"Only once, and you've already heard it twice" said Harry.

"I think it's because he's less funny than me, just like you are" said Daphne.

"Less funny than you?" said Harry.

"What do you call a man with no brain?" asked Daphne.

Harry snorted.

"See, I'm naturally funny, you and Sirius are not." said Daphne, smiling.

"It's lucky for you I'm good at the tickling curse then" said Harry, with a tiny grin.

Daphne frowned and left.

-==0==-

**Two weeks later.**

"So, ready?" said Harry.

"Have you cleaned your teeth?"

Harry looked guilty.

"The charm is recens spiritus, just point your wand in your mouth."

Harry casts the spell and it's faintly tingly in his mouth.

He stares pointedly at Daphne.

She huffs and casts the spell.

They advance and hug loosely.

"Remember, you do the tongue" said Harry.

Daphne stand there.

"Hey, the kiss?"

"You're the boy. You lean forwards"

"Oh no. equality in all things. I did it last time, you do it this time."

Daphne blinked at him "Equality in all things?"

"Oh course, how else?" said Harry.

Daphne leaned forwards and kissed Harry, and for a moment, it wasn't weird, then the tongue thing. And the spit, and she leaned back.

Harry let go and stepped back.

"Now, if you could make me laugh, Miss Greengrass." asked Harry.

"What do you call a man with no brain?" asked Daphne.

Harry snorted.

"Like hexing fish in a barrel" she said sourly.

"How's the tiramisu?" asked Harry.

"The elves only make it infrequently" she said.

"So do you need a laugh?" he asked.

"Get on with it" she said crossly. "I had to use three sugars in my tea this morning."

"How do you find an old man in the dark?" asked Harry.

"huh"

"It's not hard" said Harry.

Daphne stared for a second, then went pink and snorted.

"Where did you get that?" she said.

"Dorm. I just asked for someone to tell a joke" said Harry, smiling.

Daphne shook her head. "That was awful"

"Oh, that's a nice joke, Seamus told me a limerick, and it's too dirty to repeat"

Daphne's eyes grew large as saucers.

"I couldn't tell it to a girl" said Harry, blushing

"That bad?" she asked.

"Worse" said Harry.

-==0==-

The year dragged on.

OWLs loomed.

Hermione started to lose it.

Harry found running every morning was good.

He was running along when he looked over and found himself admiring Daphne's running body.

She was getting curves in places. 'Snap out it' he thought., and sped up.

Half term came and all the fifth years stayed at Hogwarts, cramming.

Harry's mirror heated up

He dashed up the stairs from the common room to his dorm and answered "Hi" into the mirror.

Daphne glared at him through the tiny frame "Room 31 on level four. I can't taste sugar, and I feel like I'm coming down with something."

Harry recovered his books and notes and bolted out the portrait hole.

He made good time, the school halls were free of traffic and once he got to the fourth floor he pulled on his cloak.

Daphne was standing in room 31, which had a surprising set of metal benches instead of desks.

"Hello" he said, taking off the cloak.

"A joke. Now!"

"Why do mice have little balls?" Harry asked.

Daphne frowned.

"Because they like to dance" he finished.

She looked at him darkly.

"Why did the widow wear black garters?"

Daphne rolled her eyes.

"In memory of those who had passed beyond" said Harry.

She snorted.

"I broke my finger last week" said Harry.

Daphne shrugged

"On the other hand, I'm okay" he said.

She snorted again. "Your dorm mates are terrible jokers"

"What do you call a pony with a cough?" asked Harry.

She shrugged.

"A little hoarse." said Harry.

She snorted again "Potter, you're sad"

Harry walked over and held her gently. She sighed.

"I'd like a real hug, a real kiss, from a real boyfriend, not you, not because of a cursed contract"

"Well, we don't always get what we want in life Daphne." said Harry, and kissed her gently.

"Hey, you didn't do the spit"

Harry reached up with one hand, held the back of Daphne's head and kissed her firmly, with tongue.

He released her and she stared at him "That was a bit.. much" she said.

"I thought, what would a kiss be like, if it wasn't just a workaround for a curse" said Harry, tearfully.

"Our lives suck" said Daphne.

"How's revision going?" asked Harry.

"Fine" said Daphne.

"So not great then" said Harry.

"Potions is hard to revise" said Daphne.

"Do you really want to do NEWT potions?" asked Harry.

"No." said Daphne

"Then do a good job, and accept that you might not get an E or an O in it."

"When did you suddenly get a grip on life?" asked Daphne.

"I spent my childhood dodging bullies, working like a house elf. Then at Hogwarts, I got attacked every year. That's stopped, but now I'm stuck in the contract with you. When I leave Hogwarts, I can probably live alright, I have a place to live, and enough money for food. Why worry?"

"What about me?" asked Daphne.

"Well, you're only a girl, so you don't eat much..." said Harry, yelping as he got poked in the ribs.

"Seriously, Can you support me?" she asked.

"I've got a vault full of gold and I'm heir to Sirius. I could get a job, I suppose." said Harry.

"You haven't thought about life at all?" asked Daphne.

"I wasn't expecting to have one. He-who-shall-not-be-named kept trying to kill me. The Basilisk alone nearly did."

"Basilisk?"

"Killed one in the Chamber of secrets" said Harry.

"Is it still there?" asked Daphne.

"Probably, only I can open the chamber" said Harry.

"You're the Heir of Slytherin?" asked Daphne, backing away, eyes wide.

"I'm an heir, maybe. Lord you-know-who was in charge of the basilisk." said Harry.

"Basilisk venom is incredibly valuable" said Daphne. "We sell potion ingredients. We can never get Basilisk venom"

"Well, I suppose we could see.." said Harry.

"Now?" asked Daphne.

"Why not, it'll only take an hour or so. We need to take a broom." said Harry.

Harry gave Daphne the cloak and went back to Griffindor tower and got his broom.

When he emerged from the portrait hole, he said softly "You there?"

Daphne replied from behind him "That's Griffindor tower, what a dump" she said dismissively.

Harry laughed and waved his hand "Come on" and led the way to Myrtles bathroom.

"Moaning Myrtles bathroom" said Daphne.

"Yeah the chamber entrance is here" said Harry.

Daphne squeaked when the sink opened. "You… the…."

"Yeah, so now we slide" said Harry.

The Basilisk in the chamber was long, green and dead.

The cool temperatures or perhaps the magical nature of the beast had preserved it.

"It's like it died yesterday" said Daphne.

"Oh this brings back bad memories" said Harry.

"How did you kill it anyway?" she asked.

"I rammed the sword of Godric Griffindor up through it's brain." said Harry.

"How do you do that without getting bitten?"

"I don't know. Phoenix tears heal almost everything." said Harry, wishing he was somewhere else.

Daphne looked at Harry "bullshit"

Harry pulled up his sleeve "See, here's the scar"

"Well how can we get this to my Father?" asked Daphne.

"I've got an idea." said Harry.

"Dobby!" Harry called.

Dobby appeared, wearing a woolly hat and a jersey.

"Master Harry Potter sir, Such a great wizard you are, So glad to see you Dobby is." said Dobby.

"Dobby, can you move this snake to Daphne Greengrasses father"

"Greenygrasses, Dobby knows them" nodded Dobby.

Daphne frowned "Why do you have a Malfoy house-elf?"

Dobby turned and berated Daphne "Dobby is a Free Elf, Dobby works for Hogwarts and gets paid, and works for Mister Harry Potter, and gets paid for that too" said Dobby.

"Dobby, this is Daphne Greengrass. We're engaged, I guess. So one day we'll be married" said Harry.

"Master Harry Potter is so Great. Greenygrass will be Potter one day." said Dobby insanely.

"Yes Dobby but not for a few more years" said Harry.

"Does Great Master Harry Potter want the snake moved now?" asked Dobby.

"If you would, Dobby. Tell Mister Greengrass Harry Potter sends his regards" said Harry.

"Master Harry Potter Sir, It may take Dobby some time to move the snake" admitted the house-elf.

"Take your time Dobby." said Harry gently.

"Well, that's the Chamber of secrets" said Harry.

"Does it have any other secrets?" asked Daphne.

"I don't know." said Harry. "I was in a hurry"

-==0==-

The day after OWLS, Harry was finishing breakfast when an eagle owl dropped off a letter for him.

He picked it up

_'Harry Potter,_

_Dear Harry._

_I was somewhat surprised to find a Dead giant basilisk outside my house._

_The elf said It was Harry Potter sending it, but was a bit incoherent._

_I've got it in a warehouse, and have experts harvesting it._

_It looks like Greengrass Potion ingredients will have Basilisk venom for sale for some time._

_You stand to make a fortune from this. So I'll never bother asking if you can support Daphne._

_Well done._

_Cyrus Greengrass_

_'_

Harry snorted, and looked over at the Slytherin tables. Daphne Greengrass had just finished folding up a letter and putting it in her robes. She glanced in his direction, and smiled crookedly, fleetingly.

-==0==-

Harry and Ron watched Hermione wind tighter and tighter over OWLS.

Harry had found the exams difficult. Running was helping him, and the sight of the sixth and seventh year girls running was doing something for him.

Nothing was left inside him at the end of exams. He just wanted to get on the train and go home.

Hermione kept discussing exam questions obsessively with anyone who didn't flee.

Harry knew he needed to catch up with Daphne again, the Treacle tart was starting to lose it's sweetness again. He went to his bed, closed the curtains and got out the mirror. "Padfoot" he called.

The mirror waited, reflective. Harry waited. After ten minutes, he got out the map and looked for her instead. She was in the Slytherin dorms, in a group of names he recognised as his year.

He called out again "Padfoot". Finally her footprints moved, and went to what he guessed by it's size was a bathroom.

The mirror cleared and he saw Daphne, in a bathroom stall

"What is it Potter" she said crossly.

"I need to see you. I can't taste sugar" said Harry.

"I'm busy. With my friends" said Daphne.

"Oh, I … well , see you later" said Harry.

"Yeah whatever" said Daphne and the mirror went back to being a mirror.

-==0==-

Harry thought about seeing Daphne on the train but discarded the idea. There was no way it would be private enough to tell jokes.

Hermione was reading a book, but fell asleep once the train started moving.

The trip was long, Harry was tired and he dozed off too.

Harry awoke to Ron shaking his shoulder.

"Harry, it's the trolley witch. D'ya want some sweets?" said Ron softly

"Oh Ron, look I don't feel like sweets" said Harry.

Ron waved to to the trolley witch, and she moved to the next compartment.

"Harry, are you feeling alright?" asked Ron.

Harry lay on the seat, feeling the first stages of a bug… but knowing it was just the curse.

"Look Mate, I'll be alright. I think I need some more sleep." he lied.

"Harry, you never pass up sweets on the way home" said Ron 'And you buy your good buddy Ron enough to feed an elephant' thought Harry.

"Well Ron, there's a first time for everything" said Harry and closed his eyes.

Harry awoke and the train had stopped. Hermione was getting her trunk down; probably that or Crookshanks that had woken him.

Next to him, Ron drooled on the bench seat.

Harry sighed and stood up, achingly getting his trunk down.

"Ron, wake up" said Hermione, shaking his shoulder gently.

Harry looked at at friends, and suddenly saw, in the tender look on Hermione's face, love. It was then that Harry realised that Harry, Ron and Hermione was soon going to be Hermione and Ron, with Harry. Harry's heart died a little, he knew that no witch would ever wake him lovingly. He was going to marry Daphne Greengrass, and they cordially disliked one another.

He really was growing up to be a proper pure-blood lord, complete with loveless marriage and wife who hated him. He suddenly felt so incredibly sorry for himself, he burst into tears.

Hermione turned to him and her face showed her shock. Her tired friend had burst into tears, for no obvious reason.

"Harry, what is it?"

"It's.. just, my life. My so called life. I'm never going to kiss a girl I like, feel love" cried Harry.

"Sure you can Harry, lots of birds would go out with you" said Ron.

"Ron, Harry's trapped in one of those old marriage contracts. He and the witch don't like each other" said Hermione.

"Blimey mate, you should have said." said Ron. "I'm sure Hermione and I could work something out. We did all that work for Buckbeak."

"Ron, the contract is cursed, if either of you read it, well, the… their Lawyer ended up in St Mungos"

"Bloody hell!" said Ron. "Are you sure there's no way out"

"Well, if she died, and her sister" said Harry, and regretted saying anything.

Hermione was frowning, trying to work out who it was.

"The contract will bind with up to thirty years age difference" said Harry, trying to muddy the waters a bit.

"Erk" said Ron "You could end up with some really old bird"

"Ron, stop now" said Hermione "You're not helping and Harry doesn't need to be reminded"

"I got so lucky on the first contract" said Harry "Though it was Voldemort's bastard daughter, because she was a bastard and a halfblood, Sirius could just rip up the contract"

Ron paled "I remember you were in the prophet for the ripping up"

"Yeah" said Harry, as Ron got his trunk.

Harry led the way to the exit, trying to give Ron a moment with Hermione.

-==0==-

By the time Harry side-along apparated to Grimmauld place, he was coughing.

"Are you sick Harry?"

"Just the courting clauses. OWLS you know, hard to make time"

"Harry, Daphne Greengrass is a fine looking young witch, surely you can make time for her" said Sirius, trying to cheer Harry up.

"Sirius, we don't get on, okay. We hug, we kiss, we get out of the same room as each other."

"You should have used the potion" said Sirius.

"We're both afraid of the potion. Neither of us had any control in this relationship, and the potion takes our minds away from us too."

"Harry, at least sniff the potion" said Sirius.

"It's not keyed" said Harry, who had read the instructions.

"Best time to sniff it" said Sirius.

Harry opened his trunk, rummaged in the sock pile and found the bottle. He uncorked it and sniffed. It smelt like wildflowers, broomstick polish and mown grass. He corked it.

"Well is that supposed to be some great revelation?" asked Harry.

"So, who does it smell like?"

"I don't know. A quidditch player, probably. Broomstick polish, wildflowers, mown grass"

Sirius's face fell "So not Daphne Greengrass then?"

Harry sudden thought of kissing Daphne, peppermint, parchment and chocolate.

"No, definitely not her" said Harry.

"Sorry Harry, I just thought… you might have grown to love her by now" said Sirius. He looked really sorry.

"Are you serious?" cried Harry "We Have to kiss, we Have to hug, we Have to tell jokes to each other. Not a recipe for love Sirius, too much resentment."

Sirius sighed "I'm sorry Harry, If I hadn't adopted you, this would never have happened."

"Sirius, can you say for sure there's not a dangling contract in the Potter vaults?" asked Harry.

"I can't tell Harry. I can't look in there. But if they did, it probably wouldn't be as bad as a Black contract" said Sirius.

"Oh Sirius, it not so bad. Even after we marry, we don't have to, you know." said Harry.

"Harry, being involuntarily celibate is pretty awful" said Sirius.

"Speaking of which, where's my new step-mother?" asked Harry.

"I, er, haven't found anyone who'd, well" muttered Sirius.

"Nobody will date you" said Harry.

-==0==-

**Greengrass Manor, a few days later.**

Harry and Daphne sit in a drawing room.

"So, we need to laugh" said Daphne.

"Yes we do, and I'm feeling sick, I assume you are too"

Daphne nodded.

Harry took the Amortentia out of his robes.

"Keep that way from me" said Daphne.

"It's unkeyed. Just take a whiff" said Harry.

Daphne rolled her eyes, but accepted the bottle, uncorked it and sniffed.

Her eyes narrowed. "It's odourless" she said.

"Not for me" said Harry, about to launch into a description.

He unstopped the bottle and took a sniff. It truly was odourless.

"You're right!" said Harry.

"Must be defective, I suppose"

"Good thing neither of us drank it" said Harry and Daphne burst into slightly hysterical laughter.

The sight of Daphne laughing, and the ironic reason why tickled Harry's funny bone and he couldn't help laughing too. He clumsily corked the bottle and put it back in his robe pocket.

"Are you laughing at me Mister Potter" said Daphne, pink faced and snorting.

"Certainly not Miss Greengrass" said Harry, snorting to a stop.

"Well that takes care of sugar for a week or so" said Harry.

"But we must still do that" said Daphne.

Harry took out the faulty Amortentia and uncorked it "And this is no good" said Harry "smells of nothing" he said. And sniffed. Smelt of nothing. He corked the bottle and went to stuff it in his robes.

"Spill Potter!" said Daphne.

Harry handed the bottle back "Smell for yourself!"

Daphne uncorked the bottle and sniffed "Odourless" she said hastily and corked it bottle, putting it on the couch.

Harry stood up "Well time for that" he said, and cast the mouth freshening charm.

Daphne stood and repeated the spell.

"Who's turn is it?"

"Yours" said Daphne.

"I'm sure it's yours" said Harry.

"Well we'll both do it then" said Daphne crossly.

Harry approached Daphne and held her in a loose hug. 'She'd got curvier this year.' he was sure.

He leaned forward with practised ease and they kissed, then Daphne's tongue split his lips apart. Harry waited a moment and pushed his tongue back, into Daphne's mouth. It was familiar, and not really unpleasant.

Daphne pulled her head back "Are you still feeling sick?" she asked blandly.

"I think so" said Harry, who was feeling much better but still like he was coming down with something. They leaned in and kissed again, Harry's tongue first to enter Daphne's mouth.

Harry's eyes closed.

They kissed for a while, purely for medical reasons and stopped, both breathing deeply.

Harry felt better than he had all year. "That was the right dose, I think" said Harry, opening his eyes. Daphne looked a bit flushed and her lips were pink and swollen.

"Yes, that was the right dose" said Daphne, stepping back.

"So, two weeks is now too long between doses, isn't it" said Harry.

Daphne nodded "Sweetness only lasts a week or so." she said glumly.

"The cold-like symptoms, they start in around a week" said Harry.

Daphne glared at him "That depends if I'm on my monthly or not." she said bitterly.

Harry gulped. "I'm sorry, I didn't realise"

"So I don't just feel bloated and irritable, I feel like I've got a cold, all because I need to kiss you. Of all people." said Daphne. Harry nodded "Just mirror call me. In fact, call me in three days, we can tell jokes and taste sugar"

"Oh thank you" said Daphne sarcastically "Helping out a poor woman who just want to curl up with a hot water bottle and some ice-cream."

"Well, if that's what you want to do, I'll get on out. We've done what we had to"

Daphne sighed "Yes, and thank you"

"Good afternoon, Miss Greengrass" said Harry.

Harry left the drawing room and was leaving when he was accosted by Astoria, in casual robes.

"Are you alright?" she asked.

"Why yes," said Harry

"And she didn't hex you?"

"No, she was irritable, but we did what we had to, and now we both feel much better" said Harry.

"It's just that Daphne's..."

"Having her monthly" said Harry drolly. 'Where did I get this utter lack of embarrassment from?'

"Yeah" said Astoria.

"We've had to do this all year, it's not the first time" said Harry.

"Oh no, do you two.. "

"None of your business, Astoria. But, no, we hug, we kiss, we tell jokes, we depart"

"You two aren't normal." said Astoria.

"The contract is basically a curse." said Harry. "We're bound by it. That doesn't mean we're ever going to be lovey with one another"

Astoria muttered "You poor bastard"

"Goodbye, Astoria" said Harry, and he flooed home.

-==0==-

Daphne dreamed of holding a man, kissing him, feeling love. In the dream, obviously the hugs were Harry's, because he was the only man she'd hugged, and the kisses were Harry's; she had no other reference but the love… it was a chimera, and when she awoke, she was left with the cold fact of the contract.

She got up and went to her dresser and sniffed her own bottle of the faulty Amortentia again. Sweat, beeswax and treacle tart. Nothing of consequence. Probably just going off. She opened the other bottle of the pair. Still the beeswax smell. Decomposing potions. They'd probably exceeded their shelf life.

-==0==-

**Sixth year**

Remus came back to Grimmauld place a few days before Harry left. He sniffed Harry and looked at him with sad, kind eyes "Oh Harry, I'm so sorry" said the werewolf.

Harry was haunted by the words, though the prefect's badge caused Sirius to mercilessly prank him.

-==0==-

Harry got on the train and went to the Prefect's carriage.

The new Head boy, another Puff, David Corbys greeted him. The Head Girl was Frobisher's little sister Helena from Ravenclaw, and she had a clipboard and a steely gaze.

Hermione turned up, in robes, with her badge on.

The appearance of Daphne Greengrass with a prefects badge surprised Harry.

'I mean her grades are good, maybe not potions, but then Snape is a useless git and mine are no better. Why am I surprised that Daphne, who never gets detention and good grades, and is calm, well mostly calm is a prefect. Come on, I'm a prefect, and I'm an ass. Sometimes.'

Daphne stood next to a nervous looking Draco Malfoy "Touch me and I'll break your arm in eighteen places" she hissed.

Draco looked across the carriage to Harry. Harry, felt the imp of the perverse, and smiled at Draco.

Harry looked around the compartment and noticed the room filling up.

…

Helena Frobisher got around to patrol schedules

"Now we're having mixed gender, mixed house patrols. Because, frankly I don't trust two boys, or two girls, and I certainly don't trust two… for example Griffindors not to let Griffs away with things. So Girls, you'll need to be prepared to hex your patrol partner. The witches smirked.

Harry realised the opportunity, but tried not to show too much interest.

..

"Now sixth years. Greengrass, Potter?"

"Oh please, that idiot" said Daphne. Harry knew she wasn't putting it on either.

Harry nodded.

...

"Come to me to pick out times after you get your timetables. First come, best times" said Helena.

Harry went back to the compartment with his trunk, and sat down. The thought of a whole year of not feeling sick.

"Harry" said Hermione crossly "You have to patrol the train, with Greengrass"

Harry got up and went back to the front car and collected an irritated Daphne. "Where did you run off to, idiot." she said.

They patrolled down the train, checking compartments, mostly for upset firsties.

Harry knelt down and explained to the small blond girl that no, they didn't have to fight a troll.

Daphne looked at him oddly as he shut the compartment door, they stood in the corridor of the gently swaying train.

"Why did you spend so long calming down one firstie?" she asked.

"Oh come on, she was tiny. Besides, fighting trolls is an elective in first year" said Harry.

Daphne looked at him, blinked and burst out laughing. "You ass" she snorted.

Harry snorted. "Thanks" he said. "I'm looking forward to treacle tart now". Daphne looked suddenly distracted. "Oh, if you're lucky there'll be tiramisu" he said.

"Come on, we need to protect firsties from the legends you and Granger made"

"I'd like to point out, it was Ron that knocked out the troll"

Daphne stopped "You're joking"

"No, I'm Sirius" he said, and laughed.

Daphne coughed and stood up straighter "Are you really?" she asked.

"Yeah, and he'd only learnt wingardium leviosa that day"

"Bull" said Daphne, shoulder checking him.

"No bull" said Harry, looking into the next compartment through the window and seeing third years, it looked like, all eating and playing snap.

Several cars down, they found seventh years drinking firewhiskey.

Harry opened the door and barged in, Daphne following.

"Congratulations, you've earned detentions, before the year begins." said Daphne.

"Piss-off Snake" said a large Griff, that Harry thought was James Peake.

"Peake. Language to prefects.. that's another detention" said Harry.

"Harry, my man, you're not Granger. We just want to have a few drinks"

"Sadly, if you'd carried it in in your trunk, I'd let it slide. But not on the train. The firsties are tiny, and you lot are big and drunk." said Harry.

"Harry, don't make us hurt you" said Peakes' buddy… who was Fitzy?

Daphne rolled her eyes. "Potter, stun them and I'll bag the contraband." she said.

"Letting a snake tell you what to do man?" said Peake.

Harry sighed, flicked his wrist and area-effect stunned all the sitting passengers.

He felt it in his magic… and sank almost to his knees, then Daphne grabbed his arm steadying him.

"I didn't mean all at once, you bloody showoff" said Daphne.

"Safest way" said Harry, wobbling and letting his intended hold him up.

"You're heavy" she said.

"You're tiny" retorted Harry.

"I'm only three inches shorter than you" protested Daphne.

Harry grabbed the luggage rack "Shut the door" he panted.

Daphne closed it and pulled down the blind.

"Oh, privacy?" asked Harry.

Daphne flicked her wand at the lock.

"Miss Greengrass, I find myself in a locked room with you, and five unconscious men" said Harry.

Daphne snorted and transfigured a sweets bag into a carry bag and put the firewhiskey bottle in it.

"Shall we search their trunks?"

"They're getting detention already." said Harry.

"You're right" said Daphne, and with waves of her wand, opened the trunks, then cast Accio firewhiskey.

Three more bottles came to her, which she caught one of. Harry dropped his wand and caught the other two.

Daphne held out the carry bag and he put the two bottles in it. Harry bent over to pick up his wand.

Daphne put the fourth bottle in the bag with a clink.

"So dropping all of this with Filch?"

"I think the Slytherin women's benevolent fund needs a bottle or two" said Daphne.

"If you'd said I'd have packed some for you. Nobody' going to search my trunk" said Harry.

Daphne took out a notebook and wrote down the compartment, and then asked Harry for names

"James Peake, Fitzwilliams, Backley, and Mervyn" said Harry.

"Bravo. Four, the year above you. Are you worried about retaliation?"

"No, they just want to drink. I'll do a butterbeer run and get them a case."

"A butterbeer run?"

"I've got a way out of the castle to Hogsmeade, then I pop over to the Hogshead and buy a case."

"And you never told me?"

"You never asked. You get all the secrets August 1997."

Daphne sighed, and wrapped her arms around Harry. "I feel ill." she said.

"Well, we know what to do" said Harry, who was feeling sick with tiredness, but kissed Daphne dutifully. Well, it wasn't bad. But just medicinal, just had to swap some spit because of the curse.

The way his hand held the back of her head, that was for balance on a moving train. Speaking of which made them rub together.

They kissed, medicinally till Daphne pulled back, out of breath.

Her lips looked very pink.

He picked up the contraband and gestured to the door.

Daphne held up one hand, getting her breath back.

After a minute, they left the sleeping beauties, with trunks flicked shut by Daphne's wand.

"Remember Potter, I don't like you" said Daphne.

"It's mutual" said Harry.

"And if we kiss so readily, it's familiarity. We've had to do it so many times" she said.

"Front carriage, to drop this off?" asked Harry.

"I need to abstract two bottles." said Daphne.

"Be careful in dorms with firewhiskey." said Harry quickly "Drunk witches can't hex".

"Oh I won't be the one drinking it." said Daphne. "I'm only selling it"

Harry shoulder-tapped her as the walked along "I feel much better about that"

"Hmh!" snorted Daphne.

-==0==-

The opening feast announcements were… odd

Professor Snape finally got to teach Defence. Professor Slughorn was taking back Potions.. apparently he was Snape's predecessor.

-==0==-

**Griffindor Common room**

The Quidditch team was celebrating their first win of the year.

Music is playing and everyone was drinking and eating… there was some butterbeeer and maybe some firewhiskey in dark corners..

Harry was dancing with himself, 'getting his groove on' as Sirius called it.

Suddenly, someone grabbed his hands and pulled themselves into his dance. Harry suddenly felt an enormous stabbing pain in his chest, in his throat. 'Gala clause…' he thought, and panicked. The room spun and he knew he was dying.

"Get away from me" he cried, "Get the hell away from me" and used his other hand to push the girl away from him. As soon as her hand left his the pain began to subside. He still couldn't breathe properly, and he staggered through the stunned crowd, to the wall, where he slid down it, to sit, hugging himself, shaking. The room stopped spinning eventually. His chest ached.

"Harry! Harry!" said Hermione shaking Harry's shoulder.

Harry tried to focus on Hermione, but he felt awful. God he needed the medicine. And now.

"What's wrong with you Harry?" asked Hermione.

"Contract… won't let me dance with anyone else" said Harry, trying to see only one of anything.

For some reason, his pocket was on fire too.

"Harry, are you saying the contract did that you to you?" asked Hermione, losing it.

"Gonna vomit" said Harry. And did.

"Need the medicine" said Harry, wiping his mouth.

"Medicine? You need medicine" asked Hermione.

"Only cure" said Harry, lolling dazedly.

"Where's the cure?" asked Hermione, looking around "Do you have it in your trunk?"

"Greengrasses" said Harry.

"The Greengrasses have the cure?" asked Hermione

"Only them" said Harry, the room swimming in and out of focus.

"Ron" said Hermione. A slightly tipsy Ron Weasley stood behind Hermione. "Levitate Harry to the infirmary."

Ron shakes his head and, drawing his wand, floats Harry onto a conjured stretcher.

Ron and Hermione separate at the portrait hole.

Harry watches the ceiling as they head to the infirmary. He closes his eyes. Just for a moment.

He wakes in the infirmary. He feels terrible. He can see only one of anything now.

There's a commotion several beds away, and he can hear Pansy Parkinson's strident voice "She was fine, then she keeled over with chest pains". Some other girl he didn't recognise the voice of was talking then Pansy said harshly "Tracy, get a grip. Daphne's young" said Pansy.

Harry's addled mind lathed onto one word. Daphne. The medicine. He needed the medicine.

Harry sat up, surprising Ron "Harry mate. You should wait for the nurse" cried Ron.

"Just a tick" said Harry, in what he thought was a sneaky way and he levered himself upright, and staggered over to the other bed, scattering Slytherin girls like ninepins.

Daphne lay on the bed, shaking and pained.

Harry just pushed through the pain, walked over, leaned down and kissed her on the lips. The feeling of relief was instant. He needed the medicine, and slipped his tongue in. Oh the relief. He felt hands pulling on his shoulders, someone was yelling, but but didn't matter, the relief.

He felt a sharp pain in his back. Nothing compared to the pain in his chest. He kissed, holding himself up, one hand, holding her face with the other.

Daphne moaned. Her eyes opened. She blinked. He stopped kissing and pushed himself up.

"Idiot" said Daphne.

"Sorry" croaked Harry.

Daphne grabbed his head and pulled him back down. They snogged.

People kept pulling at him, yelling, they kept hexing him.

Finally he suddenly felt… nothing.

Harry woke up in a hospital bed. His back ached. His head ached. His throat ached, his heart, it hurt, but not so bad.

He tried to sit up, and couldn't move.

Madam Pomfrey appeared in his field of view. She was looking very cross.

"Mister Potter, you are restrained until Aurors can be called. You sexually assaulted Miss Greengrass, when she was already badly injured." said the medi-witch in a frigidly icy tone he'd never heard her use before.

Harry couldn't work out what to say. He sighed.

He lay, waiting.

Time passed.

There was a commotion and Daphne cried out "Where's Potter?"

Madam Pomfrey ran over and started saying something.

The distinctive sound of Daphne being very cross began.

"You imbecile. I need to see Potter now!" she cried out.

'She doesn't have the most phlegmatic temperament' thought Harry

"We'll protect you from him. Daphne" said Parkinson "I don't care if he's hospitalised. We'll stun him again"

There was the sound of a slap.

"Owwww!" yowled Parkinson.

"Where is my betrothed!" cried Daphne, not sounding anywhere near as loud as usual.

"Your what?" said Parkinson.

"Potter. Where is he!"

"Oh god she's been potioned!" cried Pansy.

"Oh fuck off you silly cow" said Daphne.

There was the sound of a thud, and a crash.

Daphne Greengrass loomed into view.

"There you are, idiot!" she said, and lay down next to him on the bed and proceeded to snog him.

The pain in his chest and throat subsided. His back still hurt like hell.

"Why aren't you moving?" asked Daphne anxiously

"Pomfey's got me restrained" said Harry.

"Madam Pomfrey" said Daphne angrily.

Madam Pomfrey appeared in the corner of Harry's eye.

"Miss Greengrass, I've got a purging potion, that should remove the effects of the love potion you've been dosed with" said the medi-witch kindly.

Daphne turned her head to look at Madam Pomfrey "I'm not potioned, you idiot. We're joined by a particularly vicious marriage contract and the only cure for the curses is to kiss. And swap spit. So if you don't mind, I'm taking my medicine. And un-petrify him. It's more horrible than usual. I feel like a pervert.

Madam Pomfrey wasn't clear enough for Harry to see, but he started to be able to move his arms. He did the obvious thing and held Daphne as best he could.

After a while, he could roll and tried to get comfortable, consistent with snogging the blonde.

His back hurt like crap.

Daphne's arm touched his back and he winced.

Then someone started yelling "Aurors, put your wands down"

Harry felt merely awful, apart for his back, but the more he snogged, the less his heart hurt, so he went with it.

Someone pulled Daphne away from him and he felt very Daphne-less as a result.

It took time to understand things and eventually he saw two Aurors arguing with Daphne and Madam Pomfrey standing around looking guilty.

One of the Aurors pointed a wand at him and Daphne just stunned the Auror. The second Auror reacted and stunned Daphne. Harry felt very unhappy, and also dizzy. He passed out.

Harry woke up, and his back didn't hurt. His heart and throat still felt like he'd run a sprint in deep mud. He lifted his head, cool, he wasn't paralysed.

Madam Pomfrey came over and looked at him sternly

"Can you just skip to the bit where I get medical treatment" said Harry.

"You have curse damage to the heart, lungs and throat." said Madam Pomfrey.

"Uhuh, now Can you do anything for that, or do I just drag myself off" asked Harry.

"Who cursed you?" asked the Medi-witch.

"My marriage contract did." said Harry

"Your what ?" said Madam Pomfrey, shocked.

"Black family marriage contract, dangling, caught me, and Miss Greengrass." said Harry.

"What caused it to attack you" asked Madam Pomfrey.

"The Gala clause. I can't dance with anyone else. Or I die." said Harry.

"And you were stupid enough to risk it, given that you knew?" asked Madam Pomfrey.

"I was dancing by myself, getting down, at the party in Griffindor common room, when some bonehead cut in on my and tried to dance with me." said Harry, dully.

"That still doesn't explain your assault on Miss Greengrass" said Madam Pomfrey stiffly.

"Greeny is the other half. So, to get better ,we have to snog. Swap spit." said Harry. "It's really simple"

"Oh, that explains why she jumped on you and started snogging you" said Madam Pomfrey.

"As if her life depended on it. Which, it does and mine" said Harry.

"That might explain why Hermione Granger roused Professor McGonagall, saying the Greengrasses had the medicine you needed." mused Madam Pomfrey.

"Sorry, I was half dead and loopy from pain" said Harry. "Technically, they make the medicine… Its' Daphne. Or her spit, depending on how technical you wanna be" said Harry, wishing he was asleep.

"And this contract is unbreakable?" asked Madam Pomfrey.

"We've weakened it as far as is possible" said Harry.

"You don't appear in public with Miss Greengrass" said Madam Pomfrey, accusingly.

"Well, she's a Slytherin, I'm a Griffindor, we don't really like each other much" said Harry.

"Yet you ...snog." said Madam Pomfrey, in a very sour tone.

"If we don't we get sick" said Harry, longing for sleep.

"Mister Potter, this is most irregular" said Madam Pomfrey.

"Sure is, now, where's my medicine?" asked Harry.

"Er, here's some water, you may be a bit dehydrated." said Madam Pomfrey, handing Harry a jug.

-==0==-

Daphne put a large box on Harry's lap. He sat up and opened it.

Inside were red t-shirts. The shirts had embroidered on them "Property of Daphne Greengrass", on the front and rear.

"I have badges to go over your robes too." she said.

Harry smiled a lopsided smile. "Sure thing. Anything to avoid dying."

Daphne smiled viciously.

"Do you have some for yourself?" asked Harry.

"Don't be silly, red's not my colour" said Daphne.

Harry laughed "Oh thanks" he said.

"So you got some Green sweatshirts with Property of Harry Potter on them or what?" asked Harry.

Daphne snorted. "I'm not property" she said stiffly.

"Don't be silly, it's the shirts that belong to you" said Harry, holding one up.

Daphne snorted "Keep trying"

Harry nodded , then his hand shot out and grabbed Daphne around the ribs and he tickled her.

She giggled and squirmed. "Stop it..." she said.

"D'ya reckon that was enough" asked Harry.

"Maybe." she sighed.

"Well, see how you go." said Harry.

"Everyone knows" said Daphne.

"Well, that's sort-of a relief" said Harry.

"No it's not." snapped Daphne.

"well, we could just wear rings like normal people" said Harry.

"These shirts cost money. You're wearing them" said Daphne.

"Okay, for running club" said Harry.

"Well, you could get some rings to prevent other people touching our hands." said Daphne.

"Cursed rings… use a curse to save a curse" said Harry.

The rings turned up from Sirius a week later with a note.

_'_

_Set of four Cursed rings as requested._

_If anyone but the other ring holder holds your hand, they get shocked._

_I'm not giving you the ones that are more dangerous._

_Your contract is second page news. _

_You're now famous as a victim of a black cursed contract._

_Sirius._

_'_

Harry looked over the great hall and caught Daphne's eye.

She got up and he followed a minute later.

"Well what?" she said, standing in the front hall.

"Curse rings. Nobody can touch your hands without wearing the other one."

Harry went to hand Daphne the rings, to receive a stinging slap to the head.

"What'd you do that for" said Harry, resentfully.

"You will be putting the rings on my fingers" said Daphne.

"Oh yeah" said Harry. 'bad tempered.. oh… yeah'

"And that's also for nearly killing me by dancing with some slut" she continued.

"Weasley. It was Weasley, and she grabbed my hands while I was dancing" said Harry.

"You said you didn't like to dance!" accused Daphne.

"I was getting my groove on. There was a party" said Harry feebly.

"So you get to dance, but I have to look like a frigid bitch" she shouted.

Harry took one of Daphne's tense, fisted hands, and took a ring.

She opened her hand out.

"You're the only woman for me" said Harry, honestly and slid the ring on her ring finger.

"You'd better remember that!" she said, with a sob, and he put the other ring on her other hand.

"I'm sorry Daphne," said Harry, taking the other two rings and starting to put the on his had.

"Stop" said Daphne.

"What?"

"Hand them over" said Daphne.

Harry handed Daphne the rings and she grabbed Harry's open left hand.

"You're the only man for me" she said, and put the ring on his finger.

Harry started to realise what Daphne was trying to do, and he gave her his right hand.

She uncurled his fingers and put the ring on his right ring finger too.

"So, we're safer now" said Harry.

Daphne looked at him "You don't have any other rings?"

"Just these ones" said Harry.

"Not a heirs ring or anything?" asked Daphne, curiously.

Harry shook his head.

"I wish we could dance" said Daphne.

"We, dance?" said Harry.

"Well I can't dance with anyone else can I" she said bitterly.

Harry held out his hands, and Daphne held them, the rings fizzed slightly on his fingers.

Harry and Daphne awkwardly stepped from side to side, holding hands, not near each other, but dancing as best they could. 'The only way I can' said Harry.

"This would be easier with music" said Harry.

"So find a music box" said Daphne.

Dobby found one very easily.

"Your hand goes on my hip" said Daphne. "You hold my other hand"

After Daphne literally moved his arms one at a time like a pose-able doll, Harry was holding Daphne and they shuffled about on the tiled floor.

Some other students were staring. Harry saw and didn't care. He'd nearly died and this was an apology to Daphne. That it was the only dancing he'd ever do in his entire life… that was a weird thought.

Daphne said "You can turn us as we step"

"Not and not step on your feet" said Harry.

He look up from his feet and saw a few other couples sharing their lonely dance.

The music box wound down and Harry stopped. "So sorry" he said.

-==0==-

Harry found Ginny Weasley in the Griffindor common room.

"Miss Weasley" he said. He didn't feel very friendly, as she'd nearly killed him.

Ginny looked up at Harry hopefully.

"I'm cursed by a marriage contract and I can only dance with my intended, or I'll die, and so will she. So keep your hands to yourself. Never touch me again. You nearly killed me. " said Harry.

Ginny's face went pale. She looked mortified and about to cry.

"Oh and you owe me a favour from first year, so this is it. Keep your mouth shut and if any other witches look like they want a piece of me, you hex them." said Harry.

"You're a prefect, you can't tell me to hex people,. I could get detentions" said Ginny.

"I don't care. I nearly got a funeral. You're handy with a hex." said Harry.

"Who is she" asked Ginny.

"Literally none of your business. Push off carrot top" said Harry, angrily.

Harry stormed off up to his dorm room and put on Daphne's badge.

"Hi, I'm cursed, touch me and I die" said the badge, which flashed red.

'Not exactly the truth, but still, close enough' he thought.

Harry tromped back down the stairs to the common room and saw Hermione and Ron standing looking at one another. 'Get on with it' he thought.

He had prefects patrol that night. He found Daphne using the map as she left the Slytherin common room. He nodded to her from his position leaning against the wall next to the super secret exit of the Slytherin dorms.

She jumped "Asshole!" she said. "You startled me"

"Sorry" he said. They started in the dungeons, and slowly climbed floor by floor, checking the abandoned classrooms, the cupboards and the secret passages that were known snogging spots.

Harry was bored on the second floor and looked at the map to do a quick check "There's nobody there, we can go up to the third floor"

Daphne was furious "We could have just checked this stupid map instead of walking around all night"

"I'm not sure the map shows all the secrets, it doesn't show the chamber of secrets, for example" said Harry.

"There are no students snogging in the chamber of secrets" she said harshly.

"My dad and his friends made the map and they didn't get all of the castle. The might have missed a passage." said Harry.

"That we know about?" said Daphne dubiously

"Well it's been a couple of decades. One student finds it, soon we all know" surmised Harry.

"Hardly" drawled Daphne.

"Dobby!" called Harry.

Dobby appeared with a pop, a rag in his hand. "Harry Potter..."

"Dobby, look at this map and tell me, are there rooms or passages missing?" said Harry, handing Dobby the map. Dobby held it for a few seconds then bit the edge.

"Dobby, don't bite the map" cried Harry, pulling on the map.

"Sorry Master Harry Potter sir" said Dobby.

"Well?" asked Harry.

"The come and go room is missing." said Dobby.

"What's that" said Daphne, with a touch of sass.

"It's a room that is where us house elves store… lost things, because it can be whatever we need." said Dobby.

"The Room changes?" asked Daphne, sounding interested.

"You walks in front of it's entrance three times, thinking about what you need, and the door appears, and the room has it. Mostly we need somewhere to put spare mops and buckets." said Dobby.

"It's a magical mop room" said Daphne, drily.

"Oh no Miss Greeny, the room much more than that. The room of lost things be bigger than the Great Hall."

"Okay, we are going to see this" said Daphne decisively. "Where is it?" she asked.

"Seventh floor, opposite the tapestry of the trolls dancing" said Dobby.

"Dancing?" said Daphne, in a tone that Harry was starting to recognise.

"We're going all the way to the top" said Daphne.

When the door appeared, Harry was very impressed.

When the door opened to a cathedral like space full of lost and things guilty student had hidden, he wasn't so impressed.

"Potter, find a trunk in decent condition" said Daphne.

"Why?" asked Harry.

"Just do it" she said.

Harry dragged a potion stained trunk over to the door.

"Accio booze" said Daphne.

Harry spent the next thirty seconds casting cushioning charms.

"What do you want all this booze for anyway?" asked Harry "Are you an alcoholic?"

"I told you, I just sell it" said Daphne, putting the six sherry bottles into the trunk.

She continued packing firewhiskey and finally butterbeer.

"Can you find another trunk?"

"Why?" asked Harry.

"Because I'm going to Accio jewellery next"

An hour later Harry was impressed with Daphne's cunning.

She'd found a bucket full of, mostly junk jewellery and unpaired earrings, a small sack of coins; which she gave to Dobby, to give to Hogwarts "Always pay the house man," she said. "Though in this case they are house elves"

Then she started on potions. Not many good ones, but a good idea.

When she got him to summon wands… that was really sneaky. And there were a bucket full of them.

"We can take the wands to McGonagall to give to unfortunate students" said Harry.

Daphne blinked at him and just said "Untraceable wands. They're worth ten galleons each."

Accio gems had been interesting. Painful, but interesting, as they'd been pelted by shiny rocks.. "Gringotts will cash these" she said, looking at the bulging, dirty sack happily.

"Shouldn't' we be doing prefect things" said Harry.

"Check the map. If there's anyone obviously snogging, we go bust them." said Daphne.

It did only take a minute.

"Why are you so keen to make a galleon in here?" he asked.

"Well, you've only got the money from the Basilisk, plus whatever your parents left you. I'm trying to get us a nest-egg"

"They had a cottage" said Harry.

"I went there once for a history lesson" said Daphne. "The whole side's missing, the rain's got in. It'd need expensive repairs."

When Daphne told Harry to summon used parchment he baulked "That's junk"

"Humour me"

The cloud of parchment was immense and the piles of junk all fell about.

"Now what?"

"We bundle it up and get rid of it later." said Daphne.

"What?" asked Harry, not getting it at all.

"It's rubbish and it takes up space so we can't see valuable things. Bundled up it's much smaller" explained Daphne.

"Surely we've summoned all the valuable things" said Harry.

"You can only summon what you know of" said Daphne.

"Yeah" said Harry.

"So, what's out there?"

"Old furniture, clothes, bottles… junk, I don't know?"

"Are you infinitely thick?" asked Daphne.

"Well, no"

"Grandmother always said, never throw anything away"

"So we're gonna be hoarders?"

"Are you a wizard?"

"Well, yes"

"Can you transfigure things"

"Well, yes"

"So broken things are useful." said Daphne simply.

"What about the broken furniture"

"Can you cast Reparo?"

"Well, yes"

"Get cracking."

"This will take years!"

"We're here for two more years. Get back to work"

Daphne cried out "Accio size five women's boots"

"You're sorting boots with Accio?" said Harry as boots flew past into a lidless trunk.

"Why ever not?" asked Daphne, looking for another trunk to use.

"What do we do with things we don't need?" asked Harry.

"Sell them, duh!" said Daphne, wondering if Harry had been dropped on his head.

"Where?"

"We can sell them retail, to the shop in Hogsmeade, or rent a shop somewhere over summer and sell them ourselves."

"Our own junk shop?"

"It's not a junk-shop. We're turning opportunities into galleons."

"Knuts" said Harry.

"Don't knock knuts. Five and we've got today's paper."

"So"

"So we sell some size five boots for two knuts, today, and a few more things like that and we've got spending money. For nothing."

"Do people even buy this stuff?"

"Why not, repair charms are easy, so is colour changing. People don't buy much stuff, but cheap stuff sells. We paid nothing, so who cares if we sell it cheaply and quickly." explained Daphne. Harry realised Daphne saw the world differently to him.

"What about the furniture?"

"If you can Reparo it… good. Otherwise, your friend the house-elf… you give him some tools, I'll bet he can fix anything."

"Where will he get wood?"

"The worst ruined things" said Daphne.

"So we're selling furniture"

"No, we're investing in furniture. Otherwise we'd need to buy it later." said Daphne.

They worked late into the night.

"Where will we store all this stuff?"

"Chamber of secrets" said Daphne instantly.

"Not here?"

"Someone could take it. We're working to sort and repair, they could get our labour for nothing."

It was going twelve when Daphne, rubbing her hands over the sorted piles of boots and clothes called it quits.

"The out of date clothes are junk" said Harry.

"Costumes" she said "There's a shop in Hogsmeade."

"Oh and Potter, You're taking me to Hogsmeade" said Daphne on the way out of the room.

Harry must have looked shocked

"Everyone knows, and because it's a cursed contract, I'm getting less crap than I could have."

"Sure. This weekend?"

"Tomorrow night" she said.

"What?"

"You said you could sneak out. You're sneaking me out, and we're having a 'date' in Hogsmeade."

"We're prefects"

"So what" said Daphne. "I've made five galleons off that firewhiskey"

"What about the trunk you just got"

"Oh I expect I'll make ten or fifteen off that"

"Some of it's old, and half-drunken" said Harry nervously.

"And that's why I sell that to boys"

-==0==-

"What do you do all night" asked Ron.

"Practice Reparo, mostly." said Harry honestly.

"Eh, why?"

"I've got to get my own house after school, and furnish it. Broken stuff is cheap. So Reparo" said Harry.

"You're as bad as Mum and Dad" said Ron. "Always fixing everything. 'Cept clothes, they do get a bit thin to spell back to good"

Harry suddenly saw the Weasleys clothes and trunks in a different light. Their house was quirky, true, but nice, and their furniture used, but whole. He suddenly had the urge to talk to Mr Weasley about his family budget. How much do jobs pay anyway. Where do you get food, if you're magical. Harry realised he had no idea. But Daphne... she was already making them money.

-==0==-

Harry led Daphne to the statue of the humpbacked witch "Dissendium" he said.

Daphne got Harry to but three bottles of firewhiskey at the Hogs head, then they went to the Three Broomsticks, where she sat at a table, and Harry got then butterbeers.

"Potter, you're not completely useless" said Daphne, drinking butterbeer.

"Daphne, I, um… you really have good ideas about making money." said Harry, and dived into a butterbeer.

They took some medicine in the tunnel before they re-emerged out of the witches hump. It tasted of butterbeer.

-==0==-

Over the next week, Dobby's trip to Gringotts to drop off jewels made Daphne three hundred and twenty galleons. Harry was pretty sure that was a lot. The Jewellery made less, sold to a jeweller for materiel mostly, but still, another hundred galleons. The bucket of wands Daphne got her father to take to someone and they made four hundred galleons off it. By the end of the week, Daphne had made nearly a thousand galleons, and Harry was certain that the secondhand store, that was on the verge of being leased for next summer, would make a tidy profit.

Instead of organising via mirror, Harry just spent all his free time in the come and go room, fixing and tidying. When Daphne announced that the Hogshead would pay a sickle a crate for bottles, Harry was forced to admit that even empty bottles were worth money. Then, after casting 'evanesco' for an entire Saturday, that half empty bottles of dubious liquid were worth money too.

By second term, the piles of junk, once so high and disordered, started to look different to Harry, like piles of galleons, just not exchanged yet. They were getting less disorderly too.

One evening, after "prefect patrols" Harry leaned over and kissed Daphne, for medicinal reasons. It was as natural as drinking pumpkin juice.

Daphne had taken to doing silly impressions using the vast piles of odd clothes, to make Harry laugh.

"Accio wig" she cried and there was a tinkling sound like falling jewellery, followed by a dusty old wig flying over the mounds of junk.

"Did you hear that?" asked Harry.

"Yeah, jewellery"

"And it couldn't be summoned." said Harry

"So it's magical… and therefore valuable" said Daphne.

It took an hour to find it, a thin, corroded jewelled tiara.

Harry went to pick it up and felt a sudden unease. "There's something very odd about this" he said.

He could almost hear a chittering sound. "It's making a weird sound, and my scar hurts"

"Eeek" said Daphne, drawing back.

"Is it cursed?" asked Harry

"Hmm. I'll try a detection charm" Daphne cast something complicated and the tiara glowed a malevolent purple.

"That's cursed" she said. Harry bent down and really looked at it. His scar hurt. He fell over backwards and scrambled away from it.

"What is it Harry?"

"It's really dark. I've seen something like this before.. It had Voldemort's memories in it. We need to stab it with a basilisk fang." said Harry.

"Is it safe to touch?"

"No. Really really un-safe" said Harry.

"Well, get a box." said Daphne practically. "I'll owl father"

"Or we could get Dobby to go get one"

"With my letter. Otherwise Father will think someones robbing him" said Daphne sensibly.

-==0==-

**The next night.**

Wearing a pair of dragon-hide gloves covered in chunks of some kind of long-forgotten mortar, Harry stabbed the tiara. There was an ear-splitting shriek and a black cloud oozed out of the tiara and faded away.

"What the hell?" said Daphne.

"Well, that's distressingly familiar. I'll have to tell Professor Dumbledore" said Harry.

"I thought you didn't trust him" asked Daphne, frowning.

"And I don't" said Harry. "But he knows about this kind of stuff"

"What's your story?" asked Daphne, tilting her head.

"I found it in the room of lost things,stabbed it with a basilisk fang." said Harry.

"Don't be drawn on details" said Daphne.

Harry nodded.

Dumbledore was astonished. And upset, but let Harry sod off back to his bed.

As Harry had expected, Harry learned nothing… which was itself something; Hanging around with Daphne was doing thing to his brain.

'Mischief Managed' thought Harry.

-==0==-

Harry got an invite to a wedding at the Weasleys.

Harry hadn't been there much, but he knew the Weasleys, and Ron was a mate.

Ron's big bother, Bill who apparently was Indiana Jones (bless Sirius and the bankroll of pound notes) was getting married. To Fleur Delacour, who remembered Harry, and thought he should come.

Harry felt strangely sad... not that that was unusual, but he had to take her with him. So he wrote a letter.

_'Daphne Greengrass,_

_Dear Daphne,_

_I have been invited to a wedding of some friends. As there will be dancing and I wish to stay alive, I would like to bring you as my date. It is in three weeks, and it is Bill Weasley marrying Fleur Delacour. The wedding will be at the Burrow, Ottery St Catchpole, Devon. Bill is a cursebreaker with Gringotts, as is Fleur._

_Do you agree to come along? We will dance, obviously, and take in a wedding. _

_Harry Potter._

_'_

Daphne flooed over the next day. It was an interesting process; not their cursed wedding, but they had to turn up in outfits of equal dressiness; dress robes all round. And in colours that worked as a couple. In the end, it cost Harry two hundred galleons for their robes, and Daphne was very odd the whole time they shopped.

At the wedding Harry danced with Daphne to the best of his limited ability, and for a while, he cheated, closed his eyes and imagined that he was with someone he loved.

If he'd been a third party, he'd have seen Daphne had her eyes shut too. As it was, Ron and Hermione saw and thought they were being all lovey together.

-==0==-

**Just before the start of Seventh year.**

The secondhand store had netted five hundred galleons, and the rent had only been fifty.

"We're hiring someone to keep the shop running. We make more in a day than wages for a clerk, so by the end of the year, we'll have sold all the stock… including the warehouse and have a tidy pile of galleons." said Daphne.

"We should sell the stock to another shop, quit the shop like we planned" said Harry.

"Coward" said Daphne.

Harry didn't know what to do. So he asked Sirius.

"I wouldn't know the first thing about making money. Just do what Daphne says"

"But I've already argued" said Harry.

"And you might be right, but you might not be. You have to trust her judgement, she's made you two a pretty pile of galleons so far" said Sirius.

"She sells confiscated booze in the Slytherin dorms" complained Harry.

"Huh, we did that in seventh year" said Sirius chuckling. "Your dad would confiscate it, and sneak it past your mum and I'd sell it in glasses. Always sell it in glasses."

"Huh?"

"So nobody gets too drunk. Nobody resells it, And you know who's drinking what, and because you make more money" said Sirius.

Harry gave in. He suspected it was going to be a theme in his so-called life.

He went out to Muggle London, and found an arcade and played shooting games for a while. The game took all his money, and left him slightly over-excited. He supposed it was better than nothing.

-==0==-

Seventh Year started, as traditional, with Draco Malfoy visiting Harry on the train.

Harry was not a prefect this year; He'd begged off for NEWTs… and to spend more time turning the room of lost things into the room of galleons as a nest-egg. His cleaning charm was wordless now.

Besides, Ron and Hermione looked spiffy in their Prefect badges.

And as neither of them knew where Harry disappeared to, his evening Snog sessions… carefully metered out to every five days now, were going to be uninterrupted. Well except for fixing the growing mountain of furniture. Stacked neatly down in the chamber, it started to look like a real furniture shop.

"Potter!" yelled Malfoy, breaking Harry out of his revere.

Harry looked up from his textbook "Oh, Malfoy. Good to see you, How were the holidays?"

Draco shook with anger. "You can't ignore me. Just because you're betrothed to Daphne Greengrass, you're still a stupid halfblood."

"Actually Draco, as I did not choose to be Daphne's future husband, it's not exactly a thing I regard as positive" said Harry, in a bored tone.

"Her family is in the sacred twenty-eight, they're too good for you, you should be kissing her feet!" said Draco.

"And.. there we go again….I'm sure you're going to chose your bride.?" asked Harry.

Draco muttered and blushed.

"And I never get to" said Harry

"Greengrass is beautiful and pure-blooded, what's more to want!" said Draco.

"Thank you for complimenting her." said Harry. "But some love, ever, would be nice." said Harry drily. 'I'm starting to sound like Snape' thought Harry.

Silence from Draco and his goons.

"You'd be interested to know, Draco that the contract I'm under is much like the one that drove your dear Aunt Bellatrix insane. You know, how she's in Azkaban, has been most of our lives. SO If you don't mind, I'm trying to enjoy my life… what little there is left of it before one or other of us is driven insane by the curses in the marriage contract and starts hexing all and sundry." said Harry.

Draco snorted "As If, you two go to Hogsmeade, you're a normal couple."

Harry flicked his wand out and with a twist, tipped Draco, Crabbe and Goyle upside down.

"Malfoy, much as I find personally find Pansy distasteful, she at least likes you. Greengrass and I are cursed to be together, and been have to … do things to avoid the courting clauses cursing us. Ask your Mother about them, but be warned, you're only a hanger-on in the Blacks, so you can't inflict them on any of Your children.

"I'd never do that to a child of mine!" said Draco. "Its inhumane!"

"And calling a child Draco isn't?" retorted Harry.

His visitors sodded off.

Times like this, Harry really hated the thing called his life.

Daphne went past later, and didn't stop. She was still prefecting.

Harry went back to his book. Transfiguration was dead useful for fixing things, and charms for fixing things… and, well, turning evening into galleons.

"Oy Potter!" said Daphne Greengrass later, standing over him.

"Harry looked up "Greengrass" he said. 'Wonder what scheme shes cooking up now'

"Your trunk. Open it I'm searching it for contraband." she didn't seem to be kidding.

Harry looked at Daphne "Come on Daphne" he said.

Daphne flicked her wand and slammed the door. Another flick pulled the blind down.

"Open your trunk Potter, or I'll open it for you" she said.

Harry opened his trunk. In one corner, neatly packed were a case of butterbeer, and a bottle of firewhiskey.

"Contraband" said Daphne, and pulled it out, and put it in a carry-bag she conveniently had.

"You're honestly shaking me down for contraband" said Harry incredulous.

"And you'll get a detention" she said.

"Are you just getting back at me for arguing about the shop?" asked Harry.

"I'm getting free stock for my booze store. You, you get detention with filch for a night."

"That cuts into my furniture fixing time. That costs you money" said Harry.

"You argued. It's worth one days profits" said Daphne viciously.

She left. Harry really, really disliked her.

-==0==-

Professor McGonagall had words to say to him.

"Harry Potter, why are you always making trouble. Attempting to smuggle alcohol onto the school grounds. Your detention is quite justified. Prefect Greengrass has shown an admirable level of professional integrity, where you gave up prefect-ship to spend more time doing god-knows-what. If you had been bringing in perhaps some butterbeer, that would have been a different matter. Not firewhiskey. That was crossing the line. Enjoy cleaning toilets with Mister filch for a night."

-==0==-

A day later.

Harry was stacking some tables he'd repaired into neat, piles in the room of requirement when the door opened and Daphne Greengrass, prefect came in.

"Map" she said, without any preamble.

"Why should I let you use my map?" asked Harry.

"So that I can save the night for more profitable activities"

"You could have dumped being a prefect and saved more time"

"Seventh year prefect sounds pretty good on a CV." said Daphne.

"A job?"

"I could get a ministry job, keep my penniless husband" said Daphne.

"Who's actually rich and has a job restoring furniture, with the help of his friend Dobby" said Harry defensively.

"I might want a real job, something challenging." said Daphne.

"Well, do you?" said Harry, interested.

"I'm going to apply to the ministry, Department of Mysteries."

"What do they do?"

"Study mysterious magic" she said.

"Is the pay okay?"

"Better than selling furniture" said Daphne.

"Well, you do that, if you want to"

"You're not going to stop me, or fight, or complain?" asked Daphne

"No, you want to, if you can get it, go for it." said Harry, turning back to a table.

"Why are you so damn reasonable about that?" asked Daphne.

"Why not?" asked Harry, turning and looking at Daphne, curiously.

Daphne shook her head "You fight about keeping the shop open, but you don't care what I do for a job?"

"Oh, as long as you want to do it, feel free"

"Men" she said.

"You want the map?"

"Yes, now"

Harry handed his just-after the end of final-term wife the map.

She checked it quickly.

"Who's your patrol partner?"

"Weasley"

"Ron?"

"He shot off as soon as I said I as going to the library to get the map from you" said Daphne.

"Where'd he go ?"

Daphne scanned the map, folding out sections for awhile. "Broom cupboard with Granger"

Harry wanted brain bleach, but still snorted.

"Don't judge them, they actually like each other" said Daphne.

"So do we do it today, or wait three more days?" asked Harry.

"What, you want to snog early?"

"Might as well" said Harry.

Daphne looked at him "No" she said. "I am not sick, though I could use a laugh, needed two teaspoons of sugar this morning.

"You know we could get some fresh Amortentia..." said Harry.

"I don't think I'm ever going to want to do that" Daphne shook her head.

"Well I bloody do. I want to love someone, to feel loved. And the only someone can be you, because of some fucked up ancestors." Harry sat on the table nearest him.

"I just wish there was some way out of this." said Daphne, gazing across the piles of junk

"I have an idea" she said suddenly.

"An idea?" asked Harry.

"There's a potion that can change a persons family tree" said Daphne.

"It what?"

"It was traditionally used for blood adoptions. It ensures the adopted child becomes an actual descendant of their adopting parent."

"How would that help us?" asked Harry.

"You could take it, become someone the contract won't bind to, and the contract would be invalid."

"Why Me?"

"Because my heritage matters. You'd probably have to use it to become a bastard"

"A bastard"

"It would make the contract invalid"

"Invalid?"

"Like the one with the Riddle girl"

"So I take a potion of make myself a bastard and there we go" said Harry. "Great, who do you suggest I take on as my new father? Severus Snape?"

"Sorry, I was just trying to help." said Daphne.

"Maybe what's what we need to do" said Harry. "I'll owl Sirius."

-==0==-

The next day a letter came

_'Dear Harry and Daphne,_

_Sorry Kids, it won't work._

_Because I adopted Harry, that's all that matters. _

_Using the potion on Miss Greengrass might work but would ruin her life thereafter._

_I did find an exit clause. It is guaranteed to work, but it does take five years. As long as you two don't have a child, five years after the marriage, the contract terminates._

_Sirius'_

"Well, at least it isn't going to be forever" said Daphne, and sighed.

"We don't have choices about being IN this horrible contract." said Harry.

"Don't remind me"

"And we're not going to like each other anytime soon" said Harry.

"Hasn't happened in a year" said Daphne sarcastically.

"Lets just leave that there" said Harry.

"Here's my idea. We're both chained to the same oar, right" said Harry.

"Indeed"

"So, I will try, from now on to make this horrible marriage thing as not awful as I can." said Harry.

"How?"

"Well, for example you wanted to dance right?"

"And we danced, poorly on the front hall of Hogwarts." said Daphne

"And at Bill and Fleur's wedding"

Daphne looked pissed off. Given that was how Harry normally saw her, he continued.

"We're in a room that can literally be anything. We can have our own ballroom. We can dance" said Harry.

"You don't want to"

"I like to get my groove on, proper dancing not that different, and it's make you happy" said Harry.

"And my happiness matters to you why?"

"We're chained to the same oar. We might as well not be miserable" reasoned Harry.

"So that implies we'll have as normal a wedding as we can?"

"Yeah, with dresses and flowers and all that stuff." said Harry.

"Not just a signature in a Ministry office" asked Daphne.

"Not that" said Harry.

They sat silently.

"So you see, my idea is that we accept the things we can't change, they are all awful. But I can be nice about it" said Harry.

"I'm not doing more than swap spit with you" said Daphne.

"Of course not. We just… we don't" said Harry.

"We don't." said Daphne emphatically.

"But we can hug, and we do know how to swap spit" said Harry.

"Is this all about you getting a snog?" asked Daphne.

-==0==-

Harry got pretty good at dancing in the rest of the year.

There was medicine after dancing.

-==0==-

Wedding day. August 3rd, 1997.

They were in a church near Daphne's home. All surrounded with muggle repelling wards for the day.

Harry walked up the aisle and waited for Daphne to arrive.

The officiating wizard was an old one, with wispy hair and glasses. He seemed cheerful. Harry and Daphne hadn't told him just how cursed their contract was. It wouldn't help.

Ron stood beside Harry, holding the rings. Over on the pews, in the front row left, Daphne's mother blew her nose. Astoria looked impressed with the pomp. On the right side, Sirius and Remus looked like serious adults. Daphne's friends and relatives on the left, Harry's on the right.

A Bridal march of some kind played; Harry had no idea what it was, but Daphne had liked it; played.

Daphne came up the aisle in a fancy white wedding dress. She did look very pretty once she lifted her veil. Her father Cyrus stood to one side and looked important.

Harry and Daphne recited the vows from the parchment; the vows they couldn't eliminate.

"I Harry James Potter swear an oath of fidelity; to cleave only to Daphne Isobel, forsaking all others. I swear an oath of loyalty to Daphne Isobel, to hold her secrets close, to defend her from all threats. I swear an oath of domesticity to Daphne Isobel, to find my hearth and home only with Daphne Isobel. These things I swear till the end of my days."

"I Daphne Isobel Greengrass swear an oath of fidelity; to cleave only to Harry James Potter, forsaking all others. I swear an oath of loyalty to Harry James Potter, to hold his secrets close, to defend her from all threats. I swear an oath of domesticity to Harry James Potter, to find my hearth and home only with Harry James Potter. These things I swear till the end of my days."

At the end of that Harry put an heirloom Potter family wedding ring onto Daphne's finger and she slid a gold band onto Harry's ring finger.

"I now pronounce them man and wife" said the officiator. Harry liked the sound of it, he'd heard the line in TV shows and movies and Daphne had shrugged.

Then they kissed publicly, just a quick peck.

They turned to the exit, and music played. Harry couldn't remember what it was called but it was music for leaving to.

He held Daphne's hand and walked slowly down the aisle out of the church.

They rode back to Daphne's house in a rented car, all the outside activities were arranged to be Statute Safe, so they could use muggle vehicles.

They got out and went into Daphne's parents ballroom. It was set up with round tables and chairs, all covered in white linen. They sat at the big centre table, Daphne smiled a lot at everyone.

Harry tried to remember as much as he could of what was happening. Daphne did look like a beautiful bride.

They were eating the first course when Daphne stopped. Patted her lips with a napkin and said "We're freer now than we were. No gala clause, no courting clauses. Just Fidelity Loyalty and Domesticity." she said.

Harry smiled at her "Well that's hardly difficult is it. Not being at risk of sudden death on the dance floor, quite a weight off my mind." he said.

Daphne laughed.

"Now, Mrs Potter, we should dance. It is expected" said Harry, standing.

Harry and Daphne danced slowly in the middle of the dance floor, their eyes shut. Daphne's mum cried, Mrs Weasley cried and Remus cried. Remus had started crying as soon as he got to the reception. His date, an Auror with Pink hair wasn't sure what to do with a six foot two werewolf sobbing. Sirius was watching, pensively.

After the speeches and dinner, Harry turned to Daphne and said "I have a present for you."

Daphne looked at him "Today is a pretty good effort, Potter" she said, a small smile on her face.

"I got Dobby and another elf to fix my parents cottage" he said.

"Oh, I don't think it would be good to live there" said Daphne quickly, her face falling.

"Oh I wouldn't do that. I can still remember them dying there. I sold it to muggles. And they paid an absolute fortune for it. I made two hundred thousand galleons." said Harry, winking.

Daphne looked at Harry "You made what!" she said, looking surprised.

"So I think we can afford a nice house and still have lots of savings" said Harry.

Daphne blinked, gave a sob and threw her arms around Harry and hugged him "You amaze me. I thought we'd have to buy or even rent something terrible. And you did this"

"So you like it" Harry asked.

"I think you've outdone yourself." she said and kissed him, briefly.

It felt like every other kiss, but with simple affection behind it. Not love, because, well they didn't Love each other, but it was the best kiss Harry had ever had.

Harry was pretty sure that he could cast a Patronus off the memory of that kiss.

-==0==-

**Six months Later…**

Harry apparated home from the shop, they'd sold a third of the furniture he'd repaired and it was less a junk store and more an antique furniture store now. The shoes and robes still sold, knuts piling up.

Dobby and his friend Winky had come to an arrangement of some sort, and they took the piles of furniture and other saleable goods from Hogwarts and stored it in a large barn. They hadn't technically paid to use the barn, but the muggle government owned it, and they hadn't used it in years, and as they never drive there in a car to tip of the muggles, it seemed pretty good at the price. It was a lot drier than the chamber of secrets, so Harry did a lot less re-repairing furniture.

Harry looked around and looked down a side-street of Hogsmeade. It was the easiest place to live, as a magical person, and the house had been cheap. Mostly because it needed a new roof, but with two willing elves, and a bunch of Weasleys who turned up at Daphne's parents house one morning and just said "We're off to your house to fix the roof", it had a new roof.

They had furniture… admittedly very old furniture and they'd only had to buy a couple of beds.

Daphne had done quite well in NEWTs getting 4 EE's and the rest A's, and got an entry-level job in the ministry. Supposedly in the DMLE, but Harry knew she was an unspeakable, in the Department of Mysteries.

Everyone seemed surprised that the boy-who-lived, and came first equal in the Tri-Wizard cup was running a furniture shop, with four EE NEWTs, but free publicity was free marketing.

Harry went into the kitchen and checked on the casserole he's set going in the morning. It was ready to eat, and it would not matter if Daphne came home now, or in an hour.

Harry sat down with the duplicate accounts books Daphne gave him and tried to do the accounts for the business for the day. It was difficult… not the maths, the accounting part.

He toiled away, and thought about eating. He didn't actually wait for Daphne to come home before eating, it was just a sort of almost joint meal.

The door opened and Daphne came in.

"Evening Dear, how was work" said Harry, setting the ledgers on the sideboard and getting out some bowls.

Daphne snorted "Fine. How was the shop?" she asked, hanging up her travelling cloak and washing her hands in the kitchen sink.

"Thirty eight galleons" said Harry.

"Today?" said Daphne, her hands still under the running water.

"Two tables" said Harry proudly.

"You're making my ministry salary look bad" said Daphne, turning off the taps and drying her hands on the tea-towel that hung in front of the wood stove.

"Only today." laughed Harry, spooning casserole into bowls.

"Whats' dinner?" said Daphne, sitting down.

"Griffin casserole" said Harry, putting the plates on the table.

Daphne flicked his ear "Chicken I assume?" she said.

"Yeah" he said, waving his wand at the breadbox and levitating some buns over to sit on the centre plate.

They ate quietly, saying what came to mind.

After dinner, cleaned up with some pretty fancy wand-work by Daphne, Harry turned on the Wizarding wireless Arthur Weasley hand given them as a wedding present, and tuned in the dance music channel.

They stood in the small-ish sitting room and danced slowly to the music, their eyes closed.

After half an hour of dancing, Harry went to his room and went to bed, and as usual, cried himself to sleep.

-==0==-

**A month later**

Harry apparated to the warehouse and looked at the dwindling pile of furniture.

Business was good, but the warehouse was emptying out.

'There's still lots at Hogwarts' he thought.

Being end of term in a month, he had an idea.

That night after dinner, he pulled out the marauders map and placed it on the dinner table.

"Hey Daphne, come see this… It's interesting"

Harry poked the locked map with standard revealing spells and the marauders insults began to show.

Daphne came around the table and looked and poked the map a bit with her wand.

She snorted at some of the insults.

"So how does it work?" asked Harry, "I solemnly swear I'm up to no good"

"Why are you using the map now?" asked Daphne, sitting down next to Harry, her elbows on the table.

"I'm thinking about going in with Dobby and Winky and getting more furniture. The warehouse is getting emptier." said Harry.

"I think we should get a warehouse we actually legally control. Not because I work for the ministry, but because the muggles could turn up and take all your stock" said Daphne, resting her head on her hands.

"You were okay with it at the time" said Harry, looking at his wife and wishing wishing he had love in his life.

"I found it" corrected Daphne. You're a mostly respectable business and if you keep going, we'll have a long-term business that keeps us quite comfortable."

"I'll eventually run out of junk from Hogwarts" said Harry.

"We can take some profits, use it to buy an estate sale" explained Daphne.

"A what?"

"A house gets sold with all it's junk. Houses get sold surprisingly cheaply, full of stock we could fix and sell" said Daphne.

"How did you find out about this?" asked Harry.

"The ministry internal newsletter lists the sales."

"The dirty dogs" said Harry, indignantly.

"You have your agent on the inside" said Daphne.

"In the DMLE" said Harry, and laughed.

Daphne frowned at him "It's a secret."

"So how does the map do the insults" asked Harry.

"It looks" Daphne cast a few strange spells "They come from some fixed lists"

"So nothing really clever" said Harry.

"The map's function is very clever. It's tied into the magic of the whole castle. Really it's very well done."

Daphne sat for awhile "You should tell me some secrets" she said.

'Oh yes, Mrs Potter, I would like to explain how to get into Hogwarts.'

"How?"

"The secret tunnel comes out in the basement of Honeydukes. It terminates on the third floor, in the hump of the humpbacked witch. The hump opens when you say dissendium"

"We used that for our date in sixth year" said Daphne.

"Not a lot of people know about it" said Harry.

"Who else knows?" asked Daphne.

"The Weasley twins, Lee Jordan, Sirius." said Harry.

"Why Sirius"

"Because Sirius, Remus and my Father made the map while they were at school" said Harry.

"I'm impressed"

"I'm mostly annoyed. Sirius's party trick with the will made me jealous." said Harry.

Daphne laughed. "The boy who lived, jealous."

"Daphne, I have a bigger secret" said Harry.

"Oh, are you gay?" said Daphne

"No, actually." said Harry.

"Oh" Daphne seemed disappointed.

"I may have… vanquished Voldemort." said Harry quickly.

"Yes in 1981." said Daphne nodding.

"No, again in 1994." said Harry. "With some help from Cedric Diggory."

"Okay."said Daphne,"This is a cup of tea story , or a cup of firewhiskey story?" she asked.

"Tea, we both have work tomorrow" said Harry.

"So it all begins in 1993, when I saved Sirius for a hundred Dementors"

Daphne coughed.

Harry pulled his wand out and cast a Patronus. It was a huge, glowing silver stag. Prongs pranced over and sniffed Daphne. She raised an a hand and felt the silvery mist.

"You've never showed me you could do that, I'm.. I'd say really impressed, but more.., wow." said Daphne.

"So I saved Sirius from the Dementors, and he escaped on the hippogriff that was supposed to be executed."

"How does that work?" asked Daphne.

'Hermione and I used time turner to ride the hippogriff to the tower Sirius was being held in, then he got out onto it. We rode back to the ground, got off and he rode off into the sunset."

"You had a time turner?" asked Daphne

"Hermione's schedule wouldn't work, she was taking every class, so she got a Time Turner and did them all anyway" said Harry.

Daphne groaned "That violates so many good guidelines for safe use of Time Turners" she said.

"You used to confiscate booze as a prefect then a sell it" said Harry.

"That just booze… she could have died" said Daphne.

"So Sirius was free, and I owled him… he gave me money and I had some good times that summer. Saw films, learnt muggle things." said Harry.

"Sounds nice" said Daphne.

"So in fourth year, I ended up portkeyed to a graveyard with Cedric, to be executed for Voldemort."

"That sounds adorably vague" she said.

"He only had one death eater there, and I got him before he got me"

"What about wh-who-shall-not-be-named" stammered Daphne.

"Well I'd killed the body he was possessing in first year, so he was only a black ghostly thing. They'd done something and got him into a baby like body, but deformed and red"

"A homunculus" said Daphne suddenly.

"Anyway, it was stuck under the death eater, couldn't move. His snake tried to eat Cedric"

"What were you doing?" asked Daphne

"I passed out. When I get near him my scar hurts, and I get huge headaches. Sometimes I see what he was seeing and feeling. If he's really happy , or really sad." said Harry.

Daphne looked very surprised by this and spoke up.

"Can I take some notes?"

"If it helps"

Daphne got a parchment and wrote some notes down.

"When Cedric killed the snake, there was some Voldemort magic released." said Harry.

"Some what?"

"A black cloud, it screams then fades."

"And you've seen this before?"

"It's the same as this cursed diary that possessed… well Ginny Weasley back in second year ,and the Tiara"

Daphne looked very surprised and took more notes.

"What did the diary do?" asked Daphne.

"Well, like Mister Weasley says, it would write back to you, and you couldn't see where it keeps it's brain." said Harry.

"Describe the interaction" said Daphne in a suddenly clinical tone.

"It was all full of Tom Riddle's memories. You could write in the diary and it would write back sentences." said Harry.

"Non-repeating?" asked Daphne abruptly.

"you could write about anything. It was like Tom was in the diary." said Harry.

Harry finished explaining about the Diary to Daphne.

She took lots more notes.

"And who knows?" asked Daphne.

"Ginny, and Dumbledore"

"And what does the Headmaster know"

"He's got the diary after I destroyed it, and the tiara. Cedric used bombarda maxima so there's nothing left of the snake. Voldemort,we dosed with the draft of the living death and transfigured into a pebble. We hid him in a cistern." said Harry.

Daphne blinked "I'm not sure if that's the most amazingly heroic thing I've ever hear, or just really annoying." she said, sounding annoyed.

"Annoying?" asked Harry.

"This is exactly what the Department does. Can I tell them?" she asked.

"Um, I suppose you'd better. Do you have any idea what the weird black smoke is?" asked Harry.

"It's definitely something very dark" said Daphne.

"Well, goodnight dear" said Harry.

"What no dance?" asked Daphne.

"It's a bit late" said Harry.

"Goodnight Harry, you brave man" said Daphne.

Harry went to bed and went to sleep, which was plagued by nightmares.

-==0==-

The next day Harry's search for a warehouse wasn't going so well.

That night, Daphne sat down before dinner and said "Harry, I asked my boss. They, well, they want to question you, and do some tests, and they really want the pebble. They'd like the book and Tiara too, but that's a Dumbledore issue."

"So should I let Sue run the shop tomorrow?" asked Harry.

"If you would" she said.

-==0==-

Harry's day was long, involved telling the same story, but to dicta-quills.

The unspeakable uniforms were grey, and you couldn't see their faces, and their voices were all disguised.

The diagnostic spells were, disturbing. The most disturbing part was the unspeakable doing the tests who ran off screaming at one point. Half an hour later, a junior unspeakable took Harry back to a different room for more questions. The important unspeakable seemed nervous, but with some help a different unspeakable took Harry back to the graveyard; they'd worked out where it was based on Harry's memories, and a pensieve.

The cistern was right where it had been, and the pebble that was Voldemort was easily recovered.

They wanted to see the house too, and older Harry admired the building's bones, and the furniture in it. The unspeakables collected the potions book Harry and Cedric had set side to make the draught of the living death.

Harry went back to work, trying to find a warehouse, trickling stock out the come and go room to the government warehouse with Dobby and Winky.

-==0==-

Several days later, Daphne was excited and after dinner, showed him some parchment.

Harry had been expecting something about magic, but it was a section from the internal newsletter, listing a large house for sale, as an estate lot. On paper it looked like a solution to both furniture storage, and supply issues. But Harry found something about the description familiar.

"Daphne, read me the description" he asked, and closed his eyes.

As Daphne read the description, three stories, large grounds, he realised where he'd seen it.

"I know that building" said Harry.

"You do?"

"It's the old Riddle mansion. It technically belongs to lord you-know-who." said Harry.

"Well we can buy it" said Daphne.

"So we should" said Harry.

"Could we live there?" she asked.

"It's a sixteen room house overlooking a muggle hamlet" said Harry, "You could live there with two quidditch teams"

-==0==-

A week later

Daphne came home from work looking upset. Harry was surprised because Daphne liked her job and there was no indication that Daphne had any sort of work related problems.

"Harry, can you come here?" she asked nervously.

"What is it?" asked Harry, confused as hell.

"We know what the magic was." she said.

"Oh, and it's evil, right?" said Harry.

"There's something you need to listen to, in the department" she said, mysteriously.

"Something?" asked Harry.

"A prophecy" said Daphne, as if that explained everything.

"A prophecy?" asked Harry, again.

"We collect them, store them and index them" said Daphne.

"And I should listen why?" asked Harry.

"I don't know. It's about you, and some other people and only the people it's about can listen to it" said Daphne.

"Well, I'll owl Sue then" said Harry.

-==0==-

The prophecy was disturbing. _And neither can live, while the other survives _at the end, had Harry asking Unspeakables questions.

"So I'm not alive?" asked Harry.

"You're alive, Mister Potter" said the Unspeakable's buzzy disguised voice.

"So the prophecy is wrong?" asked Harry.

"When did you vanquish Voldemort, Mr Potter" asked the Unspeakable.

"About a week before my life went to shit" said Harry flippantly.

The unspeakable nodded "So he is vanquished, yet not dead. The last part of the prophecy engages, an your life, Mr Potter, undergoes some improbable circumstances."

"Well being contracted to Voldemort's daughter, Delphini riddle was very odd" said Harry candidly.

"Exceedingly improbable." buzzed the Unspeakable.

"Then you survive that threat and immediately, you are again bound in an even more cast iron contract to the then Miss Greengrass" said the Unspeakable.

"You know about that?" asked Harry.

"It is in Mrs Potter's employee file" said the Unspeakable.

"Figures" said Harry.

"Tell me Mr Potter, do you have a normal life with your wife" asked the Unspeakable.

"That's a very personal question" said Harry, hotly.

"And the answer is very important" buzzed the Unspeakable.

"We don't sleep in the same room, we don't kiss, we just live in the same house." said Harry.

"And you cannot divorce her?" asked the Unspeakable.

"Not with a Black marriage contract, no" said Harry.

"So your situation could be described as that your life is over, Mister Potter" said the Unspeakable.

"Well I may have said that in the past, yes" admitted Harry.

"You might as well be dead, in limbo" said the Unspeakable.

"This is all very depressing ,but I don't see how it's relevant." said Harry.

"We feel it is the work of the prophecy" said one Unspeakable. "Neither can live while the other survives"

"And what do we do now?" asked Harry.

"Well, we think killing Tom Riddle is a good start" said the Unspeakable.

"He won't die I've tried before" said Harry.

"Ah, but we know what he did to stay alive, and despite Headmaster Dumbledore being very uncooperative, we have recovered the artefacts you gave him, and questioned him at length."

"So what are you going to do now?"

"We are going to get some death eaters in Azkaban's life sentences changed to death sentences" said the Unspeakable.

"How will that help?" asked Harry.

"We think you will be pleasantly surprised." replied the Unspeakable.

-==0==-

Harry went back to work. Furniture is good that way. It just is. A table leg is loose… you fix it.

A week later, the Prophet ran a story on the third page about new evidence against three death eaters. Bellatrix LeStrange, Rastaban LeStrange and Rudolphus LeStrange. They had apparently murdered some missing people, and their sentences became death sentences.

The side effect of that was that Sirius inherited Bellatrix's vault.

Stranger still, Sirius got grabbed by the Unspeakables, and returned a day later, and tight-lipped. Though he admitted, the extra gold and treasure was very handy.

The LeStranges' major assets went to a distant family member in America, who'd been ejected from Britain two generation ago.

Harry didn't see why that was so interesting.

-==0==-

The next day, Daphne came home very agitated.

"Harry, you have to come to the department tomorrow, for a… procedure." she said.

"Is it going to hurt?" joked Harry.

"Harry, in all honesty, it probably will" said Daphne, who wasn't eating.

"What's this about" asked Harry.

"The scar on your head Harry, it's a very special kind of curse" she said.

"Don't I know it" said Harry.

"We, that is the Department, think we can treat the curse, and totally cure it" said Daphne.

"Well great" said Harry "Wanna dance"

"I'd like that very much" said Daphne.

She cried as they danced, for an hour.

Harry went to bed, and after crying for the usual hour or so, got to sleep.

In the morning, Daphne looked like hell.

"Have you slept at all?"

"No" she said.

"Do you have to go in today?" he asked

Daphne burst into tears.

-==0==-

A hour later, a confused Harry took his very teary wife to her place of work.

She put on her work robes and was sent off to do something mysterious.

Harry was given a cup of tea, apparently they were still setting up.

He was taken to a room, where he got a splitting headache, as if Voldemort was alive and well.

He could barely see, as an unspeakable man-handled Harry onto a trolley.

Harry, in between the waves of pain, decided that the Unspeakables had sided with Voldemort, and he was being executed. Such a long, drawn out non-life for him.

-==0==-

He was wheeled into a room and when he saw Voldemort, upright, holding wand, he felt such terror.

Voldemort was not moving, which was odd.

Harry's trolley stopped in front of Voldemort's wand. He was panicking, but paralysed.

The trolley tipped up and his head was positioned to exactly in front of Voldemort's wand.

Voldemort's eyes were filmed over, as if he was under the imperious curse. Which made no sense at all.

Voldemort spoke "Avada kedavra" and there was a flash of green.

-==0==-

Harry woke up in a white room, naked.

He wished he had some clothes, and suddenly, there were some folded up.

His wish for treacle tart was unsatisfied. So, this was not heaven, probably hell.

Harry dressed and looked around. There was lots of nothing.

In the distance, Harry heard the distinctive repellent sound of another Voldemort baby.

He strode off, to find a damaged Voldemort baby dying.

Harry gave it a good poke with his finger and it caught fire.

He laid his hands on it and soon it was just ash.

He fainted.

-==0==-

He woke up on a bed in a medical ward. Daphne sat asleep next to him on a chair, looking even worse then before, still in uniform, but with her hood down.

"Daphne" he called.

She woke up and looked at him "You're alive!" she said.

"I take it this procedure was rather risky" said Harry.

"Unbelievably so" she said.

"And you signed me up for it" said Harry.

"Because it could cure you completely and kill Voldemort completely" replied Daphne.

"How?" asked Harry.

"He split his soul into seven pieces, put them in things. The body with the seventh piece can't die, it's tied it the land of the living forever, till the containers are destroyed" said Daphne.

"The book!" exclaimed Harry.

"And the tiara, and the snake, and a ring.. nasty curse on that, and a cup that Bellatrix hid in her vault." said Daphne.

"Seems simple enough" said Harry, wondering where getting killing-cursed by Voldemort fit into all of this.

"And you" said Daphne.

"ME?" asked Harry; who'd clearly lost the thread of the conversation.

"Accident in 1981. He'd split his soul so much it became unstable" said Daphne.

"And what" asked Harry.

"A bit of it got stuck in your scar. Your mother had protected you using some very illegal sacrificial magic,so it couldn't take you over" said Daphne.

"That's a relief" said Harry.

"But it did give you headaches and visions" explained Daphne.

"So I'm cured" asked Harry.

"And the prophecy's complete" said Daphne.

"So what?" asked Harry.

"And neither can live while the other survives" said Daphne, as if that explained something.

"So, My life's messed up by the accident of the contract, So's yours" said Harry.

"Caused by the prophecy" explained Daphne.

"And now it's over, what, the contract will disappear?" asked Harry, curiously.

"No, Harry it won't, but we only have a few more years" explained Daphne.

"So no change then" said Harry.

"Harry, you might have to live with me, and we can't love others, and all that. But at least now you have a chance" said Daphne.

"Thanks love" said Harry.

Daphne looked at him oddly

"It's just an expression" said Harry.

"Well, I've got a day off owing, and you can go home" said Daphne.

"Lets do that Mrs Potter, lets do that" said Harry.

That night Harry cried himself to sleep.

-==0==-

The next morning Harry walked into the kitchen, greeted his wife, who'd either slept better or taken Dreamless sleep potion, and made cup of tea. Harry felt pretty good.

"So fancy going to look at the old Riddle House?" he asked.

She looked up at him tired, red eyed and said "I don't hate you anymore."

Harry shrugged "I haven't for a year. I had people to hate, didn't have the energy to hate you for something you never did"

-==0==-

Mr and Mrs Potter apparated to the graveyard at Little Hangleton, because that's where Harry knew the location, and strolled up the path to look at the house.

"This has muggle repelling charms all over it" said Daphne.

"Probably Voldemort" said Harry nonchalantly.

They looked at the outside of the house, it was falling apart.

The inside was much better, and Harry liked the look of the furniture.

"Rather than sell it off, it could all be restored" said Harry.

"You want to live in a sixteen room manor?" asked Daphne.

"Your parents have nine" Harry pointed out.

Daphne laughed. She had a pretty laugh.

That night they danced, their eyes closed to the music on the Wizarding wireless, and then went to bed.

Harry cried himself to sleep.

All was hell.

-==0==-

The next day, Harry contacted the ministry via floo about the Riddle house.

Delphini had been sent to Azkaban for using unforgivables, and the official said, the liquidation of the estate had encountered a snag, as the goblins had found a distant relative who was alive.

Harry thanked the official for their time and stood up.

He went back to furniture.

About lunch time, an owl dropped a letter on Harry.

'Harry Potter,

The old curiosity shop

Diagon Alley.

Harry Potter,

You are requested to attend a intestate properties meeting

two pm today.

Estate services, Grabbit, Snatchit and Runne,

Lawyers.

Diagon Alley.

'

Harry turned the sign over to closed, Sue would be back later to run the till.

He went to the back room, ate lunch (cold casserole), tidied himself up and went to see the lawyers.

-==0==-

"Mister Potter, so glad to see you here. This meeting is to inform you that your distant cousin, Tom Marvolo Riddle has died, and left no will. As his mothers family has been, er, gone for some time, you are the nearest living relative."

He had a bastard daughter" said Harry, seeing more paperwork in his future.

"She's not able to inherit, due to her legal status as a user of the Unforgiveables." said the Lawyer.

"So once the appropriate forms are signed, you will inherit Tom's estate"

"And what is that?"

"A house, some land, not magical, he inherited it from his muggle father" explained the Lawyer.

"Oh really, well, where do I sign?" asked Harry.

"Here is the form" said the lawyer.

"I just need to take this past my wife. She's got the real business sense" said Harry.

"No hurry Mister Potter, we will be taking some modest fees, on an hourly basis, of course"

Harry smiled "See you later" he said and walked briskly out of the room holding the form.

-==0==-

That night, Daphne arrived, looking tired but happy to eat dinner.

"I was given this from the executor of Tom Riddle's estate" said Harry, sliding it over.

"Apparently I'm the nearest relative not in prison for life." he explained.

"And you didn't sign it?" asked Daphne.

"I wanted you to look it over" said Harry.

Daphne's lips twitched "You can learn?" she asked, jokingly.

"Take it to work if you want, they're going to bill hourly on hours expended" said Harry.

"Grass snakes" said Daphne.

"But cheaper than the ministry, who now can't sell it, because I probably own it" said Harry.

"You checked that today?" asked Daphne.

"Seemed prudent" said Harry.

Daphne's lips twitched again "You really can learn!" she said.

Harry turned on the radio to the music show.

"Harry turn off the radio, I want to talk"

Harry did as he was bid.

"Harry, I know we've got nothing in common" she said.

"Apart from the last three years" said Harry.

"Granted." said Daphne.

"And that my family is different to yours" said Daphne.

"Mmm" said Harry.

"So, why do we get on so badly?" asked Daphne.

"I think we resent each other." said Harry.

"What?" asked Daphne.

"We say, it's the contract, not you, but we're the face of the contract to each other." said Harry.

"You know, you're right" said Daphne.

"Had to happen sometime" said Harry.

Harry pointed to the Radio "Dance?"

"Not tonight" said Daphne.

Harry sighed and sat waiting.

"Harry?" asked Daphne

"Yes?" said Harry.

"Why have we not fallen afoul of the compliance clause in the contract?" asked Daphne.

Harry thought about this 'The clause punishes us if we don't comply with the vows. The vows are

Fidelity Loyalty and Domesticity, right?"

"Yes" said Daphne.

"So are you unfaithful to me?"asked Harry.

"No, of course not"

"Me neither" said Harry.

"So we're complying" said Daphne, "Or are we? Are we just not not complying"

"What" asked Harry, his brain stalled.

"Whats infidelity?" asked Daphne.

"Having sex with someone outside the marriage" said Harry.

"So is not doing that fidelity?" asked Daphne.

"That's a tricky question" said Harry.

Harry got a dictionary from the bookshelf, a gift form Hermione which was mostly used for crossword puzzles.

"Oh. Faithful devotion or submission, unswerving allegiance, conformity, fealty" read Harry.

"Oh indeed Mr Potter." said Daphne, sounding intrigued.

"Just for the sake of an experiment, how about a snog?" asked Harry

"A snog?"

"You do remember how we snogged" said Harry, blushing a little at the memory of that memorable snog in the infirmary.

"For the courting clause" said Daphne.

"One more time." said Harry.

"I think this is a silly idea" said Daphne.

Harry and Daphne got up and embraced loosely

"Who's turn is it?" asked Harry.

"Not yours" said Daphne, and kissed Harry. Treacle tart, beeswax and sweat.

Daphne slid her tongue into Harry's mouth and they osculated.

Harry pulled back "Well that was a bust" he said.

"What were you expecting?" said Daphne, licking her lips and brushing lint of her clothes.

"Some sort of magical pain relief as per how it used to work" said Harry.

"No" said Daphne "Goodnight Harry" 'Damn he was so stupid , you could use his head as timber.'

Harry went to bed and couldn't sleep. He kept thinking about how he wanted to snog his wife's brains out. He sighed and went to the bathroom, and thought of his wife.

He didn't feel any less inclined afterwards.

He went to bed and slept very little.

-==0==-

He woke early and started breakfast.

Daphne came in to the kitchen, her hair damp from the shower.

Harry sat to eat breakfast and stared at his wife. His beautiful, young wife.

"Harry, why are you staring at me" asked Daphne.

"I um, want… nothing" said Harry.

Daphne got up to get toast, leaned over and kissed the top of Harry's head.

Harry ate some toast, drank some tea and got his bag.

Daphne got up and followed him

"What are you doing"

"Today's Saturday, I'll come and work on the books" said Daphne.

They apparated to the shop, unlocked and Daphne sat in the back room, working on the accounts while Harry mended a desk.

Daphne got up "Harry, I just need to check something"

Harry shrugged, and Daphne grabbed his buttocks. "Yup, as hard as they look" she said.

Harry turned around "What the!"

"Look Harry, we're married, I was just wondering, are they really that hard and… well they are" she said.

"That's.. I didn't ask for that" said Harry.

"And you can put up or get your mind broken by the compliance clauses" said Daphne.

"When you say it like that, I hate you, dear" said Harry.

"The feeling is mutual. Though, you do have very hard buns." said Daphne.

"And what's stopping me from grabbing you? You look like, well a very beautiful woman" said Harry.

Daphne laughed "Thanks for the compliment, but touch me and I'll hex you in your sleep" said Daphne.

Harry fixed a broken drawer and a wobbly leg on the current table.

"Harry, you need to kiss my feet" said Daphne.

Harry looked confused, then suddenly felt the compelling urge to kiss Daphne's feet.

"Don't fight it Potter, you'll fry your brain" said Daphne.

Harry knelt and kissed Daphne's feet.

"Why'd I do that" he said, standing up

"Because fidelity means faithful devotion or submission, and Harry, you're my servant from now on"

Harry felt something melting in his brain… not his sanity.. just his will to fight Daphne.

Daphne looked at Harry with a look of sympathy "Harry, I don't have anything against you ,but really, if you'd realised how this contract's compliance clause worked, you could have enslaved me, and that is unacceptable. This way, I don't get forced to do anything I don't want to, and you get to keep your mind; such as it is."

-==0==-

That night, Harry cried himself to sleep.

Daphne's last words to him that night were "And Potter, you can't tell anyone you're my servant."

-==0==-

A year Later

The Riddle house finally cleared probate and Harry took possession.

Within the week the spare rooms were full of furniture, the the muggle warehouse was again empty.

Harry finished cleaning up the kitchen and went to his bedroom.

One he sat down on the bed, he started to cry again.

He lay down, and after an hour or so, of crying, he fell asleep.

-==0==-

Their fifth Anniversary came and Harry and Daphne sat in their large, grand living room, looking at the contract, sitting on a silver salver.

The birth of an heir clause started to glow red.

They cheered as the contract burnt itself to cinders.

Daphne handed Harry a glass of champagne "To you, Harry Potter. You kept your agreement and we exited the contract." said Daphne.

Daphne picked up a glass for herself.

"You enslaved me for two years" said Harry bitterly, staring at the bubbly drink.

"I was just protecting myself. You would have gone mad with lust and enslaved me to be your sex slave" said Daphne. "I just took preemptive measures" she said.

"It was worse than the imperious curse" said Harry hollowly.

"Oh really, and did I make you do anything unpleasant?" asked Daphne.

"Not really" admitted Harry.

"So could I have a foot rub now?" she asked.

"Are we even still married?" said Harry, fingering his wedding band.

"I swear that that killing curse damage your brain" said Daphne. "We Had to marry because of the cursed contract. We are still married. We can get divorced now" she said.

Harry swigged the champagne. "Ergh. A bit bitter" he said.

"Oh you probably wanted a cold butterbeer" said Daphne sarcastically.

"Well, yeah, I like butterbeer" said Harry. "So why do you want a foot rub now?"

"Because you're not compelled to do it" said Daphne.

"And as gratitude or being enslaved, I'll give you a footrub." said Harry.

"No, as gratitude for being married to me, you'll give me a footrub." said Daphne.

"But I never wanted to marry you in the first place" said Harry.

"You were pretty enthusiastic snogging in the infirmary" said Daphne, smiling at the memory.

"You climbed onto me" said Harry, his mind recalling the snog. It had been rather great.

"Because you'd been dumb enough to dance with some skank and nearly kill us both!" said Daphne.

"Goodnight Potter, probably divorce you in the morning" said Daphne and stood up.

-==0==-

Harry went to sleep thinking of all of Daphne's things he would send away with Daphne when she left. The bowl her mother gave her. The vase from her aunt Sophia. The portraits of horses.

-==0==-

That night Daphne came home to find no dinner.

"You didn't make dinner?" asked Daphne.

"Well, where's the divorce papers?" asked Harry.

"I didn't get around to it" said Daphne. "What are we going to eat?" she asked.

"Pub grub down in the village" said Harry.

"We'll have to go muggle" said Daphne. Harry rolled his eyes. "Come on, your jersey and jeans." he said.

Daphne took a very long time to get ready.

-==0==-

Harry and Daphne, in jerseys and jeans went to the Strangled Lark down in Little Hangleton.

Harry noticed that his wife had a more than usually amazing bust.

They opened the door and went in.

The pub was very old, dimly lit and quiet, with a few locals at tables and a group playing darts.

Harry went over to the bartender, a large orange haired man with big mutton-chop whiskers.

"Hello, Harry Potter" said Harry.

"Ted Ainsworth" said the Bartender

"That's my wife Daphne, we bought the old Riddle place" said Harry.

"Oh, been there long?" asked Ted.

"A wee while" said Harry, and Daphne frowned.

"Oh I forgot to cook and we need two dinners, whats good?" asked Harry.

"Shepherds pie" said Ted thoughtfully.

"Well two, and a couple of ciders" said Harry, pulling a wallet out.

"What d'you do" asked Ted.

"I fix old furniture, Daphne works for the government" said Harry.

"Oh ah?"

Harry nodded.

"You're not from round here then?" asked Ted.

"I'm from Surrey" said Harry. Ted nodded

"Daphne's from Hampshire". Daphne folded her arms "Get on with it Harry" she said.

Harry took a glass of cider and handed it to Daphne. She took a sip. "Not terrible"she remarked

"Well Thank you Mrs Potter, from the big house" said Ted, pulling his forelock.

Daphne's eyes narrowed. Harry stepped back from the bar and put an arm around her. He gazed at her 'please don't hex everyone' he thought, closely followed by 'Damn she's stacked.'.

Ted snorted. "Sorry Mrs P. Just joking" he said.

"Get your drink" said Daphne.

Harry walked back to the bar as Daphne headed tablewards.

"You you two've been married few years then"

"Does it show?" said Harry ,taking a pull on his cider

"She's not happy being here, but you hug her to calm her down." said Ted softly. "You're like an old married couple."

"I've known Daphne for… must be over eight years" said Harry.

"Well, I'll being your dinner when it's dished, Mister Potter from the big house. Harry flinched.

Ted's eyes narrowed "So you're from Surrey but people treat you toff and you don't like it. And your wife's a classy one with a big temper. I reckon you're slumming it fixing furniture Mr Potter"

"Antiques." said Harry. "Since before I left school"

"Antique dealer? Well, that explains how you got the big house" said Ted.

"I do alright" said Harry.

"And the little woman more than does her share" said Ted softly.

"Are you a mind reader, Ted?" asked Harry.

"No, just a bartender." said Ted, and started polishing a glass.

Harry took his pint over to the small table where Daphne sat looking at Ted with a hint of a glare.

"He made fun of me" she said.

"He made fun of me too." said Harry. "They've not had anyone at our house in fifty plus years. He's feeling us out"

"Well, on a brighter note, there is a juke box here, and we can have our after dinner dance." said Daphne.

"Is there waltz music?" asked Harry.

"You can… get your groove on I believe you said" said Daphne.

"And you can survive that" asked Harry.

"I've been married to you for five years. I'll cope" said Daphne.

After dinner, they compromised with a slow song.

As usual, they danced, slowly, eyes closed.

Ted and most of the locals watched with interest,well the ones that weren't playing darts.

Harry and Daphne left after the song ended.

-==0==-

A minute after the door shut Ted said loudly "Harry Potter, Mends Antiques, Daphne Potter, works for the government. Ten to one He's old money,no bet she's old money."

"Why's he old money?" asked Janice a woman of indeterminate figure, who did something with administration in the council down in the big town.

"Mrs Potters got a ring you could moor a boat to on her finger." said Ted.

"That Mrs Potter's a fine figure of a woman" said old Jeffry.

Old Evan, who had a beard a sparrow could choke on snorted "See them dancing, them lovebirds do that every night"

"Howd' you know that?"

"I can lipread" said Old Evan. "cos I'm mostly deaf you daft arse" said Old Evan.

"Think we'll see them at the fete?" asked young Bill, a very blond, wet, Anglican young man, who was pants at darts.

"She's a bit high powered government job for that" said Ted.

"A real looker but the temper on her." said Basil, who moved things from place to place.

"Mr P just jumps to hug her." said Ted.

"Holding her back more like it" said Old Evan. "She was going to put you in your place."

-==0==-

Harry and Daphne walked back home and went to their beds.

Harry didn't cry but slept poorly. Visions of Daphne haunted him.

-==0==-

Harry was woken very early by Daphne coming into his room "Oh My Head!" groaned Daphne at what Harry quickly discovered was 4 am.

"For gods sake woman, why'd you wake me!" cried Harry, holding his head, which hurt.

"I need hangover cure" she said, from the doorway to his room.

"So do I" said Harry.

"Well there's none in the cabinet" said Daphne stiffly, holding an empty potion bottle.

"SO I have to go make some" said Harry.

"You're the one with a NEWT on potions" said Daphne.

"I got an A" said Harry, and got out of bed.

"And put on a work robe, you'll ruin your pyjamas" said Daphne.

Harry thought about hexing her, just one of his father's old spells… hang her upside down by one ankle...don't think about that.

Harry lit his wand and opened the locked door to the basement and went down the stairs. Daphne following him with her wand lit.

They went to the locked room with the potions lab in it, and stepped through the second set of muggle-repelling charms.

Harry got the potions textbook down off the shelf and found the right page.

"You haven't memorised the recipe" asked Daphne.

"I'm having difficulty thinking, dear" said Harry.

The potion came out looking a pleasant whitish-blue.

Harry decanted two vials and bottled the rest in the bottle Daphne had brought from the bathroom.

"Bottoms up" said Harry.

Daphne and Harry drank the potion. Within moments, Harry's headache disappeared.

Daphne sighed.

Harry handed Daphne the bottle "Here you go" he said.

Daphne smiled briefly.

Harry evanesco'd the cauldron and tidied the workbench.

Daphne stood there, wand raised, making light.

"Thank you" said Harry.

"We should get a lamp" said Daphne.

"I think the Aurors took it" said Harry. "Or someone since"

Harry lit his wand and they left the basement, locked up behind themselves and traipsed up the stairs to the third floor where the good bedrooms were. Harry looked upwards and watched the frankly gorgeous ass of his wife in a nightgown as she climbed the stairs. He got hard. It's not perving when it's your own wife, he rationalised.

Embarrassingly, Daphne stopped on the landing before his room. He held his wand as far from his body as he could, trying to keep his pyjamas in shade.

"Thank you for the potion Harry" said Daphne "See you in the morning."

Harry watched Daphne turn and walk down the hall to the bathroom.

He entered his room and shut the door.

A quick tap of the lamp and he had some light, and he locked his bedroom door.

He put his holly wand down and opened the sock drawer. There, under some sock in the back corner was a purple bottle. He got out out and uncorked it. He sniffed it. It smelt of nothing. Just chocolate, peppermint and parchment.

He corked the bottle and put it away. Looking down, he'd lost his reaction. Whew.

He got back into bed, took off his glasses and tapped the lamp. Darkness.

-==0==-

Later that morning, get got up and dressed, and went downstairs.

Daphne appeared after breakfast was on the table, long hair still a bit wet. She was wearing a grey skirt and a black and white striped shirt. It was very Daphne.

"Next time we go to the Strangled Lark we're not having the cider" said Harry, to have something to say.

Daphne nodded "Too lethal" she said.

"Here's your toast" said Harry, handing Daphne a toast rack with warm toast.

He poured a mug of earl grey tea, two sugars, added milk "And your tea"

Daphne bit into marmalade toast, drank some tea "Running late" she said.

"Well yeah" said Harry.

Harry ate breakfast, Daphne getting up to put her plate and mug in the sink.

She stopped near Harry "Did you not wash this morning?" she said, sniffing.

"Er, running late" said Harry.

"Honestly you smell of sweat and beeswax and..." Daphne stopped, grabbed her bag and walked very briskly out of the room.

There was a crack as Daphne apparated to work.

Harry wondered about the villagers. 'Fuck it I'm going to need to get a car' he thought. 'Can't confound them forever', they'll wonder how Daphne gets to work.'

-==0==-

Harry went up to the first floor after cleaning up the breakfast dishes. The rooms on this floor held spare stock, and Harry went to the end room and mended the drawer slide on a cabinet. Sue would open up and work the till, and knew to floo over is there was something urgent.

Harry started a casserole, and looked around for meat. Seeing nothing, he went outside, checked for muggles and cast as strong an 'Accio rabbit' as he could. Rabbit casserole tonight for a change.

The day passed, the clock in the hallway ringing, reminding Harry to have some lunch.

After some bread and tea; the casserole looked and smelt like it might be good tonight, the lemon was working with the rabbit., He found himself going to his room and, after locking the door, opening his sock drawer and pulling out the purple bottle, The bottle that smelt of nothing but chocolate, pepper mint and parchment. He uncorked the bottle and sniffed. Citrus, bergamot and lavender. He quickly corked the bottle and stared at it. 'Too much to hope to ever fall in love with his wife now it's all over' thought Harry bitterly, and put the bottle away, so it could not accuse him.

He went to the bathroom, splashed cold water on his face, stared at his red rimed eyes in the mirror, took a deep breath and left for the shop.

Sue, an older witch with a complicated messy past, but who worked for what they paid ran the daily selling part of the shop, greeted him from the counter. "Afternoon Harry" she said.

"Hows the shop" Harry asked.

"Someone asked for parchment, of all things" said Sue, shaking her head.

"How would you use used parchment" said Harry "evanesco doesn't work on it" he said lightly.

"Oh you can scrape it clean if you're careful" said Sue. "We're nearly out of boots"

"We won't have more till we get another estate lot, I think" said Harry.

Harry moved furniture, greeted Dobby and Winky, who popped stock in to fill the spaces that had opened up from selling furniture. They brought four small bales of used parchment.

The day wound to a close, Harry tired from his broken night. He picked up some dessert, to make it up to Daphne for the night before and the cursed cider.

-==0==-

He apparated home, stasis charmed dessert and went and looked at the storerooms again.

"Dobby!" Harry called.

Dobby appeared with a pop "Oh, Great Master Harry Potter Sir, Dobby is so pleased to see you" said Dobby, holding a tea-towel.

"Oh Dobby, are you making dinner?" asked Harry.

"The little ones need regular meals" said Dobby.

'Oh shit. Dobby and Winky have little elves and I never knew. Hermione would gut me with a rusty hook if she knew I didn't know.' thought Harry.

"Oh, Dobby, this isn't urgent, you go back to your family, I just wanted to go see the room of lost things, pull out some things to mend and sell" said Harry.

"Mistress will be needing dinner" said Dobby, shaking his head and popped away. Harry realised he didn't know where Dobby and Winky lived, which was weird, as they were house elves. Maybe at Hogwarts still. 'What had he been doing for the last year.' he thought, then remembered, bitterly.

-==0==-

Daphne arrived home looking tired, but her hair was orderly, not a hair out of place. Harry's lip twitched. She still presented the same highly groomed facade to the world.

"Dinners here when you are" said Harry.

Daphne sank into a chair. "I need a good nights sleep" she said.

Harry dished up dinner.

Daphne ate thoughtfully. "Rabbit casserole, aren't we being fancy". Harry snorted "Accio'd it out of the gardens" he admitted.

When they were finished picking at the casserole, Harry served Daphne the Tiramisu.

"Tiramisu!" she said "That's far too much, I'll only eat a quarter of that".

Harry picked up the plate and split it off, stasis charming the main portion.

Daphne waited, looking slightly amused, till Harry replaced her plate. "There" said Harry.

"Why thank you Harry" said Daphne.

Harry cut himself a slice of Treacle Tart and sat back down.

Daphne eyed the Treacle Tart as if it was toxic.

Harry ate Treacle Tart. Harry reminisced at the taste of Hogwarts, 'ample food, of warm beds, soft sheets.'

Daphne pushed the tiramisu to one side. "I got the papers" she said abruptly.

Harry dropped his spoon.

He pushed the suddenly tasteless Treacle Tart to one side, and waited.

Daphne pulled a scroll out of her bag and handed it over.

Harry summoned a self-inking quill and filled in his name and details.

"I had to go have a shower at work after lunch. I felt so gross after this mornings effort" she said, filling the silence.

Harry finished filling in his section, and he handed the quill and paperwork back to Daphne.

"It still needs to be filed, there's a fee and it takes a few weeks" she said, mouth pursed, filling in her section of the form.

Harry walked to the drawing room, turned on the wireless, and waited.

Daphne arrived, a bit watery eyed.

They held each other gently and danced, their eyes closed.

Harry tried not to cry on Daphne's blouse, she really loved this black and white one with the Gibson sleeves. Her hair smelt faintly of lavender.

They rocked, slowly dancing orbits around the room, Harry keeping an eye out, but their feet knew the room.

After an hour or more Daphne stopped, leaned over and kissed him on the lips.

She tasted of earl grey tea, of the lemon from the casserole.

"Good night Harry." she said softly.

Harry let her go, turned off the wireless and went upstairs.

He closed and locked his bedroom door, 'Bergamot, Citrus and a hint of lavender' he thought.

He cried himself to sleep.

Nox.

**AN: I ****had ****wondered what would happen if ****the perennial ****marriage contract story happened to actual human beings. I'm not sure what would have happened, but maybe this? ****My version probably has less uxoricide/matricide.**

**A****N2: They had already signed the paperwork ****by the time Harry worked it out****.**

**AN3: Not advocating arranged marriages. **

**AN4: Corrections by alix33.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Harry Potter and the Unwanted Marriage Contract, State of denial**

_The next part._

**Some morning, Harry doesn't care.**

Harry Potter, recently divorced, woke up in bed. He got up and showered, then went quietly downstairs.

He made breakfast, set the table and waited.

After an hour of waiting, the Daily Prophet had arrived; nothing interesting going on.

He climbed the stairs and went up to the third floor, and along the landing to Daphne's room.

The door was open, the bed empty. On the bed was a folded letter. In Daphne's handwriting it was labelled 'Harry'.

Harry entered Daphne's room cautiously, and saw that the wardrobe door was open, the wardrobe empty. He suddenly felt a sinking feeling in his stomach. He snatched the letter from the bed.

_'Harry,_

_I've gone to my parents house to stay._

_I don't feel comfortable here now._

_I'll come and see you at the shop to discuss separating our assets._

_Daphne'_

Harry crumpled the letter in his fist. He'd known that they were getting divorced, the contract had burnt up, but to find her gone, and after he'd smelt the Amortentia. He dropped the letter and went back to the kitchen. He ate mechanically, the eggs and bacon tasteless. Hedgwig turned up and Harry gave her most of breakfast. "Just you and me now, girl" said Harry. Hedgwig ate the bacon and flew off to her perch in the outer cloakroom.

Harry apparated to the shop and opened up.

He went to the back room and started making a new leg for the latest table.

Sue turned up at ten and took over the till.

At about twelve, the shop door opened and Daphne arrived, looking tired. Sue called him "Harry, Daphne's here!"

Harry came out of the back room and nodded to Daphne. She marched the length of the shop and Harry backed into the back room.

"So" said Harry, leaning on a workbench.

"So" echoed Daphne.

"You want half of everything?" asked Harry.

"Half of our income since we got engaged. You can keep all of the Potter and Black vaults" said Daphne.

Harry blinked "That's not much"

"I'll have half of the basilisk funds" said Daphne firmly.

Harry nodded "Your idea in the first place" he said.

"It will take some time to work out the split." said Daphne. "Our accounts were largely cash in the beginning."

Harry chuckled "You selling booze in the dorms. And shaking me down for booze on the train. McGonagall was furious. Thought I was up to no good."

"How are your parents taking it" asked Harry.

Daphne took a deep breath "Not they way I thought they would" she admitted.

"What?" asked Harry, suddenly concerned.

"Mother and Father have had some sort of bizarre conversion and are acting like very traditional parents. They insist I'm wrong, and that We shouldn't have got divorced."

"Are they going to be a problem for you?" asked Harry.

"I think they'll get over it. You know them, they're not like this." said Daphne. "I think they're just reacting."

Harry sighed. Sympathy for his ex-wife was not something he thought was on the menu for today.

"Talk about it over lunch?" asked Harry.

Daphne straightened herself and nodded.

The Leaky Cauldron wasn't full, Tom seemed distracted and stopped to talk to Harry.

"So I'm thinking of selling up" said Tom, leaning on the bar.

Harry blinked, shocked, He'd been coming to the Leaky of lunch for six years.

"I'm feeling my age" said Tom, who didn't look older than he had when Harry was eleven. Though, Tom was bald and looked like a walnut. He hadn't changed though. Harry nodded, the plates of salad and fish floating slowly out of the kitchen to Harry's elbow.

"Got an offer from a couple, they wanted to do some shifts, got me thinking and they can afford it..." said Tom.

"You'll be missed, Tom."

"I'm only selling the pub, not dying" said Tom, snorting "I can engage in my hobbies"

"What are those?"

"Oh, you know, cockfighting, bear baiting, that sot of thing. Maybe a bit of shove-knut" said Tom.

Harry looked at Tom aghast.

Tom laughed "You little bugger, I got you. I'm not that old, I'm planning to travel. I hear Brazil is great".

Harry gave Tom a shake of the head and took the plates to Daphne, who was sitting at their usual table, on the side, built in.

"What was that about?" asked Daphne.

"Tom's thinking of selling the pub" said Harry.

"What made you look like you'd got mango instead of Treacle tart?" she asked.

"He conned me, saying he was going off to do cockfighting and bear-baiting."

"And you bought it" said Daphne, snorting. "Nobody does those things any more" she snickered.

"I wasn't expecting him to fool me"

Daphne rolled her eyes and started on lunch.

After a few bites, she wiped her lips with a napkin; where she'd got it from, Harry had no idea.

"Mother said I was just overreacting to the end of the contract, and that once I saw sense I'd be back home with you" said Daphne.

"We never wanted to marry each other" said Harry.

"Exactly." said Daphne.

"Father asked If you'd hurt me" she said.

Harry scoffed "As if I could" he said. Daphne pursed her lips.

"Then father said if I thought I could sow my wild oats, he would disown me."

"Who does he think he is!" said Harry "I've a good mind to go and give him a piece of my mind."

Daphne put her hand on Harry's forearm "maybe that might not be the best course of action" she said.

Harry tried to relax a bit and asked a question "Do you still have things to move?"

"I took a shrunken and expanded trunk. I've got all my clothes and effects."

"Oh" said Harry.

Daphne ate up, while Harry ate and thought.

"Look, I'll come and make my thoughts clear to your parents, if you think that would help" offered Harry.

"Well, come over for dinner tomorrow. We can discuss this all like adults" said Daphne.

Harry went back to the shop and finished repairing a table. He closed up the shop, took the takings to Gringotts, and banked them. He got a receipt, much to the annoyance of the goblin teller.

He apparated away from the steps of Gringotts, to the steps of twelve Grimmauld place.

He hadn't seen a lot of Sirius recently, only catching up on weekends. He wanted dinner, couldn't be bothered cooking, and wanted to complain to someone.

He knocked on the door.

After a really long time, a dishevelled Sirius opened the door barefoot, in trousers and an untucked shirt. "Harry!" he said, looking surprised.

"The contract finished a day ago and we signed the divorce papers yesterday." said Harry.

Sirius looked apprehensive.

"Come in, Harry" said Sirius.

After Sirius closed the door, Harry asked "What? I'm finally free and you don't even hug me?"

"Harry, you, um… you needed to come see me first" said Sirius.

"What!" said Harry angrily.

"It's a Black family matter, and I'm the head of the family" said Sirius.

"Daphne said her parents were being weird about it too, said she'd be back with me soon. As if I'd let her back after what she did!".

"Harry, you should have come to see me, and I would have approved it immediately. Next time, remember, I'm the head of the house, you have to get my blessing."

"But you'd approve anything, so why bother " said Harry, angrily.

"It's a tradition, and one that we have to stick to, or we loose credibility as the House of Black." said Sirius, looking tired.

"Ho's the quest for Lady Black going?" asked Harry.

"Fair cop Harry." said Sirius. "A lot of witches wouldn't discuss marriage or dating after they heard about you and Daphne being stuck in a contract."

"They what?"

"House Black's justifiably evil reputation"

"Which you're tying to prop up!" said Harry.

Sirius led the into the kitchen, which was a mess. Dirty dishes everywhere, bottles on the floor.

"Kreacher snuffed it" said Sirius bluntly.

Harry sat down with Sirius. "Are you going to clean up?" asked Harry.

"Think I might get a new elf." said Sirius. "I can afford one."

"So, may I have permission to divorce Daphne Greengrass" asked Harry, bitterly.

"Yes you may, Harry" said Sirius and groaned "Next time it's someone you love. This will all be normal."

Harry looked bitter at this.

"You said, Daphne did something..." asked Sirius. "If you want to tell me, I'm listening"

"Sirius, you got me into this mess by being a Black" said Harry.

"Hey, not my fault godson!" said Sirius, crossing his arms.

"Sorry" said Harry. "Still, not happy."

"I don't expect you to be" said Sirius "What did she do? Set fire to your favourite broom, rot all your clothes as she left the house, what?"

Harry sighed "This is a firewhiskey sort of conversation."

Sirius cast a quick "accio firewhiskey", and grabbed the half-full bottle that flew in from upstairs.

He poured Harry a mug full and a mug for himself. Harry looked at the dirty mug dubiously, 'the firewhiskey will kill anything' the figured. And drank. After a mug-full. Harry spoke up.

"She, um, used the marriage contract compliance clause. She made me her servant for the last two years" said Harry.

Sirius looked at Harry, his jaw dropping. "Oh crap" said Sirius, swallowing. He looked pale, thought Harry.

"I never realised she was that good at tricky old magic" said Sirius. "I mean, she's a bright witch, but… I'm really impressed. You got dark-lady'd by your ex-wife. I suppose she made you do all sorts of degrading things." said Sirius.

Harry poured another drink and swallowed it quickly, choking on the fiery liquid.

"Steady on, Harry" said Sirius.

Harry stared at the mug. He drank the firewhiskey, and sighed.

"Okay, maybe not today, Harry, but you can crash here, we'll talk some time about this"

Harry nodded.

"Harry, I have to know, in case I need to press charges, did she make you do anything?"

"No" said Harry.

Sirius looked thoughtful "So nothing like lick the floor, clean the toilet with your tongue."

"No" said Harry angrily.

"Harry, did you fight the compulsion to obey, I remember hearing you were good at throwing off Imperio..."

"She never told me to do anything.. okay!" said Harry, angrily, drinking the rest of the firewhiskey from the bottle. Harry felt floaty, detached from himself. And angry.

"What did she do, Harry?"

"She worked out about the compliance clause… that whoever used it first was in charge" said Harry.

Sirius coughed.

After staring at Harry for a long time, he stood up, and helped a wobbly Harry to bed in one of the spare rooms.

-==0==-

Harry woke up in an unfamiliar room and panicked. After sitting up and finding his glasses and wand, he realised it was an old bedroom at Grimmauld place.

Harry went to move and a stabbing pain in his head started, and he felt queasy.

Shakily, he went to the bathroom down the hall. After washing his hands, he saw a bottle of hangover-potion on the counter. He rinsed the medicine measure and wiped it out, and rinsed it again, then took a dose. It tasted foul. He put the measure down and slowly descended to the kitchen.

Sirius sat, looking no worse than yesterday…. What had he said last night, wondered Harry.

Sirius gave Harry a mug of black tea and indicated the frying pan, which was half full of a slowly congealing mess. "Have some breakfast after the potion" said Sirius, resting his head on his arms.

Twenty minutes later, Harry had eaten some fried leftovers, drunk tea and thought about going to work.

"I should go to work" said Harry.

"We need to spend some more time talking" said Sirius. "We need to go look at the original contract, in the office."

Harry shuddered "That thing, it's been nothing but a curse"

"But you got to sleep with the Greengrass girl" said Sirius.

Harry turned and stared at Sirius "We never did. Not unless I was obliviated" said Harry.

Sirius swallowed "I hadn't realised you two really didn't get on that badly."

"We had to date and marry, and we never loved each other!" yelled Harry. "How do you not understand!"

"Well, I need to see how your Daphne turned that contract on you. I didn't think that was even possible."

"I need to open the shop" said Harry sullenly.

"Well, it's a bit late for that, it's nearly twelve. I put a note on the front door. I said the shop would reopen in two days."

"Two days?"

"Today, and a day to recover from tonight" said Sirius.

"What's happening tonight?"

"We're going out." said Sirius "This afternoon, my shop-owning godson is going to help me buy a new house elf."

"I don't know anything about buying House elves" said Harry.

"You've been working with those elves of yours for years. Ask them."

Harry sighed and called out "Dobby!"

Nothing happened.

Sirius gave Harry a jaundiced eye. "And what did you expect to happen?"

"I called Dobby, he should appear"

"Not inside my house, he won't. Our house is protected against foreign house elves. Go talk to him in the front garden. There's a muggle repelling ward out there, but your little buddy

can appear.

Harry put on some shoes, borrowed a coat and went out the front door.

"Dobby"! He called.

After a while, Dobby appeared with a pop, a tea-towel over his shoulder, looking as grumpy as Harry had ever seen Dobby.

"The Great Harry Potter" said Dobby, sourly.

"Are you okay, Dobby?" asked Harry.

"Where have you been?" asked Dobby.

"Um, I went to Sirius Black's house, this one here."

"Dobby could not find Harry Potter. Mistress Daphne is missing. The manor has no wizards."

"uh, Daphne and I have divorced" said Harry.

Dobby looked at Harry and tilted his head "House elves don't do this divorce thing. Dobby thinks Harry Potter is a poor, employer."

"Dobby, about that, we'll need to go get some more furniture"

"From the Come and Go room" asked Dobby.

"Yes."

"Harry Potter or Mistress Daphne must pick out the furniture" said Dobby firmly.

"I'll sneak in in two days Dobby, I'm doing things today and tomorrow" said Harry.

Dobby folded his arms "And what are Winky and Dobby supposed to do till then. No wizards, no work, nothing to do."

"Um, my godfather Sirius Black is looking for a new elf" said Harry.

Dobby paled and shook his head vigorously "The Blacks are bad masters. The elf Kreacher is a bully and a bad elf."

"Kreacher is dead" said Harry.

Dobby started "Kreacher dieded." Dobby nodded. "Good news for Dobby."

"So do you or Winky know of an elf Sirius could buy?"

"Dobby does not sell elflings" said Dobby, suddenly looking feral.

"I wasn't talking about your elflings, Dobby, honestly, just, I know house elves all know each other, maybe there's an elf who needs a new master."

Dobby muttered something.

"Dobby will ask Winky." said Dobby.

"Dobby, would you and Winky take a cleaning contract for this house, just a day, for payment?"

Dobby looked at the house and shook his head "Dobby's not going in there. Dobby couldn't pop out. Dobby is a free elf. Dobby's not going back in a prison."

Harry nodded "Okay Dobby, see you at the shop in two days" said Harry.

"Dobby and Winky be there for paying work" said Dobby, and popped off.

Harry went back inside.

Hours later, after a fruitless trip to the house-elf relocation office, Harry and Sirius went back to Grimmauld place.

"Well, Harry, come back in tidy muggle clothes."

"Are we going out to eat"

"In a manner" said Sirius,

"What are we having?"

"Curry" said Sirius.

"But I don't feel like Curry" said Harry.

"You will" said Sirius, going upstairs.

-==0==-

Sirius side-along apparated Harry into a dingy dark alleyway.

"Where are we going?"

"To get you some therapy" said Sirius, with a small smile.

Harry was dragged along the alley, around the corner and into a dark back street. Parked vehicles crowded the narrow street. Sirius led Harry along the street to a dingy building with a flickering sign. "Live Show" it said.

"Come on" said Sirius and dragged Harry inside.

Just inside the door, a large man in a badly fitting suit eyeballed Harry and Sirius, and nodded after Sirius gave him two tenners.

Sirius took Harry through another door into big dark room, where rock music played with a loud bass beat.

"Oh, a club" said Harry.

Sirius nodded. "We need a wee drink" said Sirius hand went to the bar that ran the width of the room. Sirius waved , gave the not terribly busy bartender a twenty, and got a couple of glasses of something with ice.

"Sip this" said Sirius, taking Harry to a chair, close to a stage. The other tables were evenly split between groups of men and single men, watching the stage intently.

Harry's mind stopped, and so did his feet.

On the stage, a young woman was taking off her clothes in time to the music.

"Urk" said Harry.

Sirius pulled Harry over and into a chair, where he sat, watching as the brunette took off her shirt, threw away her skirt and pranced up and down the long stage in her underwear. Her very skimpy underwear.

"Don't worry, she'll take that off in time" said Sirius.

A hard to remember number of drinks later, six different dancers having stripped, Sirius asked Harry "So, what do you think"

"I've seen better" said Harry immediately, remembering Daphne in a short towel, rushing from the bathroom to her room. In five years, you see a lot of towel-clad wife, or even unclad wife even if you don't sleep together. They only had the one bathroom on their floor, after all.

"Oh you've been to a club before?" asked Sirius.

"Nah, Daphne's got a better arse than that one" said Harry, drunkenly.

Sirius snorted. "But you haven't seen her naked."

Harry coughed "One bathroom, five years. I've seen her a few times" he said.

Sirius laughed. "Well, feast your eyes on this lot, cos we're here all night, and you're getting a surprise later."

"If it's a marriage contract, I swear I will boil you blood and use your bones on my roses" said Harry stiffly.

"Oh no, Harry, nothing you can't get away from" said Sirius, laughing.

Five drinks later, the first girl to use the pole at the end of the stage danced away, naked.

"Uhhhh" said Harry.

"Isn't it great" said Sirius.

"Well, I won't sleep well tonight" said Harry.

"Oh Harry, have faith. I've got you sorted." said Sirius.

The music got louder and strobing colour lights started flashing on the stage.

"Ah we got to the main event" said Sirius.

"What was all that?"

"The warm-up acts" said Sirius. "Prepare to be amazed."

A young woman stepped out of the curtains at the end of the stage and started to dance down the stage. She was wearing a schoolgirls uniform, like the ones Harry remembered the senior school in Little Winging wearing, well, sort of like it, the skirt was so short Harry thought he could already see her backside, and the shirt was ludicrously tight, a striped tie over it. She had a blazer on that she quickly discarded. Harry goggled. The young woman had an unbelievable bust.

Once she took off her shirt, Harry was paralysed. Her bra held a pair of breasts so large they defied the imagination. 'The size of quaffles' he thought.

By the end of her strip-tease, Harry was reeling. How was it possible for breasts to be so big.

"Plastic" said Sirius. "Muggle doctors put balloons of water in. Isn't it amazing!"

"Amazing" said Harry, watching as the woman's perky ass left through the curtains.

"So how d you feel about Daphne now?" asked Sirius.

Harry groaned "I'm not sleeping well tonight" he said.

"Just follow me, godson" said Sirius, and led Harry over to a darkened doorway at the stage end of the room.

Sirius handed a wad of money to an older woman who stood inside the darkened doorway, and she led Harry along a dimly lit corridor to a sequined door. "Party room, already paid by your godfather. Don't pay the girl" said the older woman and opened the door, almost pushing Harry in.

The room had a private bar, some couches and a tiny stage. Harry was wondering what the point was when a young woman in a cocktail dress stepped in. Harry gulped. The woman had huge breasts, and perky behind, the dress was slit up to her thigh.

The woman smiled at Harry "Well, sit down, and I'll dance for you" she said. "No touching me."

"Uhuh" said Harry, collapsing onto a couch.

The young woman turned on some music and dance on the tiny stage, her odd high heels making her movements stiff.

"So, you want a lap dance?" asked the woman.

"A what?" asked Harry.

Of you sit over on that chair, and I dance on your lap." sad the woman, turning her back and undulating her behind. Harry gulped. The girl looked at Harry sharply "Cheating on your wife?" she asked suddenly in a sharp tone.

Harry felt confused. "What" he asked.

"Your wedding rings a bit bloody obvious" said the woman.

"Oh, that" said Harry "Got divorced yesterday." he said.

"So that your dad paid for this, that's a bit sick" said the woman.

"My godfather" said Harry. The woman laughed "Oh that brilliant. He's really corrupting you."

She crooked a finger at Harry "Get your ass on the chair and mine will take your mind off your ex."

Harry got up, and embarrassed by his erection, sat in the chair. "No grabbing" said the woman, and lowered her ass onto Harry's lap and started to gyrate.

"Ulp" said Harry swallowing.

"Oh you're tense" she said, rocking back and forth.

"I've never done any of this" said Harry nervously.

"But you were married" she said, grinding when she said married.

"It was arranged. We didn't want to marry. After five years we could divorce" said Harry.

The woman turned her head and stared at Harry "No way, one of you lot coming here?" she said, rubbing Harry's crotch with her backside.

"I'm sure I don't know what you mean" said Harry, losing the ability to make long sentences.

"Aristocrats here, what are you, the prince of Demarks' little brother?" she asked.

"I've never seen you in the magazines, so you're not... like the real royal family or nothing. Wow, an arranged marriage."

"It was crap" said Harry.

The rubbing finally broke Harry's self control and he groaned. "Oh shit" he said and groaned.

The woman stopped and got off Harry. "Well, that was quick" she said. "No wonder she divorced you"

Harry looked up from his self-loathing and wondered what to do.

"You're in luck though, because your godfather bought the full package" said the woman, reaching up under her hair to undo her the neck band of her dress.

Harry stoop up awkwardly, got out his wallet and gave the woman the cash he had "Here, just say I did everything" said Harry, leaving the room.

Sirius collected Harry from the doorway and took him outside and back to the alleyway.

"You alright?" asked Sirius.

"evanesco" cast Harry. Sirius chuckled "Oh, like that eh."

"What are we doing now?" asked Harry.

"Curry"

-==0==-

Harry woke up, hung over as hell.

The potion helped.

Harry picked his way through the mess into breakfast.

Much later, Sirius Dragged a still bleary Harry into the study and sat down with Harry and the original of the contract. It smelled of mouldy parchment.

Sirius read through if for awhile an then looked at Harry "Harry, read this."

"Sirius, I swear if I have to marry someone again, I'm going to start cursing people."

"Just read this" said Sirius.

'Whereas the party of the first part, to whit, the groom, once bound in matrimony with the part of the second part, to whit, the bride, may be denied by the bride, the party of the first part may press control upon the party of the second part, such that will ensure the compliance with the stated commands of the party of the first part, such that the party of the second part me controlled by the party of the first part."

"Yeah" said Harry. "So if I'd commanded Daphne before she commanded me, I'd be controlled"

Sirius sighed "Harry, there is no reciprocal clause. The Wizard can command the witch. Whatever Daphne did is very clever."

Harry shrugged "She probably jiggered the magic of the contract. She's really good at old magic."

"And she works for the DMLE in records?" asked Sirius. "Because I never saw her there."

Harry looked at his godfather "I can't tell you" said Harry.

Sirius shook his head "Next thing you'll be telling me she's a bloody unspeakable, and you're some kind of magical superhero."

Harry laughed "Not bloody likely. I run an antique shop."

"I never did work out where do you get all you stock from" said Sirius.

"Er" said Harry.

"Harry, are you robbing houses?" asked Sirius.

"No, it's just, well, there's this room at Hogwarts, full of all the lost things, and the house elves and students put broken furniture in there, and well, we've been mining the piles of junk for six years"

"You what?" said Sirius, shocked.

"My friend Dobby and his partner move it to the shop, I fix it and then we sell it. Small profits on shoes and stuff, but tables sell well."

"You bloody genius. How did you find the room, we never found anything like that"

"I asked an elf the right question" said Harry. "The business was Daphne's idea."

"She… wow. If she was older I'd court her. She's bloody brilliant."

Harry looked at Sirius "Repeat that Idea ever again and I will end you" said Harry coldly.

"So getting under another girl didn't get you over her?" asked Sirius.

"I am Not missing her." said Harry. The next instant, he looked at his watch "I'm nearly late for dinner at Daphne's parents. I'm giving them a piece of my mind."

"No you're not" said Sirius.

"What?"

"You're not visiting them. you're grounded."

"You can't ground me I'm an adult"

"I can because I'm your head of house. The Greengrasses have had six years of being important for being the parents of your wife. No wonder they want her to come back to you. The bit where you inherit everything from Potter and Black, and she inherits all the Greengrass wealth, does that even register. You two were going to be as rich as the Malfoys."

Harry blinked "What? As rich as those bastards?"

"They made their money by marrying it, and lost a lot when old Lucy got busted and went to Azkaban." said Sirius.

"I was really going to be richer then Draco Malfoy?" asked Harry, surprised.

"Potter-Black-Greengrass was going to be the next big dynasty." said Sirius.

"But we're divorced now" said Harry.

"Well, that's the other thing."

"I sweat on my fucking Magic, If I get one more fucking contract or something, I'm going to start using entail expelling curses" said Harry.

"Nothing like that Harry." said Sirius. "It's just that you've broken your marriage vows."

"I'm not married anymore." said Harry bitterly.

"Did you say that in your vows?"

"Well, no" said Harry "We were hardly going to say 'To the end of days, or till I can get a divorce.'"

"Well, now you're known as someone who goes back on a non-binding vow." said Sirius.

"Huh?"

"So people are going to want binding magical contracts with you from now on, you're officially a slippery character." said Sirius

"Oh fuck all of this" said Harry. "Considering what I've done…. I'm going to go lean on some powerful people who owe me an awful lot."

"Harry, the most you've done is sell reasonably priced antiques, which it appears you didn't exactly pay for."

"Sirius, you know how Voldemort stopped attacking people after my fourth year" said Harry.

"I figure he got tired of it and retired somewhere warm" said Sirius.

"I killed him" said Harry. "Not at the time, but put him out of action, and killed him a few months back."

Sirius laughed "Good one Harry" he said.

Harry took out his wand and said "I swear on my life and my magic that I have defeated Lord Voldemort, and helped kill him."

Sirius startled "Careful, you do that properly and that's an unbreakable…."

Sirius stared at Harry "Harry… did you really."

"Yeah. The gun really helped."

"Moony took it to go hunt werewolves. The wizard ones can't make it not fire" said Sirius.

"Well it was certainly my lucky gun" said Harry.

"So who helped?"

"The Department of Mysteries" said Harry. Harry tried to say something else and his tongue flapped and his neck choked up.

"Can't say that bit" said Harry.

"Your ex wife, I presume" said Sirius "She's one of them."

Harry rolled his eyes.

"I still can't see how she did the contract" said Sirius. "Tell me exactly she said and did."

Harry repeated Daphne's fateful words.

Sirius stared at the ceiling for along time, then snorted. "Oh hell" said Sirius.

"What?" asked Harry, even more irritated.

"You've been pranked, by a master. I've half a mind to order you to re-marry her."

"You try that, and you'll have half a mind when I'm done" said Harry.

"She, well, she didn't exactly turn the contract around Harry."

"So what did she do?" asked Harry.

"She bullshitted you." said Sirius. "Told you that you were under control and couldn't talk about it. After the fiasco with the goblet of fire, you'd believe someone who told you you were under control of a contract."

"Why did she do it?"

"She told you, and it's right in the contract. You could just tell her, 'Well, time to ride Harry's broomstick' and she'd be forced by the contract to do it."

"But I wouldn't..." said Harry.

"She' pretty good looking… any man'd be tempted to say "Well, it's blowjob night.""

Harry blushed. "I … couldn't do that."

"I should have got more corrupting in before you got married" said Sirius, shaking his head.

And what's with saying I have to remarry her?"

"A prank that fabulous, and the business … She's a marvel. A devious, sneaky, manipulative, pretty marvel."

Harry felt oddly proud of the praise to Daphne.

"So Harry, when my Cousin Bellatrix was married to that LeStrange halfwit, she wasn't inclined, if you get what I mean. He used the contract and she went mad."

"Mad Eye says she was a murderous bitch before she was married" said Harry.

"Well, she was a Black, and a right murderous one." said Sirius "A lot of my family were murderous assholes. It's why you can't apparate into the house. Come to think of it, my mother would approve of Daphne, pureblood, manipulative, devious."

"Well I'm going to go pull on the Department's chain" said Harry bitterly.

"Start by using them to verify yourself with the minister."

-==0==-

Harry didn't really expect the Ministry to cave so quickly.

Within a week, the first official press release came out. Harry would have been happier if it hadn't said.

'Husband and Wife team defeat Dark Lord. Potters defeat dark lord that killed Harry Potter's parents.'

A week later, after a succession of increasingly curt letters, Harry arrived at the Greengrass house for dinner, dressed in formal robes.

He was hustled in by their house elf, and found himself sitting at the dinner table opposite his ex-wife, and beside her mother. Her father sat at the head of the table.

There were no other guests.

Harry was polite. Daphne was silent.

Daphne's mother started to talk Harry and Daphne remarrying.

"Stop." said Harry bluntly.

Daphne's father, Cyrus glared at Harry.

"We were forced to marry by a cursed contract. We never loved each other, or even liked each other" said Harry.

Daphne nodded.

"So we will not be repeating that mistake" said Harry.

Daphne nodded. "He's a prat" she said. "And he never would have lasted a week in Slytherin."

Harry scowled. "And Sirius explained your little scam, Missy!" said Harry.

Daphne flushed, then calmed herself. "I'm sure I don't know what you mean" she said, smirking.

"You bloody bullshitter." said Harry "You spun a line about having taken control of the contract."

"And you were so dumb you brought it" said Daphne. "I kept myself safe, all it took was to play off your history of getting stuck in magical contracts."

"You're an awful person. I thought I was a slave for two years" said Harry.

"Enslaved by my intelligence" said Daphne.

"As if I would order you to commit indecency" said Harry, blushing and changing the topic.

Daphne's Parents stared at the exchange in disbelief.

"What, daughter, is Potter talking about" said Cyrus.

"I told Potter that he was my servant, and that the contract allowed whichever party first exercised the control, to control the other. He brought the story, and thus didn't use the contract-granted power to force me to do anything he ordered me to" said Daphne, proudly.

Cyrus choked. "I assumed Potter had already used the contract to ruin you" he said.

"He has never touched me in that way" said Daphne huffily.

"Oh, is he gay" asked Salome, Daphne's mother.

"Just repressed" said Daphne.

Harry's mouth hung open.

Cyrus spoke up "I don't suppose you'd be interested in getting engaged to Daphne? She's too old to come out as a debutante, bad tempered, and has her own career. I believe you already know most of her bad habits, and she's rather deceitful, but you were a good influence on her, her Grades rocketed up once you were engaged."

"Hardly" said Daphne "I had to get better marks than his Muggle girlfriend Granger. Or at least close, or she'd sneer at me."

"Hermione and I were not a couple."

"She wished you were" said Daphne. "Then had to settle for Weasley."

"Hardly a glowing recommendation of either of you" said Harry drily.

"Well everyone has seen the way you two dance, with your eyes closed. You're such pair of lovebirds" said Salome.

Harry snapped "So we can pretend we're dancing with someone we love!"

"What the idiot said" said Daphne crossly.

Salome pulled out her wand and cast a long complicated spell. As she finished, a white mist shot out of her wand, and hit Daphne. The mist stuck to Daphne's head and stretched into a long tendril that stuck to Harry's head.

"What the hell is this" asked Harry.

"A simple divination tool. As you can see, Daphne's heart belongs to you, whether she admits it or not."

"I certainly do not!" said Daphne, red-faced, and furious 'The bloody potion keeps going off, and coincidentally smells like Potter'" she said. Harry choked.

Salome cast the spell again, this time hitting Harry with the misty blob. The tendril lengthened and touched Daphne's head, but the two tendrils repelled each other, spiralling around each other, strange helices of magic, anchored to the same places, but repelled from each other.

"That is unexpected" said Salome, as the mist from the first spell started to dissipate.

"What the hell was that supposed to mean" said Daphne.

"Well, Harry's heart belongs to you, and yours to Harry, but… the lines should have joined. Not avoided each other."

Cyrus spoke up "So he loves her, and she loves him but they don't love each other?"

"It shouldn't be possible" said Salome.

Harry couldn't take it anymore. He pulled out his wand and cast a finite on the tendril. It faded immediately.

"Well this has been irritating and humiliating" said Harry. Daphne glared at him, her face frozen in an icy glare. "Don't you dare" she said.

"I don't know what weird pureblood matchmaking scheme you had in mind for tonight, but I'm fed up. Your daughter has numerous good qualities, and I commend her to whoever can stand her."

"You liar" said Daphne. "You pretended not to love me!"

"You frigid bitch" said Harry.

"Hah!" said Daphne "I can cast a silencing charm, maybe you could learn one for when you're in the toilet wanking!"

"Bitch" retorted Harry.

Harry stormed out, a feeling of righteous satisfaction in his heart. He'd told them.

-==0==-

Purely for health reasons, he took Dreamless Sleep potion.

After a month, he started to get mouth ulcers.

His healer told him to stop taking them, and referred him to St Mungos, where they gave him a foul-tasting potion.

He woke up two days later feeling sad, but not crying.

-==0==-

Harry went to the Burrow that Sunday to catch up with Ron.

The place was in an uproar.

"Ginny's been badly injured in a Quidditch match" explained a teary Ron "They think she might not make it."

A teary Arthur Weasley explains that Ginny was hit by a bludger and fell off her broom, hitting her head on the goal-ring on the way down. The healers say she has massive brain injuries and may not ever be the same, if she recovers.

Harry comes around next Sunday to the Burrow for dinner, and meets a pale, wan, Ginny Weasley. At the sight of Harry she blushes. 'Oh god not again' thinks Harry.

Ginny Weasley speaks up "Oh I'm so embarrassed, You're Harry Potter, aren't you?"

Harry smiles "Yeah… we went to school together."

Ginny looked a bit lost "I don't remember much before last week" she said "It's all a bit patchy. I played professional Quidditch, so Mum tells me."

Harry took a deep breath. This was weird. This woman was Ginny Weasley, but she didn't remember almost anything.

"Were we friends?" asked Ginny.

"Um, I had a magical marriage contract for years, while I was at school. I had a lot of problems as a result"

"Oh Merlin that sounds terrible!" said Ginny. "How ever did you escape?"

"How do you know I escaped?"

"Mum told me, did you really defeat you-know-who?" she asked.

"Yeah, but I can't talk about it, and it wasn't some big heroic thing" said Harry.

"Oh, so like my life, some things that are magical aren't great" said Ginny.

Harry felt irritated by Ginny's mopeyness "Look, you had a really bad accident, and you've forgotten a lot. But you're alive, and you can make choices."

Ginny looked at Harry sharply, and for a second, the red terror that had been Ginny Weasley was back. "You're the first person to snap at me. Everyone treats me with kid gloves."

"They're your family, they're scared. You nearly died."

"I'm fine now. The healers say I can't fly a broom; though I don't want to. They… they scare me" said Ginny.

"I feel the same way about my ex-wife" said Harry bitterly.

"Harry Potter, the boy who lived, is scared of his ex-wife?" said Ginny, pointedly.

"I have a secondhand store. My NEWTs are nothing special. I'm not some big hero."

"Well you're certainly not big" said Ginny drily. "Perhaps you ex-wife has something to say about that"

Harry flushed "We hated each other. We never… we had to kiss, because of a cursed marriage contract."

"Oh my gosh" said Ginny. "How long did this last?"

"Five years married, two years engaged before that."

"Why?"

"It was just bad luck. There was an old contract between the House of Black and Greengrass, and we both fit the contract, so it activated."

"That sounds very improbable" said Ginny.

"It's happened twice to me" said Harry. "I have the worst luck."

"Well shoo" said Ginny, making shooing motions "In case a meteor falls on you or something."

Ginny Weasley's not the girl she was, but Harry finds her soothing and dates her. She's polite, remembers little of her life before the accident, but loves Harry intensely. She's a bit, well, odd about some things, but Harry's had five years of angry Slytherin. Compared to that, a woman with a patchy memory is and occasional obsessions is no issue. Puffskeins are fine.

Harry turns up at the burrow with a broom one day and Ginny shrinks away from him, eyes wide. "Keep that away from me" she says, shuddering.

Harry's brain strips several gears, trying to reconcile Quidditch playing Ginny with terrified of brooms Ginny… and realises she must remember some of almost dying on the field. He resolves not to show her a broom again anytime soon.

Harry Potter married Ginerva Molly Weasley on March 17, 2004.

In November 2004, Ginny and Harry have a baby boy, who Harry calls James Sirius.

He's a cute baby, with messy brown hair and hazel eyes.

In November 2005, Albus Fleamont Potter was born. Ginny and her mother chose his first name.

He has black hair and green eyes. Harry calls him Al.

Harry reads in the Prophet one day, while he's sitting at the shop that Draco Malfoy's wife, Astoria Malfoy nee Greengrass given birth to Scorpius Malfoy. Harry shakes his head, Scorpius, what a name. She seemed nice enough, apart from having terrible taste in men.

Ron and Hermione have a baby girl called Rose. Ginny draws Rose heart Albus on a napkin "They're cousins" hissed Harry.

"It's okay Harry. We're pure-bloods" said Ginny.

In 2008, Harry and Ginny have a baby girl, who they name Lily Luna. She has red hair and dark chocolate eyes like her mother. Harry thinks she might be the cutest thing he's ever seen.

September 1st 2017. It's nineteen years since Harry married you-know-who, as he now thinks of her. He's pushing Albus's trunk trolley, James is pushing his own, and Ginny's holding Lily's hand.

Albus look up at Harry "Dad, what if I don't get sorted into Gryffindor?" he asks, nervously.

"Al, the hat wanted to put me in Slytherin. You go wherever you go, and we'll still love you. Your brother, well he's your older brother, so he'll shove you around anyway" said Harry, relaxed as usual.

Harry saw in the distance Draco Malfoy and Astoria putting their son on the train. The boy looked like a typical little Malfoy.

When his son writes in a letter that not only was he sorted into Slytherin, but is best friends with Scorpious Malfoy, Ginny is not pleased. Harry doesn't think it matters.

On the 1st September 2019, Harry noticed a tearful Draco Malfoy putting his son on the train alone.

Lily was very excited to get on the train. But wouldn't let her mum's hand go.

After Lily finally got on the train, Harry asked Ginny "Ginny, did the Malfoys divorce?"

"Harry, didn't you see it in the paper, Astoria died in August. Some sort of family curse." said Ginny idly.

Harry felt sick to his stomach. He hated family curses, and cursed contracts. Astoria had been nice. Compared to her sister… He'd liked Astoria.

Harry's working on furniture at the shop one evening.. It's soothing. Someone knocks on the shop door. Harry walks to the door and opens it "We're closed" he says.

Hermione Weasley, Minister for Magic stands there "Hi Harry" she says.

"Oh Minister" says Harry. "Is this an official visit?"

Hermione rolls her eyes "I'd like a cup of tea" she says.

Harry lets Hermione into the shop and takes her to the back room and makes her tea.

"I just need to talk to someone, off the record" says Hermione.

"Well here we are" said Harry.

Hermione talks and talks. Harry makes her a cup of tea.

"Harry, why didn't you become an Auror" she finally asks.

"Got sick of fighting before I finished school. After I killed Voldemort" Harry stopped "I should not have said that" he said.

Hermione gets up off Harry's chair and gives Harry a hug. "You did it?" she asked.

"Years ago. I was still married to Daphne Greengrass at the time. I can't speak of many mysterious details, if you get my drift" he said.

Hermione laughed and kissed Harry. On the lips. And suddenly Harry and Hermione were snogging, and Harry didn't care. There was a fire in his heart that hadn't been there, since… well Harry wasn't thinking about that day.

"I've always loved you" she admits tearfully.

Harry divorces Ginny and the next year, marries Hermione. His children take it poorly.

James is growing up to be a bit of a prat, observes Harry. James angrily says that his dad's a loser who runs an antique store. Harry's been crucioed by the dark lord, but his sons words leave him sad.

He can never tell his angry son that he did great things. Maybe, James just needs to grow up. James becomes an Auror after Hogwarts. Harry is proud and disappointed at the same time.

James comes to see him, twenty years later, looking tired.

"I'm sorry dad" he says, by way of introduction.

"Baby not letting you sleep?" asked Harry.

"Yeah"

"Hard to keep up at work"

"Yeah, how did you ever bring up us three?" asked James.

"Compared to killing men, bringing you lot up was hard" said Harry.

"Dad, you never..."

"About six or seven, all before I finished school. My first one in first year" said Harry "He was possessed by lord Voldemort".

James is ashen "Bloody Hell!" he cries.

"So after school, I decided to have a quiet life" said Harry.

"Why did you marry your first wife?"

Harry laughed "Got stuck in a magical marriage contract. Had to marry her. She was a very Slytherin witch. We fought like cats and dogs. The contract expired after five years and no children. Daphne Greengrass, works in DMLE."

James looked at Harry "No she doesn't" said James firmly. "I had to go over the payroll records as a trainee Auror. The sort of terrible paperwork job they give the newbies."

"I can't speak of what mysterious things she does" said Harry, winking.

"Crap" said James, eyes widening.

"My first ex-wife is a hell of woman" said Harry, wryly.

"So why did you marry mum?"

"She was nothing like my ex" said Harry. "And she loved me"

Years pass.

Harry Potter stands, cold and wet at his wife's Grave. She was only seventy-nine. Ron calls to him "Come on Harry, we're getting wet and there's a wake over in the hall."

"I'm sorry Ron" cries Harry.

"She always did like you better" said Ron philosophically.

Harry walks over to the church hall and goes and sits down at the wake, There are a lot of young people, and only a few his age. Ron goes to eat. He's spherical in the middle these days.

Rose married Scorpius Malfoy, and he's there, holding her hand. Maybe he's not such a bad kid. James nods to him, and goes off to wrangle some of Harry's grand-kids.

The wake rolls on, and Harry drifts off into reverie for a bit.

"Potter!" says a voice and His heart pounds. It's her. Greengrass. His first wife. She looks annoyingly good. She's gone grey, has some lines, but still looks like the woman he married.

He's had decades to get over it, and wants to talk to someone his own age.

She sits down at a chair near him, with a cup of tea (undoubtedly with two sugars) and they talk.

They swap stories of who's still alive, who got married, divorced, whose children married who.

Harry feels slightly less dead inside. Catching up with his age group is kind of fun, even if he had to bury his wife to get a party to do it at.

A month later, his doorbell rings. It's her.

August 3rd, 2060, 63 years to the day later, Harry Potter married Daphne Greengrass for the second time. They kiss briefly, and grin at the small group of friends and family

"This time for real" says Daphne.

August 4th 2060, Harry Potter wakes up in bed with his wife. 'Wow' he thinks. 'Should have been nicer to her first time around.'

February 28th, 2125. Harry Potter dies in his sleep. His funeral four days later is a quiet affair. He was known mostly as an antique shop owner, almost as old as what he sold. His wife, Daphne Potter nee Greengrass, stands crying at the graveside until her step-children take her away to the wake.

Daphne Potter takes a week off work to cry. And plot, because she went to Slytherin, dammit.

She heads back to the Ministry on a Monday. The security guard greets her "Mrs P" he nods. The elderly witch, her face haggard, her blue eyes red lined, nods "Meeks" she says.

Bill Meeks watches the old witch enter the lift. She's a nice old lady, sad that her husband died. He was the old guy that ran the antique shop in Diagon alley. She does filing down in the bowels of the DMLE, Bill knows. Nice old girl. Bit harmless, for all that she's got a sharp tongue. His Dad told him once that she used to be a real dragon, then she got married late in life and mellowed out.

Daphne Greengrass exits the lift on level eight and walks down the black corridor to the Department of Mysteries. She waves her hands and her robes transform into the grey uniform of an unspeakable. She pulls up the silver trimmed hood and the shadow of the hood makes her face disappear.

Her hands, gloved now, wave at the door, and it opens.

She hasn't needed to use a wand to do this for sixty years.

She walks into the circular room, clicks her fingers and the room spins. She walks slowly to the door right in front of her and enters the Time room. She pulls her wand and elegantly casts 'colloportus' on the door. Two more quick flicks and all the doors into the room are locked.

She walks to a shelf holding time-turners and taps the wall behind the shelf three times with her wand. A doorway forms and the shelves swing past her. She walks up the shallow staircase to a large room, shrouded in darkness. There is a large brass control panel on a plinth, and she approaches it and sighs.

The control panel has five great big keyholes to stop unauthorised use. Not that it can ever be authorised, as there would have to be an Apocalypse of this thing to be allowed to be used. Daphne doesn't care, because the only man she ever loved is dead, and she's going to get back the time she should have had, and if that means destroying the timeline, well, let it die.

The interlocks were made by the best and brightest of the Department of Mysteries. Unfortunately for the Department, Daphne was the Director Emeritus of the Department, and had been breaking rules since she was fifteen. She took some of the hundred and ten years of magical knowledge, and a muggle pocketknife and an hour later had defeated all the interlocks.

"Really should teach the kiddies how to break into things some time" she muttered.

She stood up, groaned and walked stiffly a very long way along a catwalk in the darkness to a hinged metal egg the size of a person. She opened the egg, put in a letter; she wasn't stupid enough to get in, and walked achingly back to the machine's control panel.

The time dials she set to 1994, just days after Harry would defeat Voldemort. Three in the afternoon should do it.

The location setting used a globe and a pointer. She cranked the wheels and slowly zeroed in on her parents house. She swung in the first, smallest magnifying glass and cranked the smaller wheels, to zero in on her room, in her parents house. After three more magnifying glasses, so huge she could see distances of feet on the globe, she was fairly sure it was set to put the letter on her bed.

With a sad smile, she pulled the large lever that with any luck at all, would cause her to cease to exist.

[AN: corrections by alix33, as usual]

[AN2: Next Chapter is in the works.. and no misery!]


	3. Chapter 3

**Harry Potter and the Rigged Marriage Contract**

HP AU [HP/DG]

_If you weren't reading __the last chapter(s)__… Harry's __killed Peter Pettigrew, __somewhat vanquished __V__oldemort __in the graveyard with a lot of help from Cedric Diggory__, __killed the fake Mad-Eye moody, been freed forever from Dursleys by a freed Sirius Black, handed back the gun Sirius gave him, then __avoided death by __accidental arranged __marriage to Delphini Riddle, and gone home to Grim__m__auld place._

_Harry's betrothal contract with Delphini Riddle showed up as an extra face on the magical family tree with a line linking Delphini Riddle to Harry. There were of course lines up the family tree showing her parentage. Tom Riddle finally made into a real pure-blood family tree. Briefly._

_Then Harry was a terrible five years, and eventually marries someone he likes, gets divorced, marries someone else he likes, she dies, and then finally marries someone he thought he didn't like, and lives forty plus years very happy. Then his last widow destroys the space-time continuum…. So this is a redo-fic (cough) (Letter from the future) (cough). And an excuse to once again rehash this story. _

_Contains rude words, and adult scenes. Rated M.(though hardly super explicit)_

_Thanks to JK Rowling and her publishers etc.. for allowing fanfic._

* * *

**[AN: this is not a typo. Welcome back to 1994, Harry and Sirius have just escaped Delphini Riddles marriage contract. Again, or just the once?]**

**Grimmauld place, kitchen.**

Sirius Black sits down at the kitchen table and admires his leather jacket on the back of the kitchen door.

Harry heads off upstairs.

"Where are you going Harry?" asked Sirius, chasing Harry.

"Just going to check the family tree. Just to be sure." said Harry.

"Fine, my paranoid godson." said Sirius, who liked chasing things.

Harry enters the room with the family tree and heads for his own section.

Harry and Sirius bend down and look at Harry's face on the family tree that covers the walls of the whole room. "Fuck… there's still a girl there linked to my name" said Harry. "I'm still in a marriage contract!"

"Lumos" said Sirius, squatting slowly.

"I still can hardly see.. still a witch D something"

"Lumos" repeated Sirius.

"Who the hell is Daphne Greengrass?" asked Harry. 'And why am I in a marriage contract with her.' he thought

Sirius snorted "The Greengrasses are in the sacred twenty eight and she's born in 1980, like you. She's at Hogwarts with you" said Sirius certainly.

"How do you know all that?" said Harry, noting the year of birth on Daphne's name-rectangle-thingy.

"Harry, there are only twenty eight names in the sacred twenty eight. It's easy." said Sirius.

"Sirius, I solemnly swear, I've never heard of her" said Harry.

Sirius snorted. "Well, she's not a bastard, or a halfblood" said Sirius, tracking upwards. "Her mother's an Abbot."

Silence.  
"Sirius, can I have the gun back, so I can shoot myself?" asked Harry.

"Harry," Sirius squinted at the painting "She looks alright" he said.

"This is not happening" said Harry, shaking his head.

"Harry, you probably don't have to marry her" said Sirius.

"What?"

"We'll find the Potter family rules, I'll un-adopt you, you'll be fine"

"Sirius, that sounds like a load of bull"

"I Was trying to make you feel better" said Sirius.

"So I go from having Voldemort try to kill me, to having to marry some girl I've never met." cried Harry.

"Harry, you've met her, you might not have ever noticed her, or talked to her, but she was at the same sorting as you" said Sirius.

"Well she's not in Griffindor"

"Well of course not"

"What do you mean?"

"The hats tell you the house people were in at Hogwarts" said Sirius.

"But her hat is silver"

"Yeah, well, that explains why you haven't talked to her." said Sirius.

"Huh"

"Harry, look at most of the Blacks. What colour are their hats"

"Umm…. Silver"

"Slytherin" said Sirius.

"I'm dead. A witch from Slytherin, forced to marry me… I'm a dead man" moaned Harry.

"No Harry, you'll just be dead on the inside" said Sirius, cheerfully. "Like all your Black forebears"

...

"Harry, you can talk to snakes, right" asked Sirius

"Yeah"

"Problem solved. Use snake speech on her" said Sirius.

"Asshole" said Harry sulkily.

...

"We need to deal with this, write her family a letter"

"I'm fourteen" cried Harry.

"And you're an adult at seventeen, so you only have three years to get to know her."

-==0==-

**The kitchen, that afternoon **

"Come on Harry, we're going shopping you need clothes that fit."

"You're going to buy me clothes?"

"Well, you're too small for mine, and I'm wearing them"

"Sirius, thanks"

"Don't thank me, this is going to take ages" said Sirius.

-==0==-

**Back at Grimmauld place, later.**

"Sirius, why is your house filthy and full of magical pests"

"Because my mother died and left it for ten years"

"I'm sorry"

"Don't be, she was an horrible woman, who supported Voldemort"

"No, I'm sorry it's disgusting." explained Harry.

"Well, we could hire some cleaners, I suppose" said Sirius.

"Sirius, I'm really upset about the marriage contract stuff"

"It is awful, but we're Blacks. Show some stiff upper lip."

"I'm fourteen and forced to marry Sirius, I'm very sad" said Harry.

"And I know about the contracts Black uses Harry, I'll do all I can to help you, and if all else fails, I'll give you a bottle of Amortentia."

-==0==-

**The Leaky Cauldron, the back room.**

Sirius and Harry walk in, the door is marked "Private function"

There's a family sitting, waiting.

Harry sees a blonde mother, a blonde daughter… That must be Daphne. She has blue eyes, and an calm face. She's actually… seriously pretty. Harry feels more nervous than ever.

"Lord Black, Mister Potter" says the father, standing up. He's dark haired, like the younger daughter, who seems excited.

"Lord Greengrass" says Sirius, nodding.

"My wife Salome" she nods.

"My daughter Daphne," Daphne stares at Harry, and then she winks.

'What the fuck' thought Harry. 'She winked at me'

"My youngest, Astoria." Astoria seems highly amused and grins.

"I think everyone knows Me, and Harry's more famous than I am" said Sirius.

Mrs Greengrass frowns.

Harry tries to do the thing they rehearsed "Lord Greengrass, Lady Greengrass, Daphne, Astoria" he nods to them all.

"Please, call me Gary" says Lord Greengrass.

Astoria titters briefly.

Salome Greengrass elbows her husband "Cyrus, call me Cyrus" says Cyrus.

Harry can't help it, and he snorts. Salome and Daphne and Astoria all look like they've heard Cyrus make a joke like this before, and have ceased to find it funny.

Cyrus waves them down and they sit, opposite the Greengrasses.

"So, our children are caught in a dangling marriage contract" said Cyrus.

"Our second this month" said Sirius.

Astoria snorts. Cyrus looks peeved. Daphne sits serenely, hands on her lap.

"We heard about that Riddle Girl. Who are they anyway?" asked Cyrus.

Harry coughs "Voldemort's bastard daughter" he says, as plainly as he can.

Salome speaks up "Well, I can see that would have been unacceptable" she says, in a dignified voice.

Daphne looks like she's holding in a sneeze, then snorts and laughs "Oh wow" she says, "You have the worst luck, Potter".

Sirius speaks up "So at present, Harry is my Heir, to Black, and Potter as well."

Cyrus blinks. "Both?"

"Well, I don't have a wife or children" said Sirius "But that could change"

Daphne gives Sirius a look that makes Harry think she thinks 'not bloody likely.'

He snorts. Daphne looks at him and nods.

Sirius starts again "Now Harry hasn't met Daphne, even though they're both at Hogwarts."

Daphne sits looking mostly serene, and a little bit nervous.

Harry tries to smile but he's feeling terrified.

"So, I assume that from how they're looking at each other, neither is super comfortable with the contract" said Sirius.

"Daphne is uh – " said Cyrus

"Surprised" said Daphne clearly, in an upper class accent. (And Harry thinks, she looks as surprised as Fleur Delacour at the first task. This is one seriously sneaky witch.)

Salome smiles thinly, as her daughter is acting so grown up.

"Well Harry, did say – that he thought he was a dead man" said Sirius.

"I'm dead. A witch from Slytherin, forced to marry me… I'm a dead man" said Harry, quoting.

Daphne snorted. Harry noticed that she was actually pretty. Why hadn't he noticed her at school? Oh yeah, Slytherin.

"So, we have a quite standard, unwanted contract. Any exit clauses you can find?" asked Sirius.

"Our lawyers have found the contract, and it is an old Black contract" said Salome, ominously.

"Oh dear" said Sirius.

"You are familiar with these contracts?" asked Cyrus.

"They have turned up in family discussions" said Sirius and sighed.

"Is there any way out of it?" asked Harry. Daphne looked serene. Damn, that was all she did. She was like a beautiful, serene witch he had to marry. Harry paused in his thinking. This was… weird.

"Well, if either of them die, the contract goes dangling again, and as you have two daughters..." said Sirius.

Astoria, who'd been looking fairly amused, suddenly looked horrified.

"And if Harry dies?"

"My next male heir, probably. The age range allowed in Black contracts is thirty years, with marriage at seventeen."

Both the Greengrass girls looked at Sirius, Astoria murderously, Daphne looking pained.

"And if either party murders the other, the contract will probably kill the other." said Sirius.

Daphne Greengrass sighed "Can we get on with this please" she said evenly.

"Dear, our lawyer is in hospital from trying to read the contract" said Cyrus gently.

"Oh yes, can't be read by uninterested parties." said Sirius offhandedly.

"You seem well-informed about these contracts" said Salome.

"Well, my cousin Bellatrix had one with Rudolphus LeStrange." said Sirius.

"Bellatrix LeStrange was contracted into ..." said Daphne Greengrass, looking disgusted.

"Yeah, Bella didn't take well to the contract, and then, well, she went mad." said Sirius

"What?" cried Cyrus.

"If they don't both say I do, and mean it, they get cursed, a compliance curse" said Sirius.

"You Beasts put this contract onto my poor Daphne!" cried Salome.

Harry was horrified. "I'm so sorry" he said.

"So we will have to love one another." said Daphne, simply.

"There is a loophole" said Sirius evenly.

"What, How?" asked Cyrus sharply.

"They have to say I do, and mean it. But they can change the vows they take, by mutual agreement."

"That's a hell of a loophole" said Cyrus.

"How much can you change the vows?" asked Daphne, curiously.

"Lets take a look" said Sirius.

Cyrus slid a very large, bulging envelope over to Sirius and he pulled out a hefty bundle of very old parchment.

"This is old" said Sirius sounding worried.

"Problem?" asked Salome.

"Older than I've seen before…. Oh that's not good. Oh that's awkward….. Oh bugger." said Sirius as he read. Sirius looked up "This contract has some fixed vows."

"What?" asked Cyrus

"Fidelity Loyalty and Domesticity" said Sirius.

"They have to live together, can't fool around and can't make oaths to others." Sirius explained

"Oaths?" asked Salome.

"Yeah, so they won't be saying "Basil, I love you and swear I'll marry you when Potter dies", because that would be breaking a vow, and that's very painful, or fatal." said Sirius.

"You know this contract?"

"I read fast" said Sirius "And summarise well, It got me EE's at Hogwarts."

Harry looks at his godfather and feels a surge of dislike. What a jammy prat.

"Anything else?" asked Cyrus, clearly equally irritated with his dogfather.

"Oh dear, It's got old-timey pre-marriage clauses." said Sirius, sounding disappointed.

"Pre-marriage?" asked Salome.

"Yeah, uh, fidelity, uh, " Sirius stopped reading. "Look, we can change some of this contract by mutual agreement."

"We can?" said Cyrus

"We can't stop it from being a contract, and we can't make it not a marriage contract, but we can take out the more awful clauses." said Sirius.

"We can?" asked Daphne. "What about add some?"

Sirius frowned.

"We can't get rid of the penalty clauses." said Sirius. "Some are painful… worse contracts have fatal penalties."

"Crap" said Daphne.

"What she said" said Harry.

"Look, loyalty" said Salome brightly. Daphne looked incredulously at her mother and sighed.

"We can take out the er, pre marriage fidelity clause, and the loyalty clause. We can't take out some of the courting clauses." said Sirius.

"Courting clauses" said Daphne, as if she'd just said "Terminal cancer in a friend"

"They have to date a set number of times per month, which is … two, and dine together weekly" said Sirius.

Daphne looked at Harry and mouthed what Harry was pretty sure was 'great hall'

"And there it is… the gala clause." said Sirius despondently.

"What?" asked Salome.

"At Galas, balls they must be on each others dance cards" said Sirius.

"That doesn't sound so awful" said Salome.

"And if they dance with anyone else, they die." said Sirius. "This is the contract grandmother used to scare all the little Blacks with."

"You're joking" said Daphne suddenly less serene.

"No, I'm always Sirius" said Sirius. "It's a stinker of a clause."

Harry spoke up "What counts as dining together?" he asked.

Sirius flipped pages "The same room at the same time" he said.

Harry laughed then said "Miss Greengrass, may I have the honour of dining with you at Hogwarts in the great hall, I'll be at the Griffindor table, you'll be at Slytherin"

Daphne looked amused "That sounds delightful. Why let us dine there up to three times a day."

Salome laughed. She had a very pretty laugh, though Harry. Maybe her daughter does too.

"So what counts as a date?" asked Harry.

Sirius flipped backward and forwards "Er, that's harder, they have to be in close proximity, interact and be seen."

"Hmm. Potions?" said Harry.

"No way. You're always getting picked on by Snape, and I'm only getting A's as it is."

"Walks to the black lake?" asked Harry

"Sure. And Hogsmeade, and you're taking me for dates before term starts." said Daphne.

"Dates" said Harry, nervously, this discussion had turned like a twisty-turny thing..

"We can't fight this, so we might as well get to know one another" said Daphne.

Harry's brain churned. He wanted to go for a run right now. A long run… to far away.

"Do you fancy going for a run in the morning" asked Harry, his mouth engaging without his brain's help.

"Sounds good too." said Daphne, being very nice.

"Choir?" asked Daphne.

"Can't sing." said Harry. "You'll learn" she said in a slightly different less nice tone.

"Gobstones?" said Daphne.

"Okay, that's doable" said Harry.

"Can you two get that close at Gobstones club without social death?" asked Astoria.

"Erm, that's a valid point" said Daphne. "Father, you need to put a notice in the paper, announcing this betrothal."

Cyrus made a hmm sound and made a note on some parchment he conjured.

"You'd best get some muggle running shoes and clothes" said Harry.

"Uhuh. " said Daphne. "Tight ones I suppose?" she said. Harry coughed and blushed. Sirius looked amused.

"Um Daphne, do you like to dance?" asked Harry.

"Yes." she replied "Dancing with me weekly?" she asked, as if talking about the weather.

Dancing thought Harry. That's hard. With her. Oh… I really need to get out of here. His leg started to jiggle itself.

"Daphne aren't you concerned about social death?" asked Astoria.

"No, we're well off, he's rich, and he gets the Black title as well. I think Lady Potter-Black sounds good enough to put up with some… bitchy bitches in Slytherin." said Daphne.

Sirius snorted.

Harry's brain slowed… she was going to have trouble because of Him… Slytherins had always seemed like one big gang to him and Ron. Harry felt as confused as if Hermione was explaining transfiguration.

"Well what about having kiss him?" asked Daphne. Harry's brain screeched to a halt. Kissing! What the hell.

Sirius nodded "That would only be in a really old contract." said Sirius reassuringly.

"Isn't this one really old?" said Cyrus nervously.

Sirius flicked through it "Here we go… courting clauses… no no no No specific kissing clause."

"Whew" said Astoria.

Daphne snorted.

"Daphne, have I told you how much I love you and want you to be healthy" said Astoria.

Daphne rolled her eyes. Harry laughed, she was really funny.

Sirius was running his finger down the pages and he stopped and snorted. "Oh, that's awkward."

"Awkward" asked Cyrus

"There's an, er intimacy clause in the courting clauses." said Sirius

"Not..." asked Cyrus, looking nervous.

"No.. but they've got to swap spit. They got to hold one another.. . and laugh." said Sirius

"Laugh?" said a horrified Salome.

"They just have to make each other laugh" said Sirius.

"Well I can just listen to Harry put Draco in his place. I'll laugh" said Daphne.

Harry goggled. "You're kidding?"

"I suspect I will be kidding" said Daphne, and winked. Harry snorted.

"What's the penalty on that?" asked Cyrus.

"Oh… um , oh that's very creative.. I'd be proud of that myself." said Sirius.

"What?" asked Salome, suddenly sounding angry.

"If Harry doesn't make Daphne laugh, she won't taste sweet, and vice versa" said Sirius.

Cyrus snorted "They are the sweetness of each other lives". The adults chortled.

"Can you lot stop laughing at my imminent loss of a taste bud" said Harry angrily.

Daphne looked smug "You'll be fine. I'm brilliantly funny" she said confidently.

"The courting clauses don't kick in till you're fifteen" said Sirius.

"Which of us?" asked Harry.

"Either"

"July 31" said Harry.

"May 12" said Daphne.

"Thanks Daphne, I'm sure" said Harry. Daphne smiled serenely.

"What about love potions" asked Astoria, rubbing her hands together.

"What?" asked Sirius

"Well, they can take a love potion, do disgusting things, and not hate themselves, and do it again two weeks later." said Astoria.

"A mild love potion" said Salome.

"Amortentia would be right out" said Cyrus.

"Well, really, would it?" asked Sirius. Cyrus frowned.

"What's Amortentia?" asked Harry.

"The most powerful love potion there is" said Cyrus.

"Why the hell would we want to use that?" asked Daphne. "We're getting married. We'll date, we'll be up-front with people, He'll be all heroic, and good at Quidditch. I'll be brilliant. It will be fine."

Astoria snorted and sniggered.

"I'll never taste sweet again" moaned Harry.

Daphne looked dismissive. "Hey Potter, what do you call a man with no brain?" asked Daphne.

"I dunno Daphne, what do you call a man with no brain?" asked Harry.

"Your godfather." she said.

Harry chuckled. Maybe treacle tart wasn't going off the menu.

Harry looked at her face and thought, one day, I'll be married to her. It made a tiny part of his heart warmer.

"So the funny thing about Amortentia, is it smells different to everyone" said Cyrus.

Daphne, Astoria and Harry were all surprised. Sirius smirked.

"Although it's a love potion, if you smell it, you smell your actual love." said Cyrus.

"What?" said Harry.

"So if I smell it, I smell you mother's perfume" said Cyrus. Salome held Cyrus's hand.

Astoria mimed vomiting.

Harry chuckled.

"Can we put in a no non-consenting sex clause already" said Daphne stiffly.

Harry went red and tried to slide under the table.

Sirius coughed "Wise idea" he said, red-faced and choking on embarrassment.

Cyrus and Salome stared at their eldest daughter. Salome looked…. Proud of her. Cyrus turned to look at Harry. "We will make this clause extra painful and utterly lethal" said Cyrus, glaring at Harry.

Cyrus and Sirius added a non-consenting sex clause and signed it. Daphne smiled "Now, I feel safe." she said. "Harry, you can't order me to perform for you now, so if you ever use the compliance clause once we're married, you're as good as dead."

"I wouldn't….' " stammered Harry.

"And now you can't" said Daphne, and smiled, almost sweetly.

Sirius asked "So how do you two feel about this now?"

"He's got a bad reputation that seems not to be true" said Daphne. "I look forward to finding out about him."

"I'd never met her" said Harry "But at least I know she's prepared to date me. And I have to start kissing her in a year."

Cyrus looked like he wanted to say something.

"May Twelfth" said Daphne. "After that I have to kiss you, green-eyes."

Harry blushed. Salome looked at a serene Daphne and smiled.

Cyrus took a deep breath "Well, this is, going, um, better than I expected." he said, sounding surprised.

"The marriage vows are problematic?" asked Daphne.

Sirius nodded "My cousin screamed all the way to altar. Of course, then she screamed afterwards, but that was because she went insane. Not that she was ever all there to start with..." said Sirius.

Harry and Daphne swallowed and looked pale.

"We need to change the vows" said Harry. Daphne nodded.

The removable vows were removed.

"So that's what we have to say" said Daphne, reading the page.

"Not for three years" said Harry.

"Ages away" said Daphne airy.

"I'm sorry this happened" said Harry. "My life's been rubbish, but I'm sorry you're dragged into it"

Daphne looked surprised "You really are sorry, aren't you?" she asked.

"Well of course" said Harry.

Sirius patted Harry on the back "Well said Harry"

"So Potter, why do you only wear school robes, even on weekends?" asked Daphne.

Sirius spoke up "Harry lived with his Muggle aunt and uncle until I was freed. They didn't like him, and gave him nothing but hand-me-down clothes. So he hasn't been spoiled."

Daphne looked from Sirius to Harry and back "But Dumbledore..."

"Isn't exactly our favourite person" said Harry darkly.

Cyrus spoke up "I want to have a quick word with Harry, alone before we all leave"

Sirius smiled and Harry wondered what the hell was going on.

Cyrus waved Harry over to the corner of the room and waved his wand a few times "Privacy charms. Now we can talk without being overheard."

"What did you have to say, Um… Lord Greengrass."

"Don't say um." said Cyrus, then paused. "I'd like you to know, Harry Potter that I have a large property, thirty acres, covered in muggle repelling charms, and I'm good at digging charms. If you harm my daughter, or even make her cry, I'm prepared to put you in a hole in the ground, boy who lived or not."

Harry felt anger "Look I'd never hurt a girl!" he said.

"If my daughter is not acceptably happy, and you don't woo her respectfully, I'll be waiting" said Cyrus.

"I promise" said Harry.

Cyrus dispelled the charm and went back to shake Sirius's hand. Harry missed the nod Cyrus and Sirius shared.

Sirius took Harry's shoulder in his hands when they got back to Grimmauld place.

"I like her. Hell, If you weren't betrothed to her, I'd wonder about negotiating it. She's a pistol."

Harry's mouth opened "You wouldn't."

"I don't have to" said Sirius and laughed "And her mothers' a looker too."

Harry shrugged.

"Girls end up looking like their mothers, usually" said Sirius, nodding his head.

"Did Lord Greengrass, Cyrus give you the digging charm speech?" asked Sirius.

Harry crossed his arms over his chest "I wasn't Going to do anything wrong."

Sirius chuckled "That speech is traditional. Many fathers, wizards or muggles tell some variation of it. I can't remember how many times I've heard it."

"So he wasn't serious?" asked Harry.

"I'm serious" said Sirius and smirked. "You two don't have the choice of other people if this doesn't work out, so, be respectful, and you're still grounded. Except for dates with Miss Greengrass, of course."

-==0==-

Harry sits at Florean Fortescues, in new dressy robes, feeling a bit silly. Daphne's letter had arranged for them to meet for ice-cream at eleven.

Daphne was exactly five minutes late. She arrived in a pretty floral dress and she looks, well very pretty. She smiles slightly at Harry.

"Now what you do when meeting a female of status, is stand up, kiss my knuckles and help me to my chair." said Daphne.

"Not the lips" asked Harry.

"Not yet" said Daphne, suddenly looking nervous.

Harry got up and took Daphne's hand "Miss Greengrass" he said and kissed her knuckles.

"Call me Daphne, after all we're betrothed" said Daphne, and Harry pulled her chair out for her. She sat down, smiled at Harry and he sat back down on the other side of the table.

"Not bad, Potter" she said.

"Call me Harry" said Harry. "This is weird."

"Very weird." said Daphne. "But we're both stuck in this, so we might as well date, get to know each other. Who knows, we might fall in love" she said with a tiny smile that died quickly.

Harry looked at his future wife and shook his head "Are you some Harry Potter fan-girl?" he asked

"Oh certainly not" said Daphne. "But if you don't order me ice-cream, I shall be quite put out" she said, with a small smile.

Harry laughed. "How are you so calm about this?" he asked.

"An old female friend who had a contract like this told me all about it." said Daphne. "But don't tell mother and father, I'm not supposed to have communicated with her."

"Miss Daphne Greengrass is a rule-breaker?" asked Harry, incredulous.

"You have No idea" said Daphne and sniggered.

"Good grief, are you a bad girl?" asked Harry, going pink.

Daphne snorted "Potter, don't get ahead of yourself."

She paused.

"Sorry, Harry, dear you need to talk me into anything… oh and It occurs to me, that includes kisses… so Unless you want to spend a lot of time in the infirmary, you need to woo harder… So much harder." Daphne giggled. "Ice-cream!" she said.

"You… you sneaky ,devious..." started Harry.

"Slytherin" said Daphne. "Sneaky , Devious, Clever, Brilliant, beautiful Slytherin" she said, running a hand thorough her hair.

Harry stared "An a wee bit full of yourself too" said Harry.

"Harry dear, I'm going to grow up to look like Mother" said Daphne and batted her eyelashes. "Bring ice-cream" she said, then snorted.

"We're going running if you keep eating ice-cream" said Harry. 'Or you'll look like a hippo' he thought.

"I already agreed" said Daphne. "What are yoga pants for anyway?"

Harry choked and went red. Daphne laughed. "Oh, you're so easy to wind up. Aren't we just having fun" she laughed again.

Harry looked up at his laughing betrothed. "What kind of ice-cream?" he asked.

"The most expensive one. In case anyone sees what we're doing. We're sending a message and having a date" said Daphne.

"You don't mind this contract?" asked Harry nervously.

"I hate having my choices taken away." said Daphne very seriously. "But you can't touch me without my consent, so there's that. Let's not waste our lives in bitterness, when we could have a good time. Speaking of which: ice-cream. Two spoons."

Harry went and got a chocolate-mint-cherry sundae with fairy wing dusting.

"Oh, choc cherry" said Daphne. "Bum" she said.

"Oh, do you not like it?" asked Harry, amused by her suddenly childish expletive.

"Well, it's just.. it it gets on my new dress it'll stain" said Daphne.

"What" asked Harry, but Daphne had already taken an spoonful and was eating it, a look of pleasure on her face. Harry took a spoonful and ate it experimentally. It was utterly delicious.

"Choc Cherry mint!" said Daphne, taking the spoon out of her mouth. "You've done well!"

Harry smiled and had some more. Damn it was nice. More ice-cream was eaten.

Harry was taking a spoonful, when Daphne's spoon hit his. Harry looked up. Daphne had some chocolate around her mouth, and she was looking annoyed.

"Er, have I done something wrong?" asked Harry.

"You were about to" said Daphne. "It's mine now" she declared.

"You can't just say It's mine now" said Harry "We were sharing it."

"And that is over, and now, Its is mine!" said Daphne, taking a spoonful. Harry snorted.

Daphne ate the spoonful and went for another.

"You have some chocolate around your mouth" said Harry, and pointed at his own lips.

"Nice try Harry, you can't fool me into putting down my spoon" said Daphne, eyes twinkling.

Harry felt oddly happy, but took a napkin "Here, let me get it" he said, and leaned over with the napkin.

Daphne sat still as Harry got some chocolate ice-cream off the side of her mouth, rubbing her pink lips with the napkin. He showed Daphne the napkin.

"Oh my, you were serious." said Daphne "My apologies. I would have looked like an absolute pig with that around my mouth."

"You just looked like you were enjoying the sundae" said Harry reassuringly.

"Thank you" said Daphne, going for more sundae.

Harry's peripheral vision had noticed a few Hogwarts-age students walk past, see Daphne and Harry and slow down, then walk off, resolutely not staring.

"We've been seen many times" said Harry as Daphne polished off the sundae.

"I know" said Daphne.

"But you're facing the shop" said Harry.

"Reflections in the windows" she said simply.

-==0==-

Sirius hadn't been kidding about being grounded. He wasn't even allowed to go to the burrow.

Ron had sent him some magazines, it was either read them or studying.

Harry lay on his bed, reading "What Broomstick". There was a letter in letters to the editor, claiming to have cracked the secret to taking the safeties off Firebolts. According to the writer of the letter, it gave a fifteen percent improvement in acceleration and raised the top speed to a literally eye-watering seven hundred miles an hour. The editor had noted after the letter that such a modified broom was illegal for competitive Quidditch, and probably at risk of exploding. There was some stuff about getting injured fatally at speeds over seven hundred miles and hour that Harry didn't understand, so he ignored it. Harry grabbed some parchment and wrote a letter to his newest best friend.

"Hedgwig, you up for a trip to America?" he asked. "Prek?" she said.

**-==0==-**

**The Odeon, Surrey.**

Sirius stood around in his leather jacket and jeans, while Harry waited in jeans and a horizontally striped sweatshirt.

"Why here?" asked Sirius.

"Sentimental place for me. I came here last summer. Saw films, played the games... got better at shooting things" said Harry.

"This is there?" said Sirius.

"Yeah" said Harry nodding.

Daphne arrived in a pretty floral dress and shoes, she frowned at Harry's sweatshirt "What is that" she asked. Her Mother stood behind Daphne, wearing a plainer dress.

"The fashion" said Harry.

Daphne rolled her eyes "So what are we here for?"

"We're going to play some games, and see a film" said Harry.

"Games?" asked Daphne.

Daphne was amazed, until they played Lethal Enforcer. "You've played this before" she said, clumsily shooting baddies as Harry blew away baddie after baddie.

"It is my favourite kind of game." admitted Harry.

"Mother, we're having Harry around to go riding soon" said Daphne, speeding up her shooting.

After the movie... which was called Jack and Sarah, and confused Harry a bit but had Sirius laughing in some odd places, Sirius and Harry went home. Daphne had held his hand. It was… nice.

The elf cleaning service had made Grimmauld place less awful, though it was still clearly a bachelor pad.

"So, You're going to the Greengrasses to go horse riding" said Sirius, smiling oddly.

"But I don't know how" said Harry.

"And that's the point. Daphne realised you were an expert at the game, so she's changed the next thing to something she's expert at."

"Did I do the wrong thing?"

"You two are just learning about each other. You started out pussy-footing around each other, now you can have a little mutual push-back. Don't push that girl too hard. I know her type."

"What type?"

"The kind who um… it's a good kind" said Sirius, smiling a tiny bit.

"So Sirius, do you have any Horse riding tips?" asked Harry.

"No Harry, you're going to be a total learner. Good luck with that" chuckled Sirius.

**-==0==-**

Harry was in his room alone doing something he didn't want to be caught doing.

He had his broomstick in one hand, and his wand in the other.

He referred again to the parchment he'd bought, owl order from America. He cast the spell, revealing a spinning blue web of charms around the firebolt's bristle-ring. He carefully pulled on one cluster with his wand, and used a small rune-covered stone to hold the charm down. One down, nineteen to go.

Four hours later, Harry's hands were shaking, but the firebolt was free of unnecessary safeties. Well, all safeties, as keeping the not-flying into walls and the ground impact control charm was too fiddly for Harry to manage. He couldn't wait to try it out. It was going to be awesome.

**-==0==-**

**Harry has a perfectly nice time on the Hogwarts express.**

Hermione and Ron are pleased to see him, he catches up with Seamus and Dean, and enjoys some sweets and exploding snap with his best friends.

Eventually Hermione asks the question that's been filling the room like a dungbomb.

"Harry, are you really betrothed to Daphne Greengrass from Slytherin" she asks.

"Yes, and I have no choice about it. It was a Black family contract that activated when we were both fourteen. It's unbreakable. Daphne's being a really good sport about it." said Harry.

"Cor and you and she..." said Seamus.

"No." said Harry. "And when we do, it'll be nobody's business but our own."

"Oh Harry I'm so sorry " said Ron. "But she's very… um… I dunno."

"She likes sneaky, devious and brilliant" said Harry, neglecting to say beautiful.

Draco Malfoy turns up for his annual on-train bullying attempt.

"You're back, you stinky glory thief" says Draco Malfoy.

"Sorry Draco, yes I am" says Harry, looking back at his card game.

"You can't just ignore me!" says Draco.

"Draco, I had two adults try to kill me last year. A bit of verbal abuse from the Heir to the Malfoy name, really, you're not so bad"

Draco doesn't know quite what to think at this statement.

"You'll get yours" says Draco.

"Draco, as you may have heard, I got captured by a dangling Black marriage contract. So my life is already determined, and there's a special witch who I need to have successfully wooed before her fifteenth birthday. Really, you're going to hex me painfully and call me names. Big deal."

Hermione and Ron look at Harry incredulously.

"Do neither of you read the paper" Harry said. "It was at the bottom of the article."

"I thought you got out of the contract with that Delphini girl" said Ron. Hermione rolled her eyes.

"She was never a threat. She's a bastard daughter of a halfblood, so Sirius tore up the contract" said Harry.

Draco Malfoy's mouth opened and shut.

Ron looked up at Draco "I think you broke him, Harry"

"Marriage contracts are a barbaric" said Hermione.

"Yes they are" said Harry. "And involuntary for everyone in my case"

Draco Malfoy left, looking at Harry briefly, with a look of, was that pity?

-==0==-

Term starts with the surprise announcement that Professor Moody is back for a second year "I wasn't here last year, that was a Death Eater polyjuiced as me" says Moody in his introductory speech. By Hogwarts standards, a pretty upbeat start to the year. The first years look frightened.

Harry shakes his head. There's not even a corridor of painful death this year. Kids these days. No backbone.

Harry is surprised, when after the announcements, a group of students led by Professor Flitwick go up to the platform high table sits on and form three rows.

Harry sees a certain pretty blonde Slytherin, who is in the back row.

The ones in the front row are holding toads, and some more students are holding musical instruments.

They start to play a boppy tune, and then the group sings. It's a witchey song, about bubbling cauldrons and trouble, and rather catchy, and Harry enjoys it.

Judging by the applause, so does most of the school. This must be the choir, and Daphne can really sing well.

After the singers depart back to their tables, Professor Moody winked at him from the high table.

Harry was more interested in watching Daphne's school robes. He knew from studies of her sundress, and jodhpurs exactly what that ripple in the school robes was. Mmmmm.

"Harry, are you really stuck in this marriage contract" asked Hermione, after the first course.

"Yes mother" said Harry sarcastically. "Daphne Greenness and I. We don't know each other, and we have to get married. We have three years left, then..." said Harry.

"Blimey" said Ron "You have the worst luck Harry."

"There has to be some way out of the contract, maybe I can research it and help" said Hermione.

"Hermione, listen very carefully, I will say this only once. The contract is cursed, and if you read it, you'd end up in St Mungos."

Hermione looked horrified. "That's awful."

"The Greengrasses lawyer tried to read it" said Harry. "He's in St Mungos now. Janus Thackery ward." said Harry. Neville glanced casually in Harry's direction.

"Ending up in St Mungos is not as bad as having to marry someone you don't love" said Ron.

Hermione gave Ron a look that seemed oddly approving. Harry resolved to remember the time when Ron said something Hermione approved of fully. He suspected it might not happen again soon.

Neville blinked, as did Seamus and Dean. Hermione approving of anything Ron thought was rather odd.

-==0==-

Harry sent Daphne a letter, organising to run the next morning.

Daphne arrived on time, seven a.m. wearing a neat green tracksuit with silver piping, her hair in a ponytail.

"No yoga gear?" asked Harry, jokingly.

"You have to earn that" said Daphne, handing him a t-shirt.

It was Griffindor red and had written on the front "Property of Daphne Greengrass"

"Well, get changed!" said Daphne, grinning.

Harry took off his tracksuit top and went to pull the t-shirt on over the one he already had on.

"Oh don't be coy, I've seen you topless last year" said Daphne.

Harry slumped and changed shirts. Daphne had a little smirk. "Come on" she said.

Daphne was, for a non-runner surprisingly fit. They ran down to the lake and around once.

By the time the got back to the castle, Daphne was slow and puffed. She unzipped her tracksuit top and revealed a sweaty green t-shirt. Harry couldn't help notice she was a girl. Again. Mmmm boobs.

"What, no Property of Harry Potter on it" said Harry.

Daphne snorted "Not likely" she said. "People would think we were doing… things... I'll run, what every other day"

Harry nodded "You'll get faster" Daphne sighed. "Well not every other day. I'm not running if I've got my monthly."

Harry went beet red.

"You're engaged, I get monthlies, get over it. It's like coming down with something and getting bloated, and cramps." said Daphne. "Ask Granger, or someone about it but expect to get hexed"

Harry ran up the stairs to Gryffindor faster than he'd been running.'Monthlies…. Eek'

The next morning, early to avoid prying eyes, Harry took his Firebolt down to the lake and got on. It floated the same. He accelerated off ,and it felt a bit faster; until he lay down and urged it onwards, and then it shuddered briefly and shot forward. He shot across the lake, the wind tearing at him like knives, his glasses icing up. The broom started to shake, then straightened up. He was going really, blurrily fast. The broom would barely turn, and he did a long, slow turn over the valley, coming back to rest near the lake, absolutely freezing, his glasses like icecubes. 'That was awesome' he thought.

The next day, after dinner, he nodded to Daphne Greengrass and they stood up and left the Great hall at the same time, and headed down to the lake.

"How was your day" asked Harry.

"Pansy gave me shit." said Daphne bluntly. "So I hexed her."

Harry snorted.

"Get us some rings. Something tasteful, no stones bigger than robins eggs" said Daphne, lips twitching.

"What did you get her with?"

"A leg-binder then a tickling charm. I call it the plausible fun combo. It's hard to get detentions for."

"I didn't think Slytherins ever fought one another?"

"Just not in public" said Daphne. "How was your day."

"Well, Hermione's being weird." said Harry.

"She has a crush on you" said Daphne blandly.

"But she's my friend… since first year" said Harry.

"And she has an unrequited crush on you. Tell her to move on, it's only fair to her." said Daphne, in a tone that was almost kind.

They skipped stones for a bit.

"Oh, and tell Weasley's little sister not to try to dance with you. The Gala clause and all that."

"Why would Ginny want to dance with me?" asked Harry.

"Because she's got a crush on you" said Daphne, rolling her eyes.

"Look, every girl does not have a crush on Harry Potter!" said Harry firmly.

"That's true." said Daphne. "But we all grew up with the stories of the boy-who-lived, and the books."

"Books?"

Daphne snorted "You don't know…. There's a series of books about Harry Potter before he goes to Hogwarts. They were bestsellers, while you were wherever."

"Living with my muggle aunt and uncle, who did not like me" said Harry.

"Yeah that."

"So what's in the books?" asked Harry.

"Er, Harry has all these friends, lives in a castle and has adventures, defeats baddies. And he's betrothed to this mysterious young witch. So the little girl reading it can think it's her."

"And you know this how"

Daphne blushed "They were very popular" she said.

Harry laughed. "That's awful, yet funny." he snorted again "I mean, I do live in a castle now, and have adventures, but only in term time."

"And dates with me aren't adventures?" asked Daphne, raising an eyebrow.

"Well most of my adventures risked death, so no, not like that at all" said Harry. "and only the two best friends really."

"See you later Harry" said Daphne, walking off.

"Daphne?" called Harry.

"Yeah what?" said Daphne, turning her head

"Want to ride my broomstick?" he asked. Daphne went red and left hurriedly.

'Honestly, why were girls weird about that. Firebolts were the best.' thought Harry.

-==0==-

Professor Moody held Harry back after class.

He spelled the door shut and then asked "Potter, Where's your gun?"

"In storage. I figure with Voldemort contained, I'm a lot safer, and the gun is hard to hide, and if someone found it..." said Harry.

"Yes, that would be a problem. You're going to practice fighting with magic instead, twice a week. After dinner."

"I have Quidditch practice on Tuesdays and Thursdays"

"So Mondays and Wednesdays it is, my office. Eight pm. Sharp."

Harry nodded "Thanks Professor"

"Are you really cursed by a marriage contract Potter?" asked Professor Moody.

"Yes sir."

"Well, who is it?" asked Professor Moody.

"Daphne Greengrass, Slytherin"

"huh, you could do worse" said Professor Moody. "They're not outright evil."

"The first one was Voldemort's daughter!" cried Harry.

"Well, that was pretty unlucky, but you got out, and I caught wee miss Riddle."

"What !"

"Well, lets just say the apple doesn't fall far from the tree" said the Professor.

"So she was evil?"

"Like a miniature Bellatrix LeStrange" said Professor Moody.

"Er, that's my aunt, and I think it was the marriage contract that drove her mad" said Harry.

"Huh, you didn't arrest her at Hogsmeade like I did for fighting. Bellatrix Black was a mean, angry young woman" said Professor Moody.

Harry's testicles tried to retract spontaneously into his body.

"Don't you worry. Every few generations someone gets caught by a dangling contract. They do fine" said Professor Moody.

"We're getting to know one another" said Harry.

"Good start." said Professor Moody

"Hardly romantic is it?" said Harry.

"Romance, pish. If you took her out to dinner at a nice restaurant, and chatted you couldn't tell the difference" said Professor Moody.

"But feelings" said Harry, angstily.

"You're fourteen. You'll get feelings alright. And then you'll get older, and get over them. At least your beat Voldemort. You only have to worry about the usual suspects now."

"Can I go now?" asked Harry.

"Sure you can, you poor wee boy" said Professor Moody sarcastically.

Telling Professor Moody about the whole Greengrass situation was looking less and less like a good idea. He had no sympathy for Harry's feelings.

-==0==-

Harry waited nervously in the mostly-empty classroom on Friday after dinner.

Daphne Greengrass came in "You're here. Good." she said, and put a music box on one of the few desks in the room. She wound it up and it started to tinkle out a tune.

Dah de dah da dah dah dah dah da de dah dah dah, it tinkled, then repeated.

"What's the tune" asked Harry.

"I don't know, but it's okay for dancing to" she said, and Harry found himself waltzing with Daphne Greengrass, who was a bit little taller than Harry.

It was… actually kind of nice.

When the music box finally stopped Daphne said "Thank you, Harry, same time next week?"

"Oh course Daphne" said Harry, reusing his relative-placating skills.

She hugged him. That was unexpected.

-==0==-

Sirius came through by post three days later with an old Potter ring. He'd found one with a diamond that was just slightly smaller than a robins egg, and a mens ring that matched.

He looked up, saw Daphne watching him nodded and left the great Hall.

Daphne met him in the side hall the first years got held in.

"Well what?"

Harry took out a ring box and opened it.

"You ass, that's huge!" she said, but looked less cross than she sounded.

"Smaller than a robins egg" said Harry pointedly.

Daphne held out her hand. Harry kissed her knuckles, then slid the ring on her ring finger. Daphne looked at Harry with watery eyes.

Harry gave her the second ring box, which she opened.

"And you get a tasteful one!" she said.

"You can give me a huge, silly one next time" said Harry.

Daphne took Harry's hand in her small, cool hands and slipped the ring on his ring finger. Harry felt strangely excited. He had an engagement ring, that his girlfriend had put on his hand.

"How about a kiss?" asked Harry.

"I suppose so" said Daphne.

They kissed, chastely, but firmly. Harry closed his eyes. Daphne backed off and spoke up "What are you doing with your eyes closed."

"Enjoying the kiss" said Harry. Daphne blushed and left hurriedly.

-==0==-

Harry gingerly entered the classroom that held Hogwarts's Gobstones club.

There were a surprising range of ages of students. Obviously first years, but even a few sixth years too.

Daphne Greengrass was crouched, flicking a marble-like Gobstones into a chalk circle, where it knocked the other marbles away.

Harry watched a few games, conveniently near Daphne, and a Hufflepuff second year explained the rules to Harry. Eventually he said "Oh, my names Sammy."

"Thanks for the lesson Sammy" said Harry.

Harry ended up playing a round of Gobstones with Daphne and Sammy.

The game, with ten marbles – Gobstones, got to call them Gobstones each took a while. Harry hadn't played marbles at primary school, but he'd played in his cupboard. He thought he was doing well.

"In your face Potter!" exclaimed Daphne, as the Gobstones spat green goo all over Harry's face and clothes.

"Is she always like this" murmured Harry to Fay Dunbar, as Daphne did a little victory dance while waving her hands.

Fay nodded "You think that's bad, she's a worse loser." she explained. "Keeps going for rematches."

-==0==-

Friday night came again and Harry got to the room they danced in, and found Daphne already there with the music box.

Daphne adjusted the music box and it played the same tune, but longer between repeating, with a bit that seems not like dance steps.

"When this other bit plays we'll do a lift and turn" Daphne explained.

"It's kind of swoopy" said Harry. Daphne's lips twitched upwards briefly. "Indeed, swoopy" she said. Daphne talked Harry through doing a lifting turn. Daphne was heavier than Harry expected, but already knew not to say so. She was basically a relative, like the Dursleys.

They were both laughing after three repetitions of the tune. Harry kept getting it subtly wrong, and Daphne stopped, hands on hips "You're magic on a broom. You cannot be this bad at dancing. It's the same as Quidditch moves." she said.

"Are you saying you like my broom work?" said Harry innocently and for some reason Daphne blushed and turned and hid her face for a minute or so.

He got the move eventually. She hugged him again after the dance. Harry experimentally hugged back. It was… nice.

Harry went back to his Dorm room tired yet, happy. Dancing with Daphne was turning into fun. And she did have amazingly funny snark when she got going. He felt warm. Must be the exercise.

-==0==-

Harry took the train back to London at Christmas.

Hermione sat opposite him, wearing a woolly jumper with a snowflake a pattern and reading.

Ron had found the lure of the castle over Christmas, and infinite food, irresistible. All the Weasleys were staying, so Harry surmised that the Weasley parents might want to get value for money from their education.

After an hour on the train, Hermione looked up, cast a locking charm on the door and said

"So where is she?"

"Where is who, Hermione?" asked Harry.

"Greengrass."

"I don't know if she's on the train" lied Harry. "We can't get out of it, we're dating to get used to each other."

"Harry?"

"What, Hermione?"

"Is there another witch you'd rather be with" she asked.

"Not really" said Harry.

Hermione's eyes did a … thing.

"Hermione, you're my best friend, but you have to let go of feelings like that." said Harry.

"Like that."

"Well, your crush" said Harry embarrassed.

"I'm you're best friend" asked Hermione stiffly.

"Of course Hermione. You're like the sister I never had" said Harry sincerely.

Hermione gave Harry a watery smile and raised her book.

He didn't hear anything out of her all the way to Kings Cross.

-==0==-

Kings cross, Platform 9 3/4

Sirius grabbed him, hugged him and said "Come on, Christmas shopping to do."

"What?" asked Harry.

"Well you need to buy Miss Greengrass something, and I need to buy her family something."

"I suppose so."

"You suppose so. We're going there for Christmas lunch."

Harry's heart fell "Er, this is going to be awkward."

"Oh you two will get over it" said Sirius. "Once the snogging starts, you'll soon both be gagging for it."

-==0==-

Christmas dinner was awkward.

Sirius and Harry sat at one end of the table, and Daphne was forced to sit next to Harry.

"Daphne" said Harry, uncomfortable in new robes.

"Harry" said Daphne, looking elegant and composed.

After dinner, they exchanged gifts.

Daphne had got him a wand holster… which was actually a great present, come to think of it.

"Thank you, this is great" said Harry honestly.

Harry felt terrible, because he'd only got Daphne a box of chocolates and a book on runes.

She opened the parcel and looked surprised. "Chocolates from DeThierry's and Strowager's On Exchange runes."

"I'm sorry" said Harry.

Daphne looked up "This is a… great gift Harry" she said, and leaned forwards. Harry gulped. The outline of boobs was seen. Boobs. Harry blinked. Daphne winked very slowly. Harry suddenly needed to move.

She settled down on the couch with the chocolates and swatted Astoria's hand when she tried to take one. "These are from DeThierry's, and they are mine. Get your own."

Astoria slunk off.

Harry retreated to Sirius, who was watching , looking amused "Sirius, why didn't we just get Honeydukes."

"Because DeThierry's are a fancy french brand, and your Daphne clearly appreciates them."

Daphne was currently nibbling a chocolate, while reading the book on runes.

"You set me up" accused Harry.

"Harry, you can give a girlfriend Honeydukes, keep it in the cupboard, but to really impress a witch, you pull out the stops and buy something more exclusive. Though as you'll never have an ordinary girlfriend, you can skip the whole Honeydukes thing."

"No he can't" said Daphne loudly "I expect to be supplied with essentials, like Honeydukes and sugar quills". 'She's got the hearing of a bloody bat.' thought Harry.

"Good thing you can go to Hogsmeade to stock up" said Sirius, winking at Harry. Harry rolled his eyes.

"What is it with witches and Sugar quills" said Harry.

"Harry, don't wonder. Just supply your betrothed and bask in her love" said Sirius.

Daphne stared at Sirius, and Harry wondered again when she would master magically skinning by glaring. Fairly soon, he guessed. Daphne looked back at Harry and mouthed 'five minutes.'

Harry got dragged off by Astoria for a chat

"So, what do you like?"

"Flying, Quidditch, um… exploding snap, exploring the castle." said Harry.

"Well Daphne likes boring things, like horse riding, Gobstones, choir."

"She's very competitive" said Astoria. "Won't stop till she's won."

"uhuh. The choir thing was very good" said Harry. "Flitwick asked me not to come to practice again."

Astoria looked at Harry "Were you disruptive?"

"Just, a bit rubbish" said Harry. "I can apparently carry a tune, but not far."

Astoria laughed. It sounded like a Greengrass female laugh. Daphne's was prettier, thought Harry.

"She's been in it since first year. Some years they put on actual performances in the great hall" said Astoria. "They're doing one this year, she's been talking about it."

"When is it" asked Harry.

"June" said Astoria.

"Oh" said Harry despondently.

"What?" asked Astoria.

"After her birthday" explained Harry.

"You'd better get her something good for her birthday, especially as she has to kiss you after that."

"That's why, oh."

Roughly four minutes after Daphne had told him, Harry slipped out of the drawing room, and loitered semi-hidden in the hallway. A minute or so later Daphne came out and found him.

"About your present" said Daphne.

Er yes" said Harry.

Daphne leaned closer and pecked him on the lips.

"I love them" she said and whirled off into the house.

Harry touched his lips. She'd kissed him. With her lips. On his lips. Wow.

-==0==-

Daphne approached Harry near the end of the visit.

"Harry, we need to organise a way to meet."

"uh, yeah" said Harry.

"Well, do you have an idea?"

"Go to an abandoned classroom and wait there, I'll turn up" said Harry.

"How would you know that?" she asked.

"I just… look I have a magical map of Hogwarts I inherited from my father. It shows everyone, so I if I see you in an abandoned classroom, I'll come."

"People will see you coming."

"No they won't, I have a cloak of invisibility from my father."

"Nonsense, your invisibility cloak would be worn out by now."

Harry pulled the cloak out of his robe pocket and pulled it on.

"That's amazing" said Daphne with wonder, as Harry wasn't there.

"Now if you can wear that all the time we're married, that would be good" she said laughing.

Harry took off the cloak and put it away. "I might just sneak into your dorm room instead" said Harry.

Daphne blinked "You couldn't possibly know where the Slytherin dorms are."

"Third tunnel, on the left between the two book case looking things." said Harry.

Daphne gaped.

"Now you can't tell anyone about the map or the cloak" said Harry.

"Of course, family magic" said Daphne, nodding, matter-of-factly.

"We really need some way of sending a message to meet up" she said.

"We could use owls" said Harry.

"Please, your owl is very beautiful, but rather distinctive."

"Hedwig. Her name is Hedwig." said Harry.

Daphne smirked "The other woman in your life"

"I already told Hermione to let go" said Harry.

"And how did she take that?" asked Daphne softly.

"It was a bit odd, but I reassured her that she's my best friend, really she's like a sister to me."

Daphne's face blanked. "You said that to her?" she said, pausing.

"Well she's been like a sister to me for years. My second friend ever, really better than Ron."

"Well, I see" said Daphne, holding her head for a second.

"Then she got all caught up in her book for the rest of the trip" said Harry.

Daphne looked at him oddly, and walked off back to her book and chocolates.

-==0==-

The trip back to school was noisy, with everyone showing off their presents.

Hermione seemed preoccupied with books again.

-==0==-

Harry and Daphne ran every other day. It was fun.

They easily managed to stay within arms length.

-==0==-

A few weeks into term, Harry received a heavy book sized parcel from Sirius.

He took care to open it in his bed, with the curtains closed just in case.

It was a pair of mirrors and a letter.

_'Harry, these are communications mirrors. You hold it, and say the name of the other person, and their mirror heats up. We used to use them to talk between detentions and organise pranks. I think you said you needed a way to contact Daphne and vice versa. The one with a stag on it is called Prongs, and the other one is with the awesome grim is called Padfoot. I was going to keep one, but your need is greater, what with the contract starting to really bite after Daphne's birthday._

_When you get called, the mirror heats up._

_Good luck and enjoy the kissing._

_'_

It took a day or so, but Harry managed to slip Daphne a note to meet in the second classroom on the third floor after dinner on Saturday.

-==0==-

"Well what?" she asked. "Are you going to tie me up and ravish me?"

Harry didn't know what to do with that idea, so he pretended it hadn't happened.

"I've got a way for us to communicate quickly" explained Harry.

Harry explained about the communications mirrors.

"These are very rare" said Daphne, relaxing.

"Well, if you need me, just call prongs"

'"Why is it prongs"

"Because my Father was an animagus, in the form of a stag. So antlers, so prongs" said Harry.

"He learned to be an animagus while he was at school?" asked Daphne.

"In fifth year, I think" said Harry.

Daphne pocketed the mirror.

"Whats mine called?"

"Padfoot."

"What's it named after"

"Well, Sirius is an animagus, in the form of a big black dog" said Harry.

Daphne's' eyes grew large "Its… hard to believe."

"Believe it. He licks himself when he's a dog" said Harry.

Daphne snorted then laughed outright. "He doesn't" she said.

"He does. Think's nobody notices if he sits in the corner and does it" said Harry.

"Are you joking?" asked Daphne, flushed from laughing.

"Only a little. His friend Moony makes those jokes."

"Moony?"

"Family friend"

"Who can turn into something too?" asked Daphne.

"No, he's just a werewolf" said Harry drily.

"Oh. Like Professor Lupin" said Daphne, not looking flustered.

"Yes" said Harry. "Not all werewolves are evil, and Moony is very careful to take his Wolfsbane potion and lock himself away."

Daphne looked at Harry with narrowed eyes "There's more to all of this isn't there?" she asked.

"Not my secrets to tell." said Harry.

"I will forever be loyal" said Daphne blandly.

"Oh yeah" said Harry. "Professor Lupin, well he's Moody, my godfathers friend. My father and his friends all learnt to be animagi in fifth year so they could keep Moony company when he transformed. Werewolves won't attack animals."

"Wow."

"They were pretty cool." said Harry.

"Can you get their notes on it?"

"Are you thinking we do it?" asked Harry.

Daphne choked, going red. "I suggest we learn to be animagi" she said.

Harry wondered why she had choked, then realised what he'd said and went beet red.

"Oh I'm sorry I said that"

Daphne laughed. "Harry, you can be so..."

He got a hug, just for saying something embarrassingly bone-headed. This girlfriend business had it's perks. He could do clueless and boneheaded easily.

-==0==-

Harry got a small school journal from Sirius four days later, in response to his letter.

Harry opened the small book. Inside, handwritten, there was a title.

"_The Marauders Guide to becoming an animagus."_

"_So simple even Peter can do it."_

Harry put the book in his robe pocket.

He stayed up late skimming the book. It was… unlike any magic he'd read before.

The Marauders had found the original works on becoming an Animagus, and simplified, cut steps out and added mildly dangerous and painful steps to cut the time and effort.

They were very honest about the awful side effects, but in the inked-in side notes blocks showed how long and involved it was the normal way. Harry almost felt grateful to Peter Pettigrew, for being such a slow study. But… no… he still was glad he'd shot the traitor.

-==0==-

The next day, Harry mirror-called Daphne after training with Moody.

"What?" asked Daphne, from the mirror, "Is everything okay?"

"I've got the Animagus book. My father and his friends have made their own simpler, quicker easier way. They do admit it's painful and a little dangerous. You can read the book yourself."

"Do you know how to duplicate a whole book?" asked Daphne.

"No" said Harry.

"I know a seventh year who does it for ten galleons."

"Meet me in the front hall in fifteen minutes. I'll give you the book and galleons" said Harry.

"Why so late?"

"I had training with Professor Moody." said Harry.

"Whatever are you learning?" asked Daphne inquisitively.

"How to fight. Dirty magical battle tricks" said Harry.

"How ever did you get him to do that?"

"Saved his life" said Harry. "Fifteen minutes."

"It only takes three to get there from the Dorms" said Daphne.

"I've got to come down seven floors, and avoid Filch" said Harry.

…

Daphne took the book and a small bag from Harry, who bowed and pulled his invisibility cloak back on.

"We don't all have invisibility cloaks, Harry" said Daphne, then descended the stairs.

That Friday night Daphne gave Harry back the book, and a small bag of crunchy, rustling things.

"You'll need to make the first potion yourself" she said.

"We aren't doing this together?"

"The first stage is done naked, so no." said Daphne.

Harry snorted and went red.

Daphne left with a flourish of robes.

-==0==-

The day after Daphne's birthday, they met in an abandoned classroom.

"So this is it" said Harry nervously.

"Yes" said Daphne, trying to look calm, but Harry could tell she was nervous too.

"MY first kiss, and it has to be with you" she said.

"What about at Christmas" said Harry. "And when we put our engagement rings on" 

Daphne grinned. "You remembered" she said.

"Hard to forget" said Harry. "First time I've got engaged too."

Daphne rolled her eyes.

"We'll start by hugging." said Daphne.

Harry walked right up to Daphne and they hugged awkwardly.

"Now, we have our first mandatory kiss" said Daphne.

Daphne turned her head sideways a bit and leaned in.

Their lips touched. It felt odd. Daphne smelt of peppermint.

Daphne broke the kiss and sighed "And now we have to swap spit."

Harry felt dubious and it must have showed on his face.

"Oh come on I'm not hideous" said Daphne.

"No, you're very pretty actually" said Harry.

Daphne startled, pulled away from Harry.

"Are you getting weird?" asked Daphne

"We have to kiss and swap spit. In two years we get married . This all weird." said Harry.

Daphne sighed, and leaned forwards.

Harry leaned forward a little and their lips touched. Steeling himself, he stuck out his tongue, and after an awkward moment of pressing his tongue against Daphne's lips, she opened her lips and he got the oddest feeling. After a moment, he pulled his tongue back, and withdrew.

His heart was banging in his chest far too fast.

"That was weird" he groaned.

"You were a typical man. Penetrating the innocent woman" said Daphne. She looked flushed.

Harry felt terrible. He went pale. "I'm sorry, I.. um, we … oh bother." he said.

"And if you think I'm doing that to you!" said Daphne.

"Oh you have to next time, it's your turn." said Harry, dropping the loose hug.

"Ew!" explained Daphne.

"Oh, really, you kissed me first" said Harry.

"Not officially" said Daphne quickly.

"I happen to want to taste sweet things" said Harry.

"That's laughing, you have to make me laugh."

"Whats the penalty for the spit than?" asked Harry

"We get sick and have to hold one another to get better"

"Okay… like I said, two weeks, your turn to do the tongue." said Harry, upset.

"Why are you so upset."

"I really like treacle tart" said Harry.

"Not for much longer, besides, Tiramisu's miles better" said Daphne.

"Tira-what?"

"It's an Italian desert, made of cream, chocolate, coffee cream cake, all in layers"

"And it's sweet?"

"Well, not soon, mister un-funny" said Daphne.

"Ditto" said Harry.

"I am so funny."

"Prove it."

"What do you call a man with no brain" said Daphne.

Harry snorted.

Daphne put her nose in the air.

Harry started to leave

"What about me?" asked Daphne.

"Well, I don't think you need to be any sweeter, princess" said Harry.

Daphne scowled and drew her wand. Her spell faltered as she cast it.

Acting on instinct, Harry cast a tickling curse on Daphne.

Her wand dropped and she jerked about, snorting, then laughing.

Harry stopped the charm.

"A tickling curse! you hit me with a tickling curse!"

"And you laughed!" said Harry.

"Why you!" she said and hit Harry with a tickling charm.

She left the spell on and Harry, after snorting, laughing, slid down to the floor and rolled uncomfortably. "Take it off" Harry begged, his eyes watering.

Daphne lowered her wand.

"You've worked it out" said Daphne.

"You showed me. Can't curse me, not really, can you."

Daphne tried to cast a stinging hex, and it failed.

"Sit down on the floor" said Harry.

"Why?" asked Daphne

"So I can try a stunner" said Harry simply.

"No I'm not getting my robes dirty sitting on the floor." said Daphne.

Harry pointed his wand at a wooden chair, summoned it closer, and scourgify'd it clean.

"A chair" he said.

Daphne sat down gracefully. "And no touching me when I'm out, the contract will hurt you if you try" she said firmly.

Harry gulped "I'd never..." said Harry.

"Good" said Daphne, smiling.

Harry shot a stunner at Daphne and she slumped, unconscious.

A quick 'rennervate' and she was awake. "That's quite unpleasant" she said.

"But we know the limitations of the contract. We can't injure each other, but we can stun, and tickle" said Harry.

"If we ever have to duel in public, you'd better use stunners" said Daphne.

"Understood. But the tickling curse is a neat loophole for the laughing clause" said Harry.

"I'm not so sure it's accidental" muttered Daphne.

"what?"

"Well, I can make you laugh, you just aren't funny." said Daphne blandly.

"My Sirius joke worked." said Harry.

"your dirty joke about your godfather."

"Yes, after all, he turns into a dog, then he goes in the corner and licks his..."

Daphne snorted.

"All our jokes are about your godfather" said Daphne.

"He's larger than life." said Harry.

"What about your dad with "Call me Gary" asked Harry.

Daphne glared at him "That is funny once. He does it over and over again."

Harry snorted, "like Sirius and his "I am Sirius" line.

Daphne frowned

"You ask him if he's joking and he says. "No I'm Sirius.'"

Daphne groaned "Not funny."

"Only once, and you've already heard it twice" said Harry.

"I think it's because he's less funny than me, just like you are" said Daphne.

"Less funny than you?" said Harry.

"What do you call a man with no brain?" asked Daphne.

Harry snorted.

"See, I'm naturally funny, you and Sirius are not." said Daphne, smiling.

"It's lucky for you I'm good at the tickling curse then" said Harry, with a tiny grin.

Daphne frowned, hugged Harry, and left. 'Her hair smells nice.' thought Harry.

-==0==-

**Two weeks later.**

"So, ready?" said Harry.

"Have you cleaned your teeth?"

Harry looked guilty.

"The charm is recens spiritus, just point your wand in your mouth."

Harry casts the spell and it's faintly tingly in his mouth.

He stares pointedly at Daphne.

She huffs and casts the spell.

They advance and hug loosely.

"Remember, you do the tongue" said Harry.

Daphne stood there stiffly.

"Hey, the kiss?"

"You're the boy. You lean forwards."

"Oh no. equality in all things. I did it last time, you do it this time."

Daphne blinked at him "Equality in all things?"

"Oh course, how else"? said Harry.

Daphne leaned forwards and kissed Harry, and for a moment, it wasn't weird, then the tongue thing. And the spit, and she leaned back.

Harry let go and stepped back, wishing it had lasted longer.

"Maybe we should do it again, to be sure" said Harry.

Daphne gingerly repeated the kiss, and Harry held her more firmly. It was… nicer than last time.

"Now, if you could make me laugh, Miss Greengrass." asked Harry.

"What do you call a man with no brain?" asked Daphne.

Harry snorted.

"Like hexing fish in a barrel" she said, proudly.

"How's the tiramisu?" asked Harry.

"The elves only make it infrequently" she said, with a sigh.

"So do you need a laugh?" he asked.

"Oh get on with it" she said crossly. "I had to use three sugars in my tea this morning."

"How do you find an old man in the dark?" asked Harry.

"huh"

"It's not hard" said Harry.

Daphne stared for a second, then went pink and snorted.

"Where did you get that?" she said, laughing.

"Dorm. I just asked for someone to tell a joke" said Harry, smiling.

Daphne shook her head. "That was awful", she said, still laughing.

"Oh, that's a nice joke, Seamus told me a limerick, and it's too dirty to repeat"

Daphne's eyes grew large as saucers.

"I couldn't tell it to a girl" said Harry, blushing

"That bad?" she asked.

"Worse" said Harry.

"Tell me anyway!" said Daphne.

"There was a young nympho named Jill, – " recited Harry, red-faced.

Daphne look at Harry aghast, and just stared.

Daphne spoke "You really did just tell that joke"

Harry nodded, feeling awful.

Daphne shuddered "Don't ever tell me a joke that dirty again. Not till we're… you know… "

"Sorry Dear" said Harry, and hugged Daphne. She hugged him back.

"You're not so bad" said Daphne. "But that Seamus is a bad influence"

Harry snorted. If she knew about the magazines Seamus had… she'd flip.

-==0==-

Harry finished the last animagus potion in the series of seven potions. It left him unable to speak for a day, with shaking hands and a pounding headache. Notes in the book indicated this was normal.

As soon as he felt he could talk, the next evening he mirror-called Daphne.

"Daphneee" he slurred.

Daphne blinked at him "Are you ill?"

"I took the last potion in the series two days ago. Couldn't even speak yesterday." Harry concentrated on his enunciation.

Daphne shuddered. "I was going to take it tonight"

"The side-effects… they pass" said Harry "It's okay. You'll feel bad, but in a day or so you;ll be fine. Expect shaking hands, headache and a day unable to speak."

"You're not selling it well" she said.

"Well, apparently if I meditate with a mandrake leaf, I'll have a vision of my form. After that, one more potion and I can transform." said Harry.

"You're only days away?" said Daphne sharply.

"I think so."

"Well, I need to go take that potion. I'm not being last at this."

...

Harry put off meditation till the next night before sleep.

He put the leaf in his mouth and as the book said, closed his eyes, and thought of a blank, black void. It was terribly hard to keep thinking of blankness. Eventually, the weird taste of the leaf had him open his eyes. He was in a blank, black void. That seemed… very odd.

In front of him sat an animal. It was there… but not there, and he could see it… but it was made of blank blackness too. Finally, the weird taste in his mouth fizzed oddly, and the animal was clearly visible to him, as a dog, a mean-looking dog, bigger than Aunt Marge's Ripper, with vertical stripes, a tattered ear, a squinty eye and slightly a crooked front left leg. The dog snarled, it's teeth jagged.

'I'm a dog.' thought Harry, and fainted.

-==0==-

Friday came and Harry went to the room to dance with Daphne.

Daphne folded her arms "Well, what are you" she asked.

"I'm a dog" said Harry. Daphne's lips twitched. "I see. Have you done a transformation yet?"

"Er, no" said Harry. "The book does say to have someone to cast the spell if I get stuck."

"Mhmm" hummed Daphne. "I suppose I can do it for you" she said, and took her copy of the book out of her robe pocket. And checked the bookmarked page. "Okay, I'm sure I know this" she said.

Harry licked his lips "I'm… not sure I'm going to be calm, can you be ready with a stunner" he admitted.

Daphne tilted her head "Your animagus isn't a calm dog. Mine… " she stopped. "You'll see later."  
she said.

Harry took his wand and concentrated, eyes closed. He started to shrink, dissolving downwards and turning brown, turning into a dog, on it's hind legs, that fell over. The dog stood up, it's brown fur mixed with black along it's back, it's right ear tattered, left front leg crooked, one eye squinty. It growled at Daphne.

"Harry!" said Daphne "You are a human in dog form. You are not going to growl at or bite me" she said, wand extended. The dog growled, it's cracked teeth showing, and lowered a bit on shaking legs.

Daphne shot a stupefy at the dog and it collapsed. She took a deep breath and cast a blue spell on the dog. Like a tree growing impossibly fast, the dog turned into an unconscious Harry lying on the ground.

Daphne sat down on a desk, her arms crossed. After a few minutes of glaring at Harry ,she cast "Ennervate" and Harry groaned.

"Did you get the number of that lorry" he asked, looking up.

"What was that about!" said Daphne stiffly. "You turned into a dog, then were about to bite me."  
Harry looked at Daphne sulkily "I don't know. The stupid dog form was growling when I first saw it in the vision."

Daphne opened the book and flicked though it. "There's nothing in the book about this." she said after a while. Harry got up, slowly and went and sat on a chair.

"Until you know why your dog form is so aggressive, and can control it, kindly do not use it near me" said Daphne.

"Yeah, okay. I don't like being the dog anyway" said Harry.

Daphne looked Harry right in the eyes "The dog is a reflection of your inner animal. What is wrong with you?" she said.

"I dunno." said Harry, avoiding eye contract.

"Don't give me that, that, horse feathers Harry." said Daphne.

"I didn't have a very happy childhood okay." said Harry. "Can we drop this please."

Daphne muttered to her self.

"What?" said Harry.

'How did the other me ever think you were the greatest man she ever met' thought Daphne. "You're a moody arse."

"Well, not everyone's had your wonderful upbringing, princess" said Harry.

"Are you trying to irritate me" asked Daphne, drawing her wand.

"Just back off a bit" said Harry.

Daphne sat and took deep breaths, in and out.

"What are you doing?" asked Harry.

"Meditating to even my mood" said Daphne. "An old friend told me to do it, to not be so."

"Bithcy?" asked Harry.

"Catty" said Daphne, lip twitching.

"So what's your form" asked Harry.

Daphne sat up off the desk, and knelt on the floor, then took a four-legged stance.

"You're four legged then" said Harry, drawing his wand.

Daphne concentrated, and shrank, her hair colour spreading and fading a bit until she was a… long-haired white cat.

"Mreow" said Daphne, tail up and walked over to Harry, and rubbed her head against his legs. Harry unconsciously reached down and stroked her head and back. Daphne arched into it, then drew back and jumped onto Harry's lap, and lay down.

Harry rolled his eyes and stroked the cat. After a short time, Daphne purred.

Half an hour of stroking Daphne the cat later, Harry said "Well, that was nice, for you, can you get off?"

The cat reached out a fluffy paw and extended razor sharp claws, then retracted her paw, and leapt off Harry's lap, trotted several feet away, and turned back into Daphne Greengrass, who was lying on the floor.

She got up off the floor and cast a cleaning charm on her robes.

Harry looked down at his black school robes. They were covered in white fur.

"You shed" said Harry.

"Hnh!" snorted Daphne "I am an elegant cat, you need to learn cleaning charms" she drawled.

"You're being cat-like" said Harry.

"I am not" she drawled, then put her hand to her mouth in embarrassment.

Harry ineffectually brushed cat-hair off his robes.

Daphne took the music box out of her robe pocket and set it on the nearby desk.

They danced. Harry was silent.

Finally Daphne stopped dancing.

"What is it?"

"I'm fine" said Harry.

"Okay, don't tell me. Write Sirius a letter, explain about your dog. Maybe he'll have an idea." said Daphne.

"Yeah okay" mumbled Harry.

Daphne hugged Harry and kissed him on the cheek "You give good back-rubs" she said, picked up the music box and left.

Harry wandered back to the Gryffindor common room.

"Harry, you've got cat hair on you" said Hermione.

"Yeah, Daphne's got a cat" said Harry blandly.

Hermione picked up Crookshanks "See crooksie, she's not all bad, she like cats" said Hermione, stroking Crookshanks.

Harry rolled his eyes, Hermione was being 'accepting'. He went up to bed.

He was just about to go to sleep when his mirror heated up.

"What is it?" said Harry, suddenly worried. Daphne appeared, in a nightgown. Harry tried not to stare.

"Don't forget to write to Sirius" she said, stretchered, in a fascinating way and ended the mirror call.

Harry very awkwardly got out of bed, got some parchment and a quill and wrote a letter to Sirius. Hedwig could take it tomorrow.

-==0==-

Sirius's reply, one day later was remarkably quick and short.

"_Harry, _

_Go to Hogsmeade immediately. I'll be waiting at the Three Broomsticks._

_Sirius"_

Considering it was Sunday, and not a Hogsmeade weekend, Harry took the tunnel to Honeydukes.

With his invisibility cloak, he slipped out of the shop unseen and got to the Three Broomsticks.

An anxious looking Sirius Black waited in a booth, drinking tea.

Harry slipped into the booth and removed his invisibility cloak.

Sirius, after a seconds hesitation, wrapped Harry in a hug.

"You did it. And younger than we did" he said. "I'm proud of you, and your dad would be proud too" said Sirius.

"Well, yeah" said Harry. "But, your note made it seem urgent."

"Yeah, we're going on a quick trip" said Sirius, standing up.

"Where to?" asked Harry, following Sirius to the fireplace.

"To St Mungos" said Sirius, throwing floo powder in the fire.

Harry followed Sirius, spinning through the disorienting green of the floo network to land in a light green hallway, with several fireplaces.

"St Mungos hospital for magical maladies" said a witch in green robes "How can we help?"

"My boy needs to see a mind healer" said Sirius seriously.

"Oh yes, mister?"

"Lord Black" said Sirius. "As soon as possible, please" said Sirius firmly.

Harry and Sirius waited in a large waiting room, sparsely populated with witches, wizards and children with mostly odd magical problems, like one fellow with purple tentacles instead of hair, a witch with one arm constantly burning with blue fire ( though she seemed unhurt by it), and an elderly wizard coughing up small pigs.

"Swine flu" said Sirius to Harry in explanation.

"Why is this so urgent, I'm fine" said Harry.

Sirius pulled out his wand and cast a spell.

"Privacy charm" said Sirius. "Harry, your animagus form, it's a reflection of your inner animal. If your inner animal is injured, and you're not… then you're hurting, on the inside." At this, Sirius touched his own heart. "And not being able to control the aggression of your animal… even after Azkaban, I wasn't out of control as Padfoot."

"So what's a mind healer going to do? Ask me about my feelings?" said Harry bitterly.

Sirius gave Harry a shake of the head "No, probably just a potion."

"A what"

"Potion. You learn to make them at school" said Sirius.

"I thought… I mean, normal people… they talk to psychiatrists about their problems, then get told it's all because they love their mothers" said Harry, drawing on his experience of TV shows and movies.

Sirius laughed "Well, your Daphne's not much like Lily, so you're safe there"

"What was mum like?" asked Harry.

"Lily Evans was a goody-goody, who was good at charms, okay at potions, and had a vicious temper when roused." said Sirius. "Obviously, she was a prefect."

"Mum was a prefect?"

"She'd be disappointed if you weren't. You dad wasn't though, so don't worry about it."

Harry nodded and relaxed. Sirius pounced "Then your dad was made head boy."

"He wasn't" said Harry… 'Dad wasn't a git like Percy, was he?'

"He was as shocked as you. He'd been Quidditch captain for two years, and then out of the blue, He was head boy. Of course your mum was head girl."

"Mum was head girl?"

"Your dad had only just stopped goofing off, trying to get some NEWTs, his dad, your granddad might have had words after sixth year."

"What happened in sixth year?"

"We broke the detentions record" said Sirius fondly. "Most detentions ever given."

"You mean you got caught?" asked Harry

Sirius snorted. "Oh I wish James was here to hear that. Derision from wee Harry. He'd be so… proud I suspect. Your mum would… she would probably give you a big hug."

Sirius stopped, his eyes watering. "You mum never got caught for anything."

"But she was a goody goody" said Harry.

"Until roused up. I believe she was the mysterious source of knee-reversal jinxes." said Sirius.

"Ouch" said Harry.

"Mostly your dad, after, um… pranking" said Sirius.

"Lord Black" called a green robed witch.

"Come on Harry, lets to" said Sirius standing up.

Harry returned to Hogwarts infirmary via floo, with a letter to Madam Pomfrey and a box of potion vials. He'd had one absolutely foul tasting one at St Mungos already. Sirius had made it up to him by buying him brunch in the St Mungos cafeteria. Brunch with everything.

"Mister Potter!" said Madam Pomfrey, as Harry tumbled out of the floo "Whatever are you doing here" she said.

Harry handed her the letter.

She read the letter, her expression of annoyance and surprise melting into anger. "I will be checking daily that you are taking your potions, Mister Potter. Now go back to your Dormitory."

Harry sloped off, glad not to be forced into a bed, for once.

Harry cut through the common room but was intercepted by Ron

"Hey, Harry, where have you been?" asked Ron

"Hospital. I have to take some potions for a month" Harry said, then sighed.

"What for?" asked Ron tactlessly.

"I'd rather not say, okay" said Harry.

"Yeah okay" said Ron, backing off.

Harry went up the stairs.

"Harry's under a lot of stress, Ron" said Hermione from a desk where she was working on an essay.

"Yeah I suppose" said Ron, "Who wants to play chess" he asked the room.

Harry put his potions box in his trunk, got out a textbook he needed to read a chapter of for the next essay, and went downstairs to sit in an armchair.

An hour or two later, the portrait hole opened, and a third year girl came in, followed by a white cat. The cat walked around the room, exploring.

"Whose cat is that" asked one of the prefects.

Crookshanks strutted over to the white cat. The white cat hissed at the much larger Crookshanks, who backed off.

"Oh crooksie, did the mean cat hiss at you?" said Hermione, picking up Crookshanks, and cuddling him.

Daphne the cat walked over to Harry and jumped onto his lap, and settled in, one paw extended to stab Harry at any time.

"Oh Harry, that cat knows you?" said Fay.

"Yeah, It's Daphne Greengrasses" said Harry.

Head turned (mostly female).

The cat extended one claw and gave Harry a tiny stab.

Harry started stoking the cat while he read. After a while, she started to purr.

"How do you know Greengrass?" asked Pavarti Patil.

"We're stuck in a cursed marriage contract. It's been in the paper twice" said Harry.

"Ew" said Pavarti.

"She has her good points" said Harry, stroking a purring cat. Daphne the cat rubbed her head on Harry's hand.

Harry sat in the chair, stroking Daphne the cat. She purred. And shed a little.

"How does Daphne Greengrass keep the cat hair off her robes. They're never furry?" asked Hermione.

"Magic" said Harry.

Hermione left immediately for the library.

Harry snorted.

An hour later, she returned with a parchment in her hand.

"Evanescunt capillus solutam" intoned Hermione, and the orange hairs from Crookshanks vanished off her robes.

"Oy, Granger, cast it on the couches" said one of the sixth years. "All the cats have shed on it"

Hermione went around the room, and cleaned them up.

Hermione came and demonstrated the charm to Harry. Harry cast it on the cat.

With a ripple of magic running across her fur, the cat looked up at Harry accusingly. Harry stroked her head behind her ears.

She butted his hand and went back to purring.

"That cat really likes you" said Neville.

"She grows on you" admitted Harry.

-==0==-

The year dragged on.

OWLs loomed.

Hermione started to lose it.

Harry finished the potions.

Harry found running every other morning was good.

He was running along when he looked over and found himself admiring Daphne's running body.

She was getting curves in places. 'Snap out it' he thought., and sped up.

Half-term came and all the fifth years stayed at Hogwarts, cramming.

Harry's mirror heated up

He dashed up the stairs from the common room to his dorm and answered "Hi" into the mirror.

Daphne glared at him through the tiny frame "Room 31 on level four. I can't taste sugar, and I feel like I'm coming down with something."

Harry recovered his books and notes and bolted out the portrait hole.

He made good time, the school halls were free of traffic and once he got to the fourth floor he pulled on his cloak.

Daphne was standing in room 31, which had a surprising set of metal benches instead of desks.

"Hello" he said, taking off the cloak.

"A joke. Now!"

"Why do mice have little balls?" Harry asked.

Daphne frowned.

"Because they like to dance" he finished.

She looked at him and shook her head.

"Why did the widow wear black garters?"

Daphne rolled her eyes.

"In memory of those who had passed beyond" said Harry.

She snorted.

"I broke my finger last week" said Harry.

Daphne shrugged

"On the other hand, I'm okay" he said.

She snorted again. "Your dorm mates are terrible jokers."

"What do you call a pony with a cough?" asked Harry.

She shrugged.

"A little hoarse." said Harry.

She snorted again "Potter, you're sad."

Harry walked over and held her gently. She sighed.

"I'd like a real hug, a real kiss, from a real boyfriend, not because of a cursed contract."

"Well, we don't always get what we want in life Daphne." said Harry, and kissed her gently, then stroked her hair. Daphne leaned into the stroke, then pulled back, startled.

"Hey, you didn't do the spit" she said, wide-eyed.

Harry reached up with one hand, held the back of Daphne's head and kissed her firmly, with tongue.

He released her, and she stared at him "That was a bit.. much" she said, blinking and breathing deeply.

"I thought, what would a kiss be like, if it wasn't just a workaround for a curse" said Harry.

"I'm not really ready for that kind of kiss" said Daphne shyly.

"How's revision going?" asked Harry, changing the subject.

"Fine" said Daphne.

"So not great then" said Harry.

"Potions is hard to revise" said Daphne.

"Do you really want to do NEWT potions?" asked Harry.

"No." said Daphne

"Then do a good job, and accept that you might not get an E or an O in it."

"When did you suddenly get a grip on life?" asked Daphne.

"I dunno. The potions seem to have helped" admitted Harry.

"Potions?" said Daphne, precisely.

"From St Mungos. Sirius took me there, to a mind healer, they gave me months of potions." admitted Harry.

"You didn't tell me" said Daphne.

"It's done now, I'll tell you next time I have an embarrassing medical condition" said Harry.

"You'd better!" said Daphne, then blushed "Especially if..." she stopped, blushing furiously.

Harry scratched his head. "When I leave Hogwarts, I can probably live alright, I have a place to live, and enough money for food. Why worry?"

"What about me?" asked Daphne.

"Well, you're only a girl, so you don't eat much..." said Harry, yelping as he got poked in the ribs.

"Seriously, Can you support me?" she asked.

"I've got a vault full of gold and I'm heir to Sirius. I could get a job, I suppose." said Harry.

"You haven't thought about life at all?" asked Daphne.

"I wasn't expecting to have one. He-who-shall-not-be-named kept trying to kill me. The Basilisk alone nearly did."

"Basilisk?"

"Killed one in the Chamber of secrets" said Harry.

"Is it still there?" asked Daphne. "We can sell it through father for, well, lots of galleons"

"Probably, only I can open the chamber" said Harry.

"You're the Heir of Slytherin?" asked Daphne, looking a bit surprised.

"I'm an heir, maybe. Lord you-know-who was in charge of the basilisk." said Harry, waving a hand dismissively.

"Well, I suppose we could see.." said Harry.

"Now?" asked Daphne.

"Why not, it'll only take an hour or so. We need to take a broom." said Harry.

Harry gave Daphne the cloak and went back to Griffindor tower and got his broom.

When he emerged from the portrait hole, he said softly "You there?"

Daphne replied from behind him "Your dorm is very messy" she said dismissively.

"It's the other guys" lied Harry.

"Learn to be tidy." said Daphne firmly.

Harry waved his hand "Come on" and led the way to Myrtles bathroom.

"Moaning Myrtles bathroom" said Daphne.

"Yeah the chamber entrance is here" said Harry.

Daphne squeaked when the sink opened. "You… the…."

"Yeah, so now we slide" said Harry.

The Basilisk in the chamber was long, green and dead.

The cool temperatures or perhaps the magical nature of the beast had preserved it.

"It's like it died yesterday" said Daphne.

"Oh this brings back bad memories" said Harry, trying to keep it together.

"How did you kill it anyway?" she asked.

"I rammed the sword of Godric Griffindor up through its brain." said Harry bluntly.

"How do you do that without getting bitten?" asked Daphne.

"I don't know. Phoenix tears heal almost everything." said Harry, wishing he was somewhere else.

Daphne looked at Harry "you really are impossibly brave, aren't you."

Harry pulled up his sleeve "See, here's the scar" he said.

Daphne stared, then touched the scar. "Wow" she said. "Never take a risk like that again" she said firmly. Well how can we get this to my Father?" asked Daphne.

"I've got an idea." said Harry.

"Dobby!" Harry called.

Dobby appeared, wearing a woolly hat and a jersey.

"Master Harry Potter sir, Such a great wizard you are, So glad to see you Dobby is." said Dobby.

"Dobby, can you move this snake to Daphne Greengrasses father"

"Greenygrasses, Dobby knows them" nodded Dobby.

Daphne frowned "Why do you have a Malfoy house-elf?"

Dobby turned and berated Daphne "Dobby is a Free Elf, Dobby works for Hogwarts and gets paid, and works for Mister Harry Potter, and gets paid for that too" said Dobby.

"Dobby, this is Daphne Greengrass. We're engaged, I guess. So one day we'll be married" said Harry.

"Master Harry Potter is so Great. Greenygrass will be Potter one day." said Dobby insanely.

"Yes Dobby but not for a few more years" said Harry.

"Does Great Master Harry Potter want the snake moved now?" asked Dobby.

"If you would, Dobby. Tell Mister Greengrass Harry Potter sends his regards" said Harry.

"Master Harry Potter Sir, It may take Dobby some time to move the snake" admitted the house-elf.

"Take your time Dobby." said Harry gently.

"Well, that's the Chamber of secrets" said Harry.

"Does it have any other secrets?" asked Daphne.

"I don't know." said Harry. "I was in a hurry."

"We're coming back to search this place properly" said Daphne. "There might be secret doors."

"Apparecium" cast Harry. "No, doesn't look like it" he said.

Daphne laughed "Harry, you're just.. you're funny."

"You're welcome" said Harry.

"Harry, I have to tell you something. It's a secret."

"Well, we're in the chamber of secrets" said Harry and waggled his eyebrows.

"Just before father got told about the contract, I got a letter." said Daphne, looking nervous.

"A letter?"

"I got a letter from, well, Daphne Greengrass in the future. She's used a time machine to illegally send me a letter, about, well, you and me." said Daphne.

"Oh" said Harry "Do we not get on well" he said sadly.

"I, uh… I know we will work out Harry. We have our own love story. That's all I can say now." said Daphne, and fidgeted.

-==0==-

The day after OWLS exams started, Harry was finishing breakfast when an eagle owl dropped off a letter for him.

He picked it up

_'Harry Potter,_

_Dear Harry._

_I was somewhat surprised to find a Dead giant basilisk outside my house._

_The elf said It was Harry Potter sending it, but was a bit incoherent._

_I've got it in a warehouse, and have experts harvesting it._

_It looks like Greengrass Potion ingredients will have Basilisk venom for sale for some time._

_You stand to make a fortune from this. So I'll never bother asking if you can support Daphne._

_Well done._

_Cyrus Greengrass_

_P.S. Over a million galleons, and still rising. Well done indeed._

_'_

Harry snorted, and looked over at the Slytherin tables. Daphne Greengrass had just finished folding up a letter and putting it in her robes. She glanced in his direction, and smiled smugly.

-==0==-

Harry and Ron watched Hermione wind tighter and tighter over the OWLS exams.

Harry found the exams difficult. Running was helping him, and kissing Daphne was really, not a terrible chore. Waking up dreaming about kissing Daphne, was a little odd. Stroking the white cat, was… nice if a bit weird. Once she started purring, she was very soothing.

Nothing was left inside him at the end of exams. He felt like burnt out match. He just wanted to get on the train and go home.

Hermione kept discussing exam questions obsessively with anyone. Exams were over, couldn't she let it go?

Harry knew he needed to catch up with Daphne again, the Treacle tart was starting to lose it's sweetness again. He went to his bed, closed the curtains and got out the mirror. "Padfoot" he called.

The mirror waited, reflective. Harry waited. After ten minutes, he got out the map and looked for her instead. She was in the Slytherin dorms, in a group of names he recognised as his year.

He called out again "Padfoot". Finally her footprints moved, and went to what he guessed by it's size was a bathroom.

The mirror cleared and he saw Daphne, in a bathroom stall.

"What is it Harry" she said crossly.

"I need to see you. I can't taste sugar" said Harry.

"I'm busy. With my friends" said Daphne petulantly "We're having a party."

"Oh, I … well , see you later" said Harry.

"On the train" said Daphne and the mirror went back to being a mirror.

-==0==-

Harry thought hard about seeing Daphne on the train and decided to go do it.

Hermione was reading a book, but fell asleep once the train started moving.

Harry got up and left the compartment.

He found Daphne with a brown haired witch he didn't know, Pansy, who he hated, and Lily moon, who he didn't really know, but she had a distinctive name.

Harry opened the compartment "Ladies" he said.

Pansy spoke up "Potter, go die in a fire."

Harry smiled "Much as I enjoy your repartee, Pansy, I'm here for Daphne."

Daphne looked up "Harry" she said.

Harry held out a hand "If you would" he asked.

Daphne took his hand and stood up.

"Make this good" whispered Daphne as she slid the compartment doors shut behind her "I don't want Pansy giving me shit about the kiss. Give me the works."

Harry smiled slightly "Sure" he said, and wrapped one arm around Daphne's waist and the other into her long hair. He pulled Daphne into a kiss and put his heart and soul into it. And, his tongue into Daphne toward the end, and ended, with Daphne partly leaned over. He thought he heard Daphne groan slightly.

He helped her upright, and she was looking flushed and her lips looked pink. "Oh well done" she murmured and said louder "So what do you call a man with no brain?"

Harry laughed. Daphne smirked "I'm the funniest" she said.

"You are my beautiful, devious, sneaky brilliant betrothed" said Harry. "Oh and look at Pansy" he whispered.

Daphne looked into the compartment and saw Pansy, looking blank-faced, her mouth open.

Daphne laughed "An excellent snog Harry" said Daphne, blushing a little.

"Oh you" said Harry, and kissed her on the cheek "See you soon" he murmured.

Harry floated back to the compartment he'd started the trip in.

Hermione was sleeping still.

Harry was still tired and he dozed off too.

Harry awoke to Ron shaking his shoulder. Damn, the dream had been really good too.

"Harry, it's the trolley witch. D'ya want some sweets?" said Ron softly.

"Oh Ron, for old times sake… I'll just get everything" said Harry quickly.

Ron waved to the trolley witch, and Harry gave her a galleon.

"Harry, are you feeling alright?" asked Ron, staring at the pile of sweets.

Harry sat down on the seat, like his heart was racing like a snitch. "Fine Ron, Wanna play Bertie bots challenge?"

"You're on!" said Ron.

Five minutes later, Harry got earwax. "Erk earwax" said Harry.

Four beans later, Ron got vomit. "Oh, vomit" he said.

Eight beans later "Catfood" groaned Harry.

"Honestly why you two buy those!" grouched Hermione, who must have woken up.

Harry handed her a sugar quill. And suddenly got a feeling, like there was a disturbance in the universe. "Gotta go" said Harry.

"It's probably those beans" said Hermione, as Harry slid the door shut behind him and dashed off down the train.

He caught up with the trolley witch right at the end of the train.

"Oh dear, you can't want more, you bought one of everything" said the witch.

"Forgot to get my girlfriend sweets" said Harry.

The witch nodded.

"Five sugar quills and an extra large Honeydukes choc mint block" said Harry, throwing down a galleon and running off.

He slowed down and got his breath back, sliding Daphne's compartment door open in a casual manner.

"Potter" said Pansy bitterly.

"Something for all of you" said Harry, putting the sugar quills on the table "And this for Daphne" he said, handing a sleepy looking Daphne the chocolate block. Her eyes lit up. "Thank you" she said.

"Ahem," said Harry, holding out a hand.

Daphne got up, and stepped out with him, closing the door "You've had your kiss and laugh" said Daphne, hands on hips.

"I was hoping for a kiss, I brought you chocolate" said Harry.

Daphne rolled her eyes and leaned over, giving Harry a firm kiss on the lips.

Harry smiled.

"I won't be bought with Honeydukes" said Daphne.

"I know" said Harry "But DeThierry's."

"You keep my secrets, Mister Potter" said Daphne.

"I wouldn't mind stroking your cat" said Harry.

Daphne snorted "Why would I do that?"

"You come to the common room three nights a week to get kitty stroked." said Harry.

"Kitty?" asked Daphne.

"Well, what's her name?" asked Harry.

"Izzy" said Daphne "My middle name is Isobel, so my cat form is Izzy."

"Well If Izzy wants an hour of stroking, my lap will be back that way" said Harry and left.

He missed seeing Daphne flounce into the compartment and sit regally.

Harry went back to the compartment, again.

"Your stomach okay now" asked Ron.

"Yeah" said Harry, leaned back and rested.

Izzy turned up ten minutes later, and stayed till Harry's arm was nearly falling off "Push off you, my arm's dead" he said. Izzy butted his hand, hopped down and Ron let the cat out.

Harry went to sleep.

Harry awoke and the train had stopped. Hermione was getting her trunk down; probably that or Crookshanks that had woken him.

Next to him, Ron drooled on the bench seat.

Harry sighed and stood up, getting his trunk down.

"Ron, wake up" said Hermione, shaking his shoulder gently.

Harry looked at his friends, and suddenly saw, in the tender look on Hermione's face, love. It was then that Harry realised that Harry, Ron and Hermione was soon going to be Hermione and Ron, with Harry. Harry's heart did a little skip. He was going to marry Daphne Greengrass, and they got on pretty well… and her kisses make his heart feel like a snitch in flight.

Harry led the way to the exit, trying to give Ron a moment with Hermione.

-==0==-

Harry side-along apparated to Grimmauld place, with Sirius.

"How did OWLS go Harry?" asked Sirius.

"I feel empty" he said.

"No snogging on the train?"

Harry blushed "A couple of kisses, yeah."

"Harry, Daphne Greengrass is a fine looking young witch," said Sirius, trying to cheer Harry up.

"Yeah" said Harry, suddenly wanting privacy.

"Harry, at least sniff the potion" said Sirius.

"It's not keyed" said Harry, who had read the instructions.

"Best time to sniff it" said Sirius.

Harry opened his trunk, rummaged in the sock pile and found the bottle. He uncorked it and sniffed. Harry sudden thought of kissing Daphne, peppermint, parchment and chocolate.

"I couldn't say" said Harry, blushing.

Sirius laughed at Harry.

"Speaking of which, where's my new step-mother?" asked Harry.

"I, er, haven't found anyone who'd, well" muttered Sirius.

"Nobody will date you" said Harry snidely.

-==0==-

**Greengrass Manor, a few days later.**

Harry and Daphne sit in a drawing room. Harry's wearing a jacket and jeans, Daphne's in casual robes.

"So, we're going horse riding" said Daphne.

"Yeah" said Harry nodding.

Daphne nodded.

Harry took a box of chocolate out of his jacket.

"DeThierry's!" said Daphne.

Harry winked.

"Would Izzy like a stoke?" asked Harry.

"Perhaps" said Daphne, and transformed into Izzy the cat. She leapt on the Harry's lap and twitched her ears. Harry stroked the cat for a while, till she'd purred for a while. It was kind-of weird, thinking that this cute cat he was stroking was his, girlfriend. Izzy seemingly accidentally leaned a paw on Harry's growing embarrassment. After a minute more stoking, she jumped off his lap, transforming in midair into Daphne.

"I'll meet you out by the stables in five minutes" said Daphne, leaving the room.

Harry walked through the increasingly familiar house, and waited by the stables. One of the horses stared at him "Oh hi, I rode you that one time" said Harry.

"They don't understand that" said Daphne from behind him. He jumped.

Daphne had put on Jodhpurs and a jacket. She looked… curvier than last year.

Harry did what he was told, and Daphne did all the fiddly bits and they got two horses saddled.

Daphne slid up the horse and sat astride it. Harry pulled himself up the horse with great difficulty.

The rode off, Daphne holding the reins of his horse.

They went up the hill, around it and looked out over the Greengrasses estate. Daphne manoeuvred her horse somehow and ended up sitting right next to Harry.

Daphne leaned over and pecked Harry on the cheek "You've been a very attentive boyfriend. Well done" she said. Harry felt happy.

"Get off the horse" said Daphne.

"Why"

"Because you can't lean over without falling off" said Daphne, and with a flash of jodhpur clad-leg,slid down the far side of her horse.

Harry climbed down. Down was easier.

Daphne wrapped the horses reins around a branch and stepped over and kissed him.

They kissed for a while, purely for medical reasons and stopped, both breathing deeply.

Harry felt better than he had all year. "That was the right dose, I think" said Harry, opening his eyes. Daphne looked a bit flushed and her lips were pink and swollen.

"Yes, that was the right dose" said Daphne, stepping back.

"So, two weeks is now too long between doses, isn't it" said Harry.

Daphne nodded "Sweetness only lasts a week or so." she said glumly.

"The cold-like symptoms, they start in around a week" said Harry.

Daphne glared at him "That depends if I'm on my monthly or not." she said bitterly.

Harry gulped. "I'm sorry, I didn't realise"

"So I don't just feel bloated and irritable, I feel like I've got a cold, all because I need to kiss you." said Daphne. Harry nodded "Just mirror call me. In fact, call me in three days, we can tell jokes and taste sugar."

"Oh thank you" said Daphne "Helping out a poor woman who just want to curl up with a hot water bottle and some ice-cream."

"Well, if that's what you want to do, I'll get on out. We've done what we had to" said Harry.

"Oh I'm not on my monthly right now" said Daphne, with a grin.

"Oh I thought..." said Harry.

Daphne laughed, then unbuttoned her jacket.

Harry's mouth opened, his eyes glazed over. Boobs. He could see boobs. She wasn't wearing a shirt under the jacket.. and that bra was… indecent… fantastic… should be mandatory.

Daphne winked and did up her jacket.

"Now, Harry, was that kiss on the train really the best you could do?" she asked.

"I can only try" said Harry, blood loss making him stupid.

Five minutes later Daphne Greengrass pressed a hand against Harry's chest "Stop now" she said as Harry stood up. She was flushed, her eyes shone and her lips were bruised. Harry's hands let go of her jodhpurs. "Well," she said, panting. "You'd better go home soon" she said. "And take care of yourself" she said and snorted. Harry leaned over and breathed in her ear. She shuddered. "Not now" she said stiffly.

"Well, lets ride these horses down to the stables" said Harry.

"Oh I'll be staying on the horse" said Daphne. "I think I need to ride some more."

Harry's mouth dropped open. "Urk" he said, his imagination finally tipping him off.

-==0==-

Daphne dreamed of holding a man, kissing him, feeling love. In the dream, obviously the hugs were Harry's, because he was the only man she'd hugged, and the kisses were Harry's; she had no other reference but the love… well, it probably Harry's big kiss on the hill.

She got up and went to her dresser and sniffed her own bottle of Amortentia again. Sweat, beeswax and treacle tart. She'd burnt the letter after memorising the key details, as instructed.

-==0==-

Sirius took Harry to the (still slightly smelly) Drawing room the day he got home.

"Now, turn into your animagus form" said Sirius.

Harry sighed "I've only done it twice" he said.

Sirius rolled his eyes "Get on with it" he said, pulling his wand.

Harry concentrated and turned into the dog.

Sirius looked at the slightly striped brown dog sitting awkwardly on the floor. He noted it's torn ear, broken and re-healed leg and general attitude. The dog looked at Sirius and lowered itself.

Sirius spoke up "Harry, nobody's going to hurt you. It's safe to be yourself."

The dog looked at Sirius with green eyes.

"Arf?" it barked.

"Yes. Arf" said Sirius, and suddenly there were two dogs, one a big black wolfhound, the other smaller, but heavily built and rough.

"Arf" went Padfoot.

"Arrrf" went the smaller dog.

A hour later, the air in the drawing room was full of horsehair, and the couches and several tables and cabinets were destroyed. The two dogs turned back into wizards.

"I never did like any of this stuff" said Sirius, and started vanishing it.

Harry stood, looking confused. "Why did we do that?"

"Because we felt like it" said Sirius. "Being a dog is about feeling."

"Daphne's a white cat" blurted out Harry.

Sirius laughed, and couldn't stop "Oh Harry" he gasped "That's priceless, Cats and Dogs."

"I dunno, she's nice to stroke."

"Harry, are you stoking Daphne Greengrasses Pussy?" asked Sirius, and collapsed, laughing on the floor.

Harry, looking like he'd eaten a lemon, kicked his godfather (almost gently) while he was down.

**-==0==-**

**Sixth year**

Remus came back to Grimmauld place a few days before Harry left. He sniffed Harry and looked at him with kind eyes "Oh Harry, who is she" asked the werewolf.

Harry was haunted by the words, and needed to spend a lot of time along, thinking. In the bathroom. With tissues.

The prefect's badge on the other hand, as it were, caused Sirius to mercilessly prank him. Being transfigured to look like Draco Malfoy, aged thirteen, was humiliating. The temptation to say "Wait till my father hears about this" was strong, but Harry knew he'd get hexed.

Sirius taunted him by suggesting they might visit Malfoy Manor. The Dog, who Harry was tentatively calling Spot, pissed on Sirius's bed. Sirius was right, it was about feeling.

-==0==-

Harry got on the train and went to the Prefect's carriage.

The new Head boy, another Puff, David Corbys greeted him. The Head Girl was Frobisher's little sister Helena from Ravenclaw, and she had a clipboard covered in colour coded schedules and a gaze that left Harry thinking of Dementors.

Hermione turned up, in robes, with her badge on.

The appearance of Daphne Greengrass with a prefects badge surprised Harry.

'I mean her grades are good, maybe not potions, but then Snape is a useless git and mine are no better. Why am I surprised that Daphne, who never gets detention and good grades, and is calm, well mostly calm is a prefect. Come on, I'm a prefect, and I'm an ass. Sometimes.'

Daphne stood next to a nervous looking Draco Malfoy "Touch me and I'll break your arm in eighteen places" she hissed, her left hand clenched, claw-like.

Draco looked across the carriage to Harry. Harry, felt the imp of the perverse, and smiled at Draco., nodding at Daphne. Draco shuddered.

Harry looked around the compartment and noticed the room filling up.

…

Helena Frobisher got around to patrol schedules.

"Now we're having mixed gender, mixed house patrols. Because, frankly I don't trust two boys, or two girls, and I certainly don't trust two… for example Griffindors not to let Griffs away with things. So Girls, you'll need to be prepared to hex your patrol partner. The witches smirked.

Harry realised the opportunity, but tried not to show too much interest.

..

"Now sixth years. Greengrass, Potter?"

"Oh please, that idiot" said Daphne. Harry tried not to smirk.

Harry nodded.

...

"Come to me to pick out times after you get your timetables. First come, best times" said Helena.

...

Harry went back to the compartment with his trunk, and sat down. The thought of a whole year of not feeling sick.

"Harry" said Hermione crossly "You have to patrol the train, with Greengrass, weren't you listening?"

Harry got up and went back to the front car and collected an irritated Daphne. "Where did you run off to?" she said.

They patrolled down the train, checking compartments, mostly for upset firsties.

Harry knelt down and explained to the small blonde girl that no, they didn't have to fight a troll.

Daphne looked at him oddly as he shut the compartment door, they stood in the corridor of the gently swaying train.

"Why did you spend so long calming down one firstie?" she asked.

"Oh come on, she was tiny. Besides, fighting trolls is an elective in first year, everyone knows that" said Harry.

Daphne looked at him and burst out laughing. "You dork" she snorted.

Harry snorted. "Thanks" he said. "I'm looking forward to treacle tart now". Daphne looked suddenly distracted. "Oh, if you're lucky there'll be tiramisu" he said.

"Come on, we need to protect firsties from the legends you and Granger made"

"I'd like to point out, it was Ron that knocked out the troll."

Daphne stopped "You're joking."

"No, I'm Sirius" he said, and laughed.

Daphne coughed and stood up straighter "Are you really" she asked.

"Yeah, and he'd only learnt wingardium leviosa that day."

"Bull" said Daphne, shoulder checking him.

"No bull" said Harry, looking into the next compartment through the window and seeing third years, it looked like, all eating and playing snap.

Several cars down, they found seventh years drinking firewhiskey.

Harry opened the door and barged in, Daphne following.

"Congratulations, you've earned detentions, before the year begins." said Daphne.

"Pissoff Snake" said a large Griff, that Harry thought was James Peake.

"Peake. Language to prefects.. that's another detention" said Harry.

"Harry, my man, you're not Granger. We just want to have a few drinks."

"Sadly, if you'd carried it in in your trunk, I'd let it slide. But not on the train. The firsties are tiny, and you lot are big and drunk." said Harry.

"Harry, don't make us hurt you" said Peakes' buddy… who was Fitzy?

Daphne rolled her eyes. "Potter, stun them and I'll bag the contraband." she said.

"Letting a snake tell you what to do man?" said Peake.

Harry sighed, flicked his wrist and area-effect stunned all the sitting passengers.

He felt it in his magic… and sank almost to his knees, then Daphne grabbed his arm steadying him.

"I didn't mean all at once, you bloody showoff" said Daphne.

"Safest way" said Harry, wobbling and letting his intended hold him up.

"You're heavy" she said.

"You're tiny" retorted Harry.

"I'm only three inches shorter than you" protested Daphne. "You grew!"

Harry grabbed the luggage rack "Shut the door" he panted.

Daphne closed it and pulled down the blind.

"Oh, privacy?" asked Harry.

Daphne flicked her wand at the lock.

"Miss Greengrass, I find myself in a locked room with you, and five unconscious men" said Harry, between deep breaths.

Daphne snorted and transfigured a sweets bag into a carry bag and put the firewhiskey bottle in it.

"Shall we search their trunks?" she asked.

"They're getting detention already." said Harry, implying mercy.

"You're right" said Daphne, and with waves of her wand, opened the trunks, then cast Accio firewhiskey.

Three more bottles came to her, which she caught one of. Harry dropped his wand and caught the other two.

Daphne held out the carry bag and he put the two bottles in it. Harry bent over to pick up his wand.

Daphne put the fourth bottle in the bag with a clink.

"So dropping all of this with Filch?"

"I think the Slytherin women's benevolent fund needs a bottle or three" said Daphne.

"If you'd said I'd have packed some for you. Nobody's going to search my trunk" said Harry.

Daphne took out a notebook and wrote down the compartment, and then asked Harry for names

"James Peake, Fitzwilliams, Backley, and Mervyn" said Harry.

"Bravo. Four, the year above you. Are you worried about retaliation?"

"No, they just want to drink. I'll do a butterbeer run and get them a case."

"A butterbeer run?"

"I've got a way out of the castle to Hogsmeade, then I pop over to the Hogshead and buy a case."

"And you never told me?" asked Daphne

"You never asked." said Harry, oblivious as usual.

Daphne sighed, and wrapped her arms around Harry. "I feel ill." she said.

"Well, we know what to do" said Harry, who was feeling sick with tiredness, but kissed Daphne dutifully. Well, it wasn't bad. But just medicinal, just had to swap some spit because of the curse.

The way his hand held the back of her head, that was for balance on a moving train. Speaking of which, the motion of the train made them rub together. Medicinally… well mostly. Well okay.

They kissed, semi-medicinally till Daphne pulled back, out of breath and panting.

Her lips looked very pink.

He picked up the contraband and gestured to the door.

Daphne held up one hand, getting her breath back.

After a minute, they left the sleeping beauties, with trunks flicked shut by Daphne's wand.

"Remember Harry, tell me about money making opportunities" said Daphne brightly.

"Nice medicine today" said Harry, smirking.

"And if we kiss so readily, it's familiarity. We've had to do it so many times" she said. Harry nodded. If that's what she wanted to say, that was fine with him. She was the one grabbing his ass.

"Front carriage, to drop this off?" asked Harry.

"I need to abstract three bottles." said Daphne.

"Be careful in dorms with firewhiskey." said Harry quickly "Drunk witches can't hex".

"Oh I won't be the one drinking it." said Daphne. "I'm only selling it"

Harry shoulder-tapped her as the walked along "I feel much better about that"

"Hmh!" snorted Daphne, but patted Harry on the back anyway.

Harry wrapped an arm around her waist.

-==0==-

The opening feast announcements were… odd

Professor Snape finally got to teach Defence. Professor Slughorn was taking back Potions.. apparently he was Snape's predecessor.

-==0==-

**Griffindor Common room**

The Quidditch team was celebrating their first win of the year.

Music is playing and everyone was drinking and eating… there was some butterbeeer and maybe some firewhiskey in dark corners...

Harry was dancing with himself, 'getting his groove on' as Sirius called it.

Suddenly for some reason, his pocket was on fire.

He ran up to the Dorms and answered the mirror.

A scared looking Daphne in a toilet stall spoke to him "I'm in the second floor gents, seventh year boys after me. Come quick."

Harry pocketed the mirror, grabbed his Firebolt and went to the window, and jumped out. On the way to the ground, he got on the broom and soared up in a loop onto the second floor parapet. As he expected, the door was open and he didn't dismount. He kicked the broom over, sliding with a scrape of the footpegs, and got the broom moving, heading down the corridor at head height. Left to avoid a chandelier, right to avoid the next. He needed more speed, lowered and stopped dodging lights, pulling up, up not scrape to a smear against the fast-moving floor. The broom rattled and shook, and the hallway shot past. The group of searching seventh years suddenly in sight. He kicked the footpegs down, pushing the broom vertical, pulling his wand out of the holster. Bless Daphne. The first seventh year went down easily, the second tried to duck and went down painfully. Harry let go of the broom and ducked down and right as a bright yellow curse hit his Firebolt. It didn't explode or anything, and Harry snapped a stunner off that missed the third boy.

He got clipped by his enemies cutting curse, and responded with an overpowered banisher. The older boy hit the wall and fell, unconscious. Harry winced, his arm was bleeding. He put conjured ropes on the three assailants, and got under the cloak. A door opened down the hall, and a tall form came out "Selwyn?" it asked, wand drawn.

Harry didn't trust his aim, and got closer, then hit the boy with an overpowered stunner. All four bound, he looked around for the boys toilet. It was out of sight. Harry pulled the mirror out "Padfoot" he called.

Daphne appeared almost instantly, looking worried.

"I've got four, that all of them?"

"Yes" said a relieved Daphne. "How did you get there so quickly."

"Out the window, down, in the door from the battlements, slalom down the hall, stop."

"You flew that Firebolt, indoors!" said Daphne loudly. She seemed exercised about that.

"I needed to be quick" said Harry. "Can you get Snape?"

A door down the hall opened and Izzy darted off towards the dungeons, a blur of white.

Professor Snape was initially sarcastic… then as Daphne explained, he got colder and seemed to radiate menace. He examined Harry's four captives.

"You defeated four seventh years, Potter" said Professor Snape stiffly.

"I was lucky" said Harry. "They weren't expecting an attack, just to do the attacking."

"I understand Miss Greengrass is your Betrothed" said Snape, in a disgusted tone.

"A cursed marriage contract" said Harry.

"I will expect better from you in class from now on, Potter. Greengrass, you will be receiving extra tuition on Thursday and Tuesday nights" said Snape, flicking his wand and levitating the stunned bound students into a floating row.

"Are either of you injured" asked the Professor.

"Cut on my arm" said Harry, Daphne said "No, professor, just scared."

Snape waved his wand in a jab and hook at Harry's arm and the cut healed up.

"Well, Potter can comfort you, disgusting as that idea is" said Snape, and left with four bodies.

Harry leaned over and kissed her on the lips. Daphne moaned, then pulled back.

"Idiot" said Daphne.

"Sorry" said Harry. "Just trying to save you"

Daphne grabbed his head and pulled him back. They snogged in the hallway.

After a while, Susan Bones coughed "Oy you two, break it up' she said.

Harry looked up. Ron and Susan were standing watching Harry and Daphne, their prefect badges glinting.

"You can't snog in the hallway" said Ron.

"What do you think Greeny, should we get a room?" asked Harry.

Daphne let Harry go and frowned "Harry was comforting me. I was attacked by four seventh year boys."

"Well you look quite comfortable" said Susan, a trifle wistfully.

"We're betrothed" said Daphne. "Does nobody ever read the damn paper?"

-==0==-

Harry was running the next morning with Daphne, and turned into Spot the dog.

Daphne looked at the rough looking dog, with green eyes, whose tail was wagging.

"You look Happy" said Daphne.

"Arf!" said Spot, tilting his head.

"No, I'd get wet fur" said Daphne, shaking her head.

Spot ran, Daphne following.

Spot and Daphne ran around the lake and back to the castle.

When they got into the entry hall , Daphne slightly out of breath said "First one to the seventh floor?"

Spot barked and jumped on the spot.

Daphne looked to see if anyone was watching, and turned into Izzy. They lined up at the staircase and with a soft bark from Spot, they ran up the stairs. Izzy trounced Spot, whose paws slipped in the stone floor.

A slightly less puffed Daphne Greengrass reappeared "In your face, Potter!" she said.

Spot turned back into Harry. "The stone floor is almost impossible as a dog" he said.

"You lo-o-se" she said.

"Back down?" asked Harry.

"You'd better go have a shower. You stink" said Daphne.

"You smell… rather good" said Harry.

Daphne eyed Harry "Oh… can you smell better even not as the dog."

"Spot" said Harry.

"He's striped" said Daphne.

"Exactly" said Harry nodding. Daphne laughed.

"Well , I'm off back to my dorm room" said Daphne, transforming into Izzy and leaping down the banisters acrobatically, a blur of white.

"Showoff" said Harry, and walked to Gryffindor tower.

-==0==-

Harry met Izzy in a room on the third floor.

He bent down "Hey Izzy, I got you a present" said Harry, stroking her head and put a green collar on Izzy, with a tag that read 'Izzy if found Return to Harry Potter'.

Izzy hissed and transformed back into Daphne Greengrass.

She looked down at her neck "You put a collar on me" she said, reaching under her shirt collar and blanching. She ripped her tie away, and undid her shirt collar, to find a wide green collar around her neck.

"The tag says Izzy" said Harry.

"Hmm" said Daphne, and conjured a mirror.

"Return To Harry Potter!" she said Indignantly. "Get this off me" she insisted.

"It can hardly say return to Daphne Greengrass, can it?" said Harry.

Harry came closer and examined the collar. "This isn't the collar I put on Izzy. It has no seams."

"Fine!" exclaimed Daphne, and turned back into Izzy. Harry undid the collar, and got his hands cut by Izzy's claws before she turned back into Daphne.

"Never do that again. Izzy hates collars and I'm not some sexual deviant, that wants to get tied up in leather" said Daphne.

So have you finally got some Green sweatshirts with Property of Harry Potter on them or what?" asked Harry.

Daphne snorted. "I'm not property" she said crossly.

"Don't be silly, it's the shirts that belong to me" said Harry, smiling

Daphne snorted "Keep trying."

Harry nodded, then his hand shot out and grabbed Daphne around the ribs and he tickled her.

She giggled and squirmed. "Stop it..." she squealed.

"D'ya reckon that was enough" asked Harry.

"Maybe." she sighed.

"Well, see how you go." said Harry, waiting a second then tickling her again.

Daphne squealed "Stop!" Harry stopped tickling.

Harry held Daphne in more of a hug, looking over her shoulder. "Sorry about the collar" said Harry.

"They got expelled" said Daphne bluntly, changing the topic.

"Well, that's a relief" said Harry and hugged her tighter.

"Professor Snape refused to accept detentions, he kept pushing for expulsion" explained Daphne.

"Next time, turn into Izzy and run" said Harry.

"Izzy's small, even a weak stunner will knock her down. I'd never escape" said Daphne. Harry held her and rubbed her back.

"Well, you could get some other rings to prevent other people touching our hands." said Daphne.

"Cursed rings… use a curse to save a curse" said Harry.

The rings turned up from Sirius a week later with a note.

_'_

_Set of four Cursed rings as requested._

_If anyone but the other ring holder holds your hand, they get shocked._

_I'm not giving you the ones that are more dangerous._

_Your contract is second page news again. _

_You're now both famous as victims of a Black cursed contract._

_Sirius._

_'_

Harry looked over the great hall and caught Daphne's eye.

She got up and he followed a minute later.

"Well what?" she said, standing in the front hall.

"Cursed rings. Nobody can touch your hands without wearing the other one."

Harry went to hand Daphne the rings, to receive a gentle slap on his hand

"What'd you do that for" said Harry.

"You will be putting the rings on my fingers" said Daphne.

"Oh yeah" said Harry. 'rings in her fingers… a big deal' he thought.

"When are we going to dance again?" asked Daphne.

Harry took one of Daphne's tense, fisted hands, and took a ring.

She opened her hand out.

"You're the only woman for me" said Harry, honestly and slid the ring on her ring finger, next to her huge engagement rung.

"You'd better remember that!" she said, and he put the other ring on her other hand.

"I'm sorry Daphne, about the contract" said Harry, taking the other two rings and starting to put the on his had.

"Stop" said Daphne.

"What?"

"Hand them over" said Daphne.

Harry handed Daphne the rings and she grabbed Harry's open left hand.

"You're the only man for me" she said, and put the ring on his finger.

Harry started to realise what Daphne was trying to do, and he gave her his right hand.

She uncurled his fingers and put the ring on his right ring finger too.

"So, we're safer now" said Harry.

Daphne looked at him "You don't have any other rings?"

"Just these three, that you put on me" said Harry.

"Not a heirs ring or anything?" asked Daphne, curiously.

Harry shook his head.

"I wish we could dance right now" said Daphne.

"Now?" said Harry.

"Well I won't dance with anyone else will I" she said.

Harry held out his hands, and Daphne held them, the rings fizzed slightly on his fingers.

Harry and Daphne waltzed silently.

This would be easier with music" said Harry.

"So find a music box" said Daphne. "Mine is in the dorm"

Dobby found one very easily. They danced.

Some other students were staring. Harry saw and didn't care. That it was the only dancing he'd ever do in his entire life… that was a weird thought.

He looked up from his feet and saw a few other couples sharing their dance.

The music box wound down and Harry stopped. "Well, wind it up" said Daphne. Harry wound the music box and they danced again. There was now a small crowd of couples waltzing. It was … nice. When the music stopped half an hour later, the other couples applauded. Harry held Daphne's hand "Fancy nicking off to a broom-closet?" he asked. Daphne pursed her lips "That's embarrassing" she said, and left.

-==0==-

Harry tromped back down the stairs to the Gryffindor common room and saw Hermione and Ron standing looking at one another. 'Get on with it' he thought.

He had prefects patrol that night. He found Daphne as she left the Slytherin common room by using the map. He nodded to her from his position leaning against the wall next to the super secret exit of the Slytherin dorms.

She jumped "Asshole!" she said. "You startled me."

"Sorry" he said. They started in the dungeons, and slowly climbed floor by floor, checking the abandoned classrooms, the cupboards and the secret passages that were known snogging spots.

Harry was bored on the second floor and looked at the map to do a quick check "There's nobody there, we can go up to the third floor"

Daphne was angry "We could have just checked this map instead of walking around all night."

"I'm not sure the map shows all the secrets, it doesn't show the chamber of secrets, for example" said Harry.

"There are no students snogging in the chamber of secrets" she said sarcastically.

"My dad and his friends made the map, and they didn't get all of the castle. The might have missed a passage." said Harry.

"That we know about?" said Daphne dubiously

"Well it's been a couple of decades. One student finds it, soon we all know" surmised Harry.

"Hardly" drawled Daphne.

"Dobby!" called Harry.

Dobby appeared with a pop, a rag in his hand. "Harry Potter..."

"Dobby, look at this map and tell me, are there rooms or passages missing?" said Harry, handing Dobby the map. Dobby held it for a few seconds then bit the edge.

"Dobby, don't bite the map" cried Harry, pulling on the map.

"Sorry Master Harry Potter sir" said Dobby.

"Well?" asked Harry.

"The come and go room is missing." said Dobby.

"What's that" said Daphne, with a touch of amusement.

"It's a room that is where us house elves store… lost things, because it can be whatever we need." said Dobby.

"The room changes?" asked Daphne, sounding more interested.

"You walks in front of it's entrance three times, thinking about what you need, and the door appears, and the room has it. Mostly we need somewhere to put spare mops and buckets." said Dobby.

"It's a magical mop room" said Daphne, drily. Harry snorted.

"Oh no Miss Greeny, the room much more than that. The room of lost things be bigger than the great hall."

"Okay, we are going to see this room of lost things" said Daphne suddenly decisive. "Where is it?" she asked.

"Seventh floor, opposite the tapestry of the trolls dancing" said Dobby.

"Dancing?" said Daphne, in a tone that Harry was starting to recognise.

"We're going all the way to the top" said Daphne, pointing upwards. "Bet I beat you there" she said, and Izzy bolted.

Harry ran, outpaced by Izzy, but faster then Spot on stone stairs.

When the door appeared, Harry was very impressed, in addition to being breathless.

When the door opened to a cathedral like space full of lost and discarded broken and stained things, he wasn't so impressed.

"Harry, find a trunk in decent condition" said Daphne.

"Why?" asked Harry.

"We need to sort and sell this stuff. It's a goldmine" she said.

Harry dragged a potion stained trunk over to the door.

"Accio booze" said Daphne.

Harry spent the next thirty seconds casting cushioning charms.

"What do you want all this booze for anyway?" asked Harry "Are you an alcoholic?"

"I told you, I just sell it" said Daphne, putting the six sherry bottles into the trunk.

She continued packing firewhiskey and finally butterbeer.

"Can you find another trunk?"

"Why?" asked Harry.

"Because I'm going to Accio jewellery next."

"Daphne, did your father tell you how much I made from the Basilisk" asked Harry.

Daphne turned and said "He said you had savings." she said.

"Over a million galleons" said Harry bluntly.

Daphne dropped the bottle she was holding. "You're rich?"

"Filthy" said Harry.

"Huh" said Daphne. "Accio Jewellery."

An hour later Harry was impressed with Daphne's cunning.

She'd found a bucket full of, mostly junk jewellery and unpaired earrings, a small sack of coins; which she gave to Dobby, to give to Hogwarts "Always pay the house man," she said. "Though in this case they are house elves"

Then she started on potions. Not many good ones, but a good idea.

When she got him to summon wands… that was really sneaky. And there were a bucket full of them.

"We can take the wands to McGonagall to give to unfortunate students" said Harry.

Daphne blinked at him and just said "Untraceable wands. They're worth ten galleons each."

Accio gems had been interesting. Painful, but interesting, as they'd been pelted by shiny rocks... "Gringotts will cash these" she said, looking at the bulging, dirty sack happily.

"Shouldn't we be doing prefect things" said Harry.

"Check the map. If there's anyone obviously snogging, we go bust them." said Daphne.

It did only take a minute.

"Why are you so keen to make a galleon in here?" he asked "I am rich?"

"Well, you've only got the money from the Basilisk, plus whatever your parents left you. I'm trying to get us some more money, this is hardly difficult."

"They had a cottage" said Harry.

"I went there once for a history lesson" said Daphne. "The whole side's missing, the rain's got in. It'd need expensive repairs."

When Daphne told Harry to summon used parchment he baulked "That's junk"

"Humour me" she purred. Harry felt a disturbance in his pants.

The cloud of parchment was immense and the piles of junk all fell about.

"Now what?" asked Harry.

"We bundle it up and get sell it later." said Daphne.

"What?" asked Harry, not getting it at all.

"It's rubbish and it takes up space, so we can't see valuable things. Bundled up it's much smaller." explained Daphne. "It can be scraped and re-used."

"Surely we've summoned all the valuable things" said Harry.

"You can only summon what you know of" said Daphne.

"Yeah" said Harry.

"So, what's out there?"

"Old furniture, clothes, bottles… junk, I don't know" said Harry.

"Exactly. When we know, we can sell it, or use it. Why waste galleons buying furniture"

"So we're gonna be hoarders?"

"Are you a wizard?"

"Well, yes"

"Can you transfigure things"

"Well, yes"

"So even broken things are useful." said Daphne simply.

"What about the broken furniture."

"Can you cast Reparo?"

"Well, yes"

"Get cracking."

"This will take years!"

"We're here for two more years. But first, something fun" said Daphne 'Accio wig'

A wig flew through the air, but in the distance, they heard something metallic ringing on the floor.

"Did you hear that?" asked Harry.

"Yeah, jewellery" said Daphne, looking excited.

"And it couldn't be summoned." said Harry

"So it's magical… and therefore valuable" said Daphne.

It took an hour of searching to find it, a thin, corroded jewelled tiara.

Harry went to pick it up and felt a sudden unease. "There's something very odd about this" he said.

He could almost hear a chittering sound. "It's making a weird sound, and my scar hurts."

"Crikey" said Daphne, drawing back.

"Is it cursed?" asked Harry

"Hmm. I'll try a detection charm" said Daphne, as she cast something complicated and the tiara glowed a malevolent purple.

"That's cursed" she said. "Really dangerous" she explained. "Probably possess anyone that wore it, keep away from it."

Harry bent down and really looked at it. His scar hurt. He fell over backwards onto the heaps of junk and scrambled away from it.

"What is it Harry?" said Daphne, her wand poised to cast.

"It's really dark. I've felt something like this before.. It had Voldemort's memories in it. We need to stab it with a basilisk fang."

"Is it safe to touch" asked Daphne

"No. Really really un-safe" said Harry, shaking his head.

"Well, get a box." said Daphne practically. "I'll owl father"

"Or we could get Dobby to go get one"

"With my letter. Otherwise Father will think someones robbing him" said Daphne sensibly.

-==0==-

**The next night.**

Wearing a pair of dragonhide gloves covered in chunks of some kind of long-forgotten mortar, Harry stabbed the tiara. There was an ear-splitting shriek and a black cloud oozed out of the tiara and faded away.

"What the hell?" said Daphne.

"Well, that's distressingly familiar. I'll have to tell Professor Dumbledore" said Harry.

"I thought you didn't trust him" asked Daphne.

"And I don't" said Harry. "But he knows about this kind of stuff."

"I have an idea" said Daphne. "Give it to me, I think we can do better than Professor Dumbledore."

"Who?" asked Harry.

"The Department of Mysteries. They study this sort of thing." she explained.

Daphne apparently sent an owl, followed by Dobby with the diadem.

Sirius turned up the next day and quietly took Harry and Daphne away.

Once they got to Hogsmeade, Sirius tapped his nose and handed them off to some red-robed Aurors and they were taken to the Ministry, to a DMLE interrogation room, and left alone.

A while later, a grey robed person arrived. "Please stay seated" they buzzed, their face in shadow.

"Now your letter and what the elf had were very interesting" they buzzed.

Daphne nodded.

"We assume some relative of yours has been telling tales out of work" said the Person.

"I represent the Department of Mysteries. We are interested, and want to perform a couple of tests on Mister Potter."

Harry shrugged and Daphne nodded.

The person cast a spell and a black corona radiated from Harry's scar.

"Well, that's verified" they said. "You'll have to tell us where you put him, Mister Potter.

"Him?" asked Harry.

"Voldemort" buzzed the Person.

"I'm not exactly sure where it is… but there's a cistern, He's a pebble in the cistern." said Harry awkwardly.

"We know the rest from the letter" said the Person. "Come with me. We should be getting you back to school."

Daphne let out a breath "Aren't you going to help him?"

"We need to finish getting the rest of the things" said the person. "We should be ready for the procedure in a few days."

"What procedure?" asked Harry.

"We can cure the curse scar you have, Harry Potter" buzzed the person.

"Oh great. Will it stop the headaches?" asked Harry.

"We expect so" buzzed the unspeakable.

Daphne, Harry noticed, was a nervous wreck for the whole week, till they were taken away again. She cried on his shoulder as they danced on Friday night. He stroked her hair.

Harry found the fast elevator trip down to level eight exciting, but once he got into the Department of Mysteries, his scar hurt "My head hurts" he cried. They were met by two grey robed anonymous persons.

"Can't you do something for him?" cried Daphne.

One person in grey stunned Harry, and carried him away. Daphne raised her hand.

"Will he be alright?" asked Daphne. 'Not exactly what I meant' she thought.

"We have every confidence" said the other person, and took Daphne to a medical wing, where she sat and waited.

Harry woke up in a white room, naked.

He wished he had some clothes, and suddenly, there were some folded up.

His wish for treacle tart was unsatisfied. So, this was not probably not heaven, probably hell.

Harry dressed and looked around. There was lots of nothing.

In the distance, Harry heard the distinctive repellent sound of another Voldemort baby.

He strode off, to find a damaged Voldemort baby dying.

Harry gave it a good poke with his finger and it caught fire.

He laid his hands on it and soon it was just ash.

He fainted.

-==0==-

He woke up on a bed in a medical ward. Daphne sat asleep next to him on a chair, looking terribly tired and worried. He called out to her "Daphne."

She woke with a start "Oh you're awake" she said, and sighed with relief, her face lit up

"I remember having a headache, then I woke up in a strange white place, I think it was nightmare." said Harry.

"How does your head feel now?" she asked.

"Amazing. I feel light as a feather" said Harry, smiling "Good thing you summoned that wig for a lark, eh?"

"Yeah" said Daphne, and smiled at Harry.

She leaned over and kissed him very energetically, grabbing his hair. 'This is soo good' thought Harry.

She stopped kissing and spoke up, lips flushed "They said you can got back to Hogwarts this afternoon."

"And not miss Potions. How wonderful." said Harry.

"How did you get into potions?" asked Daphne, confused.

"I begged" said Harry honestly. "Professor Snape will accept E's instead of O's if I beg. … and I had to… promise to be polite."

"What, So I could be doing NEWT level potions." said Daphne crossly.

"Er , but you said you hated the class"

"That doesn't mean I don't want to know it!" said Daphne, and hit Harry with a stinging hex.

"Ow! I've been in a magical procedure, take it easy!" said Harry.

"When we get back to Hogwarts I'm going straight to Professor Snape to get into Potions."

"How about another medicinal Kiss?" asked Harry.

"Are you kidding!" said Daphne. "You'll be lucky to get one in two weeks time!"

Next Prefect patrol found Harry and Daphne in the room of lost things.

Daphne cried out "Accio size five women's boots."

"You're sorting boots with Accio?" said Harry as boots flew past into a lidless trunk.

"Why ever not?" asked Daphne, looking for another trunk to use. Eventually she transfigured an umbrella stand into a trunk. Harry was impressed at her transfiguration.

"What do we do with things we don't need?" asked Harry.

"Sell them, duh!" said Daphne, wondering if Harry had been dropped on his head.

"Where?" asked Harry.

"We can sell them retail, to the shop in Hogsmeade, or rent a shop somewhere over summer and sell them ourselves."

"Our own junk shop?"

"It's not a junkshop. We're turning opportunities into galleons."

"Knuts" said Harry.

"Don't knock knuts. Five and we've got today's paper delivered."

"So"

"So we sell some size five boots for two knuts, today, and a few more things like that and we've got spending money. For nothing" she explained.

"Do people even buy this stuff?"

"Why not, repair charms are easy, so is colour changing. People don't buy much stuff, but cheap stuff sells. We paid nothing, so who cares if we sell it cheaply and quickly." explained Daphne. Harry realised Daphne saw the world differently to him.

"What about the furniture?"

"If you can Reparo it… good. Otherwise, your friend the house-elf… you give him some tools, I'll bet he can fix anything."

"Where will he get wood?"

"The worst ruined things" said Daphne. "For starters."

"So we're selling furniture"

"No, we're investing in furniture. Otherwise we'd need to buy it later." said Daphne. "Good antiques cost ten or twenty galleons each."

"Each?" said Harry, looking at the mountains of furniture. 'Mountains of galleons.'

They worked late into the night.

"Where will we store all this stuff?" asked Harry.

"We need a place that's out of the way, like that house you-know-who was using" said Daphne instantly.

"Not here?"

"Someone could take it. We're working to sort and repair, they could get our labour for nothing." said Daphne.

It was going twelve when Daphne, rubbing her hands over the sorted piles of boots and clothes called it quits.

"The out of date clothes are junk" said Harry.

"Costumes" she said "There's a shop in Hogsmeade."

"Oh and Harry, You're taking me to Hogsmeade" said Daphne on the way out of the room.

Harry must have looked shocked.

"Everyone knows, and because it's a cursed contract, I'm getting less crap than I could have."

"Sure. This weekend?"

"And Tomorrow night" she said. "Bring galleons."

"What?" said Harry.

"We're having a 'date' in Hogsmeade, and you're paying" said Daphne.

"We're prefects" said Harry

"So what" said Daphne. "I've made five galleons off that firewhiskey so far."

"What about the trunk you just got."

"Oh I expect I'll make ten or fifteen off that."

"Some of it's old, and half-drunken" said Harry nervously.

"And that's why I sell that to boys" explained Daphne.

-==0==-

"What do you do all night" asked Ron, sitting on the side of his bed as Harry got changed for bed.

"Practice Reparo, mostly." said Harry honestly.

"Eh, why?"

"I've got to get my own house after school, and furnish it. Broken stuff is cheap. So Reparo" said Harry.

"You're as bad as Mum and Dad" said Ron. "Always fixing everything. 'Cept clothes, they do get a bit thin to spell back to good."

Harry suddenly saw the Weasleys clothes and trunks in a different light. Their house was quirky, true, but nice, and their furniture used, but whole. He suddenly had the urge to talk to Mr Weasley about his family budget. How much do jobs pay anyway. Where do you get food, if you're magical. Harry realised he had no idea. But Daphne... she was already making them money.

-==0==-

Harry led Daphne to the statue of the humpbacked witch "Dissendium" he said.

Daphne got Harry to buy three bottles of firewhiskey at the Hogs Head, then they went to the Three Broomsticks, where she sat at a table, and Harry got then butterbeers.

"Harry, you're a man of hidden talents" said Daphne, drinking butterbeer.

"Daphne, I, um… you really have good ideas about making money." said Harry, and dived into a butterbeer.

Some time later.

"Why do they call you the Ice Queen of Slytherin?" asked a tipsy Harry.

Daphne laughed, a real belly laugh. "Because I always sell my drinks with ice." she said.

"Why?" asked Harry.

"Takes up room in the glass AND they can't taste what rubbish it is." said Daphne. "Got the idea from Abe at the Hogs Head."

Harry giggled.

They took a lot of medicine in the tunnel before they re-emerged out of the witches hump. It tasted of butterbeer.

-==0==-

Over the next week, Dobby's trip to Gringotts to drop off jewels made Daphne three hundred and twenty galleons. Harry was pretty sure that was a lot for ten minutes work. The Jewellery made less, sold to a jeweller for material mostly, but still, another hundred galleons. The bucket of wands Daphne got her father to take to someone and they made four hundred galleons off it. By the end of the week, Daphne had made nearly a thousand galleons, and Harry was certain that the secondhand store, that was on the verge of being leased for next summer, would make a tidy profit.

Percy had eagerly given Harry a brochure about careers in the ministry. The secondhand business was making more in a week than a ministry job made in a year.

Instead of organising via mirror, Harry just spent all his free time in the come and go room, fixing and tidying. When Daphne announced that the Hogshead would pay a sickle a crate for bottles, Harry was forced to admit that even empty bottles were worth money. Then, after casting 'evanesco' for an entire Saturday, that half empty bottles of dubious liquid were worth money too.

By second term, the piles of junk, once so high and disordered, started to look different to Harry, like piles of marvellous galleons, just not exchanged yet. They were getting less disorderly too.

One evening, after "prefect patrols" Harry leaned over and kissed Daphne, for medicinal reasons. It was as natural as drinking pumpkin juice, but far tastier.

Daphne had taken to doing silly impressions using the vast piles of odd clothes, to make Harry laugh. Somehow, the impressions also included some kissing.

'Am I falling in love with her?' thought Harry. 'Is she falling in love with me?'

Clearly he'd thought too loudly because Daphne looked at Harry very intently "Harry, do you like me?" she asked.

"Um yeah" said Harry "I like you" he said.

"Do you like me or like me like me?" she asked.

"Um.. I think a bit of both" said Harry nervously. He got another peck on the lips for his troubles, and Daphne left as Izzy, who shot down the stairs.

-==0==-

Sixth year drew to a close, with thousands of galleons of profits, and Dobby and Winky ready to fill the rented store. Daphne had her father find one.

End of year exams were a bother. Hermione needed to be given a calming draft by Madam Pomfrey.

Harry got an invite to a wedding at the Weasleys after the end of term.

Harry hadn't been there much, but he knew the Weasleys, and Ron was a mate.

Ron's big bother, Bill who apparently was Indiana Jones (bless Sirius and the bankroll of pound notes) was getting married. To Fleur Delacour, who remembered Harry, and thought he should come.

Harry felt strangely excited... not that that was unusual, not with the amount of medicinal kissing in a prefect patrol these days. So he wrote a letter.

_'Daphne Greengrass,_

_Dear Daphne,_

_I have been invited to a wedding of some friends. As there will be dancing and I wish to stay alive, I would like to bring you as my date. It is in three weeks, and it is Bill Weasley marrying Fleur Delacour. The wedding will be at the Burrow, Ottery St Catchpole, Devon. Bill is a cursebreaker with Gringotts, as is Fleur._

_Do you agree to come along? We will dance, obviously, and take in a wedding._

_Harry Potter._

_'_

On the train home at end of year, Harry and Daphne had to patrol. Obviously the seventh years had locked their compartments, but the fifths were a bit rowdy. Harry and Daphne were kept busy all the way home. Harry had time to hold her hand for a few moments. Purely medicinally.

Harry was seized by an excited Sirius, and apparated home.

Daphne flooed over to Grimmauld place the next day. It was an interesting process; not their cursed wedding, but they had to turn up in outfits of equal dressyness; dress robes all round. And in colours that worked as a couple. In the end, it cost Harry two hundred galleons for their robes, and Daphne was very odd the whole time. She kept looking at him expectantly. He bought her ice-cream after the shopping and she looked somewhat mollified.

At the wedding, Harry danced with Daphne to the best of his limited ability, and for a while, he cheated, closed his eyes and swayed.

If he'd been a third party, he'd have seen Daphne had her eyes shut too. As it was, Ron and Hermione saw and thought they were being all lovey together.

After the party dragged to a close, Harry kissed Daphne goodnight… until Mrs Weasley yelled at him to stop. Daphne went home smiling. Harry felt… like he'd snogged his girlfriend. Mmmm.

-==0==-

**Just before the start of Seventh year.**

The secondhand store had netted five hundred galleons, and the rent had only been fifty.

"We're hiring someone to keep the shop running. We make more in a day than wages for a clerk, so by the end of the year, we'll have sold all the stock… including the store-house and have a tidy pile of galleons." said Daphne.

"We should sell the stock to another shop, quit the shop like we planned" said Harry.

"Coward" said Daphne.

Harry didn't know what to do. So he asked Sirius.

"I wouldn't know the first thing about making money. Just do what Daphne says" said Sirius.

"But I've already argued" said Harry.

"And you might be right, but you might not be. You have to trust her judgement, she's made you two a pretty pile of galleons so far" said Sirius.

"She sells confiscated booze in the Slytherin dorms" complained Harry.

"Huh, we did that in seventh year" said Sirius chuckling. "Your dad would confiscate it, and sneak it past your mum and I'd sell it in glasses. Always sell it in glasses."

"Huh?"

"So nobody gets too drunk. Nobody resells it, And you know who's drinking what, and because you make more money" said Sirius.

Harry took some good advice. Medicinal kissing was very nice.

He went out to Muggle London, and found a clothes store and bought Daphne a dress she'd never wear… far too scandalous. The look on her face would be worth it.

Sirius was sitting drinking when Harry came home.

"Harry, pinch twice as much booze as usual for your trunk when you pack." said Sirius.

"Why?"

"Because your betrothed sounds like she's might to shake you down for booze." said Sirius wistfully. "She's really very Slytherin"

"What make you think that?" said Harry.

"I think when she said to me 'I'm going to shake Harry down for booze on the train' said Sirius. "Maybe she needs to work on her sneakiness" continued Sirius,

Harry went to bed confused and dreamed of Daphne and snogging.

-==0==-

Seventh Year started, as traditional, with Draco Malfoy visiting Harry on the train.

Harry was not a prefect this year; He'd begged off for NEWTs… and to spend more time turning the room of lost things into the room of galleons as a nest-egg. The basilisk had been profitable, and he had a ludicrous amount of money, but the come-and-go room was making him enough money for a year every few months. 'I'll be able to leave my children money' he thought.

Besides, Ron and Hermione looked spiffy in their Prefect badges.

And as neither of them knew where Harry disappeared to, his evening Snog sessions… carefully metered out to at least every five days now, were going to be uninterrupted. Well except for fixing the growing mountain of furniture. Stacked neatly down in the old riddle manor, it started to look like a real furniture shop. And the snogging was getting very intense. He could hardly even look at Izzy without getting embarrassed anymore. God bless school robes.

"Potter!" yelled Malfoy, breaking Harry out of his revere.

Harry looked up from his textbook "Oh, Malfoy. Good to see you, How were the holidays?"

Draco shook with anger. "You can't ignore me. Just because you're betrothed to Daphne Greengrass, you're still a stupid halfblood."

"Actually Draco, as I did not choose to be Daphne's future husband, it's just how life is" said Harry, in a bored tone.

"Her family is in the sacred twenty-eight, they're too good for you, you should be kissing her feet!" said Draco.

"And... there we go again….I'm sure you're going to chose your bride.?" asked Harry, and wondering how Draco knew about Harry's sometimes bedtime thoughts about Daphne's feet.

Draco muttered and blushed.

"And I never get to" said Harry

"Greengrass is beautiful and pure-blooded, what's more to want!" said Draco.

"Thank you for complementing her." said Harry. "You can go now"

Silence from Draco and his goons.

"You'd be interested to know, Draco that the contract I'm under is much like the one that drove your dear Aunt Bellatrix insane. You know, she's in Azkaban, has been most of our lives. SO If you don't mind, I'm trying to enjoy my life… what little there is left of it before one or other of us is driven insane by the curses in the marriage contract and starts hexing all and sundry." said Harry.

Draco snorted "As If, you two go to Hogsmeade, you're a normal couple."

Harry flicked his wand out and with a twist, tipped Draco, Crabbe and Goyle upside down. Moody's lessons were… so useful.

"Malfoy, much as I find personally find Pansy distasteful, she at least likes you. Greengrass and I are cursed to be together, and been have to … do things to avoid the courting clauses cursing us. Ask your Mother about them, but be warned, you're only a hanger-on in the Blacks, so you can't inflict them on any of Your children.

"I'd never do that to a child of mine!" said Draco. "Its inhumane!"

"And calling a child Draco isn't?" retorted Harry.

His visitors sodded off.

Times like this, Harry really loved hexing Draco. Spinning a line about the contract, was just pure gravy. It stopped people like Draco giving Daphne shit, and he might get some extra medicine, if he was lucky. It was such nice medicine. She might even wear the dress. No, but she'd blush and that would be good enough.

Daphne went past later, and didn't stop. She was still perfecting. Dammit.

Harry went back to his book. Transfiguration was dead useful for fixing things, and charms for fixing things… and, well, turning evenings into galleons.

"Oy Potter!" said Daphne Greengrass later, standing over him.

"Harry looked up "Greengrass" he said. 'Wonder what scheme she's cooking up now.'

"Your trunk. Open it I'm searching it for contraband." she didn't seem to be kidding.

Harry looked at Daphne "Come on Daphne" he said.

Daphne flicked her wand and slammed the door. Another flick pulled the blind down.

"Open your trunk Potter, or I'll open it for you" she said.

Harry opened his trunk. In one corner, neatly packed were a case of butterbeer, and a bottle of firewhiskey.

"Contraband" said Daphne, and pulled it out, and put it in a carry-bag she conveniently had.

"You're honestly shaking me down for contraband" said Harry.

"And you'll get a punishment" she said.

"Punishment?" asked Harry curiously.

"I think what you need is a good spanking" said Daphne, smirking.

"Uh, can prefects even do that?" asked Harry nervously.

"Your betrothed can" said Daphne, sitting down. "Now lie over my lap, you naughty boy."

"Uh I'm not sure I'm into spanking" said Harry.

"And that's why it's punishment" said Daphne evenly.

Harry leaned over Daphne's legs, and suddenly she grabbed his buttock "Yes, Just as hard as they look" she said with a giggle.

"That's sexual Harassment!" said Harry, uncomfortably.

Daphne spanked his bottom. "No Harry, this is sexual Harassment!"

"Are you just getting back at me for arguing about the shop?" asked Harry.

"I'm getting free stock for my booze store. You, you get a spanking."

"But I don't like it"

"Well, don't contradict me then" said Daphne, giving Harry another spank.

"I won't do it again" said Harry.

Harry got up and sat, slightly gingerly.

"Now, I find myself in a locked compartment with a school bad-boy who gave up his prefect badge to have more time to do awful awful things" said Daphne, melodramatically.

"Would you like a laugh or a kiss?"

"Can't I have both? I'm sure you're so bad you'd ply me with strong drink, Me, an innocent, pure-blood prefect" she said, taking her shoes off and tucking her stocking clad feet up on the bench seat under her.

Harry's trousers suddenly got too tight. "Well, why don't you have a wee snort of Firewhiskey, Prefect Greengrass"

Daphne unscrewed the top and took a swig. "whooo" she blew flames. Harry got up and sat next to her "Well Prefect Greengrass, It appears you're in my lair, and drinking my firewhiskey, anything could happen.

When Daphne ran her hands through his hair while snogging him Harry let out a moan. It was so nice...

Fifteen minutes later Harry was dying of frustration. Daphne had snogged him silly, then got up and left. She'd tasted of firewhiskey and stringmints. But she'd sat astride his lap, and he knew now what she wore under her robes these days. How she didn't get cold…

-==0==-

A day later.

Harry was stacking some tables he'd repaired into neat piles in the room of requirement when the door opened and Daphne Greengrass, prefect came in.

"Map" she said, without any preamble.

"You could have dumped being a prefect and saved more time" said Harry.

"Seventh year prefect sounds pretty good on a CV." said Daphne.

"A job?"

"I could get a ministry job, keep my penniless husband" said Daphne.

"Who's rich and has a job restoring furniture, with the help of his friend Dobby" said Harry defensively.

"I might want a real job, something challenging." said Daphne.

"Well, do you?" said Harry, interested.

"I'm going to apply to the ministry, Department of Mysteries."

"They did seem pretty cool" said Harry nodding.

"They study mysterious magic" she said. "What's not to like."

"Is the pay okay?"

"More interesting than selling furniture" said Daphne.

"Well, you do that, if you want to" said Harry.

"You're not going to stop me, or fight, or complain?" asked Daphne.

"No, you want to, if you can get it, go for it." said Harry, turning back to a table.

"Why are you so damn reasonable about that?" asked Daphne.

"Why not" asked Harry, turning and looking at Daphne, curiously.

Daphne shook her head "You fight about keeping the shop open, but you don't care what I do for a job?"

"Oh, as long as you want to do it, feel free."

"Men" she said.

"You want the map?"

"Yes, now"

Harry handed his just-after the end of final-term wife the map.

She checked it quickly.

"Who's your patrol partner?"

"Weasley"

"Ron?"

"He shot off as soon as I said I as going to the library to get the map from you" said Daphne.

"Where'd he go ?"

Daphne scanned the map, folding out sections for a while. "Fighting with Granger"

"I thought they were dating?"

"Weasley has botched it" said Daphne.

"How do you know?"

"Izzy might have overheard her talking to Fay about it, Which reminds me, You need to make me laugh" said Daphne.

"I've got an idea for a nice thing we can do right now" said Harry.

Daphne blushed.

"Well, for example you wanted to dance right?" said Harry.

"And we danced, in the front hall of Hogwarts." said Daphne

"And at Bill and Fleur's wedding"

Daphne looked a bit pissed off. Given that was how Harry normally saw her, he continued.

"We're in a room that can literally be anything. We can have our own ballroom. We can really dance" said Harry.

"Really dance?"

"Much more room than that third floor classroom, fancy lights, big music" said Harry.

"Oh, that sounds fantastic" said Daphne. "Come on, get out of the room."

"Proper dancing with you is pretty good, and it's makes you happy" said Harry as he walked towards the exit.

"So that implies we'll have as normal a wedding as we can?" asked Daphne

"Yeah, with dresses and flowers and all that stuff." said Harry.

"Not just a signature in a Ministry office" asked Daphne.

"Not that" said Harry, shaking his head. "A proper wedding, but Sirius and Remus will come" said Harry, reaching the doorway.

"Is this all about you getting a snog?" asked Daphne, lips twitching.

Harry cracked up "Come on, we need to leave to reset the room so we can dance." he said.

The ballroom was immense, and had magical instruments.

They danced till they were both hot and tired, and then say on a convenient love-seat. Daphne kicked of her shoes and sat astride Harry's lap. Harry perked up.

Daphne spoke up "Harry, let's make love". Harry chuckled and grabbed Daphne very improperly.

"Oh…. Oh yes."

-==0==-

Preparing for NEWTs really was awful.

Hermione had been a bit teary, with the whole Ron thing, but seemed to have more time to spend on studying. Madam Pomfrey came to the dorms and started preemptively dosing Hermione with calming draft.

Izzy had taken to turning up for back rubs quite often.

Harry found he could stroke Izzy and read. And as long as he wore robes, his overexcited state didn't show.

Just before NEWTs, which had Harry taking up drinking himself, though he drew the line at one firewhiskey a day, Izzy started sleeping on his bed.

He had… odd dreams.

Just after the last NEWTs exam, he woke up to feel warm breath on his face.

"Izzy no" he said, and opened his eyes. A full-size blonde witch in a nightgown lay next to him in the bed. She waggled her eyebrows and cast a couple of charms on the bed-curtains.

"Daphne" he murmured.

She kissed him "I think we've earned this" she said and slipped into the bed next to him, draped an arm over him and said "Goodnight Harry."

Harry spent a very warm, turned on night.

He awoke with a warm soft weight against him, and a blonde blur. He put his glasses back on and cast a mouth-freshening charm, and kissed Daphne on the forehead. He could smell Daphne like a symphony around him.

Her eyes opened slowly "Hi" she said. "I like sleeping with you" she said.

"It's very distracting" said Harry. "Izzy's not so… arousing."

Daphne found her wand and cast a mouth-freshening charm.

"Well" she said and kissed him on the lips "I can't have you being all tense, exams are over" she said, and a hand slid down his body…

"Urk" said Harry.

"This won't take long" said Daphne. She was right.

"Now, if you would just pay me some attention" said Daphne, a hand under the bedclothes finding his hand and dragging it away. "And rub gently…. That's it."

Some time later Harry had tired hands and a happy witch. "Well done" she purred, and kissed him.

"Now… let's try that again, with less clothes" she said, and pulled off her nightgown, and undid his pyjamas.

"Well. Witch on top it is" said Harry, rocking his hips.

Some time later.

"Now I have to be off" she said, and pulled her nightgown back on, which evidently didn't conceal her perky boobs. Harry's brain, lubricated with sex, directed his hands. Daphne gasped "Uhhh" she said, but drew back.

Daphne crouched on Harry's bed and blew him a kiss "Later, Lover boy" she said and turned into Izzy, who turned and waved her butt-hole at Harry, then left the bed.

'She'll be the death of me' thought Harry happily. "Evanesco" he cast.

-==0==-

Harry's Seventeenth Birthday, Twelve Grimmauld place.

Harry sat next to his godfather, looking at the cake. A chocolate cake with a white cat made of icing on it.

"It's unusual" said Sirius, smirking.

"Chocolate is poisonous to dogs" said Harry.

"Good thing we're not real dogs" said Sirius.

"Why exactly is there a white cat on your cake" asked Remus.

"It's complicated" said Harry.

The party started an hour later.

Daphne Greengrass turned up to the party in a very grown up dress robe and high heels.

She kissed Harry when she arrived. "Happy Birthday Harry" she said.

In the corner, Hermione took a break from reading letters from places she'd applied for jobs at, to stare at Harry and Daphne and sigh.

Daphne turned and sat next to Hermione, cast a privacy charm and talked. Harry shuddered.

Neville slapped Harry on the back "Happy Birthday Harry" he said, Hannah Abbot hanging off him.

Hannah looked quite grown up as well, and a yellow-blonde. Harry opened his mouth.

"Thanks Neville, I'm really glad to have made it. We finished NEWTS, and nobody tried to kill me for two years" he said.

Neville snorted "You worry too much" he said. "Have you got an idea what you'll be doing?"

"Yeah, I'm going to fix furniture for the shop. It's relaxing" said Harry.

Neville eyed Harry "So not becoming an Auror or something?"

"Working with my hands, it's so… real" said Harry. Neville nodded "That's why I've always loved Herbology."

"And now Hannah too?"

"Yeah" said Neville. "Thanks for coming to my birthday yesterday."

"Neville, you've been my friend for seven years. I wasn't missing your birthday" said Harry.

Neville smiled. "Thanks Harry. Is everything okay with you and Daphne Greengrass. I know it's all that contract..."

"We have an understanding" said Harry.

In the corner, Daphne handed Hermione a small black book, which she opened and read the first page of. She looked up from the book and said something to Daphne who nodded and said something. Hermione went pale. Daphne pointed to the book and said something. Hermione went back to reading it.

Daphne came back over to Harry and said "That will give her something to do."

Harry nodded. "Did you tell her what you can become?"

"Certainly not" said Daphne.

Harry smiled and enjoyed his party.

…

As the party ended Daphne kissed Harry and said "Nearly time" and left.

That night, a white cat popped through the floo and went upstairs.

-==0==-

A slightly hungover Harry stumbled into the kitchen to have breakfast.

Sirius looked at Harry as he sat down "She didn't have to sneak off in the morning" he said.

Harry choked "I'm sure I don't know what you mean" he said.

"I'm a dog animagius and Mooney's a werewolf. We can both smell her… on you" said Sirius. Remus looked up from the newspaper "Morning Harry, you and Miss Greengrass had a nice night?"

"So you can't keep secrets in this house" said Sirius.

Harry retorted "Actually, I keep my secrets somewhere else."

"Oh, A hit, a palpable hit" said Sirius theatrically. "Seriously, You're married in four days, Cyrus and Salome wouldn't care."

Harry rolled his eyes and turned into Spot the dog, and raced off.

Spot returned, tongue lolling minutes later and turned back into Harry. "She'll be down after her bath" he said.

"Oh bravo" said Sirius. "You didn't kick her out first thing in the morning."

Harry rolled his eyes. "She's not a morning person these days."

Sirius snorted.

Harry smiled to himself.

Daphne Greengrass, in her very grown up robes and heels, arrived in the kitchen, blushing slightly

Remus and Sirius stood up. Harry followed them.

"Miss Greengrass, I trust you found the accommodations satisfactory" said Sirius.

"Please, Sirius, we're family in three days. Call me Daphne" said Daphne, sitting next to Harry.

Harry sat and kissed her cheek.

Kreacher was called, and served her kippers.

"Would you like a dish of cream with that" asked Sirius.

"No thanks, I had enough last night and this morning" said Daphne, and Sirius went red.

Remus laughed "And He's stunned! Excellent work Miss Greengrass. You used the smut charm on the Dodgy godfather and stunned him."

"Thank you Professor Lupin" said Daphne, with a smile.

"Oh Call me Moony. What should I call you?"

"Izzy" said Daphne "Though I don't answer to it, ever" she said, and turned into a white cat, then back again.

"Oh, you've got rather good at that" said Moony "Changing pose while you transform. Very difficult, well done."

Daphne ate kippers with gusto, Sirius sat, snorting.

"Daphne, I have to say, after meeting you for the first time at the Leaky Cauldron, when I got home I told Harry, that If you hadn't been trapped in a marriage contract, I'd have tried to get you betrothed anyway. You are, indeed, a pistol."

"A witch, Lord Black. I am a witch. I believe Harry is the pistol aficionado" said Daphne.

Sirius laughed.

Wedding day. August 3rd, 1997.

They were in a church near Daphne's home. All surrounded with muggle repelling wards for the day.

Harry walked up the aisle and waited for Daphne to arrive.

The officiating wizard was an old one, with wispy hair and glasses. He seemed cheerful. Harry and Daphne hadn't told him just how cursed their contract was. It wouldn't help.

Ron stood beside Harry, holding the rings. Over on the pews, in the front row left, Daphne's mother blew her nose. Astoria looked impressed with the pomp. On the right side, Sirius and Remus looked like serious adults. Daphne's friends and relatives on the left, Harry's on the right.

Harry hoped none of the actual adults would talk to Sirius, and that his godfather would stay sober.

A Bridal march of some kind played; Harry had no idea what it was, but Daphne had liked it; played.

Daphne came up the aisle in a fancy white wedding dress. She did look very pretty once she lifted her veil. Her father Cyrus stood to one side and looked important.

Harry and Daphne recited the vows from the parchment; the vows they couldn't eliminate.

"I Harry James Potter swear an oath of fidelity; to cleave only to Daphne Isobel, forsaking all others. I swear an oath of loyalty to Daphne Isobel, to hold her secrets close, to defend her from all threats. I swear an oath of domesticity to Daphne Isobel, to find my hearth and home only with Daphne Isobel. These things I swear till the end of my days."

"I Daphne Isobel Greengrass swear an oath of fidelity; to cleave only to Harry James Potter, forsaking all others. I swear an oath of loyalty to Harry James Potter, to hold his secrets close, to defend her from all threats. I swear an oath of domesticity to Harry James Potter, to find my hearth and home only with Harry James Potter. These things I swear till the end of days."

At the end of that Harry put an heirloom Potter family wedding ring onto Daphne's finger and she slid a gold band onto Harry's ring finger.

"I now pronounce them man and wife" said the officiator. Harry liked the sound of it, he'd heard the line in TV shows and movies and Daphne had shrugged.

Then they kissed publicly, just a quick peck.

They turned to the exit, and music played. Harry couldn't remember what it was called but it was music for leaving to.

He held Daphne's hand and walked slowly down the aisle out of the church.

They rode back to Daphne's house in a rented car, all the outside activities were arranged to be Statute Safe, so they could use muggle vehicles.

They got out and went into Daphne's parents ballroom. It was set up with round tables and chairs, all covered in white linen. They sat at the big centre table, Daphne smiled a lot at everyone.

Harry tried to remember as much as he could, of what was happening. Daphne did look like a beautiful bride.

They were eating the first course when Daphne stopped, patted her lips with a napkin and said "We're freer now than we were. No gala clause, no courting clauses. Just Fidelity Loyalty and Domesticity." she said.

Harry smiled at her "Well that's hardly difficult is it dear, not being at risk of sudden death on the dance floor, quite a weight off my mind." he said.

Daphne laughed.

"Now, Mrs Potter, we should dance. It is expected" said Harry, standing.

Harry and Daphne danced slowly in the middle of the dance floor, smiling a lot. Daphne's mum cried, Mrs Weasley cried and Remus cried. Remus had started crying as soon as he got to the reception. His date, an Auror with Pink hair wasn't sure what to do with a six foot two werewolf sobbing. Sirius was watching, pensively. Sirius tapped Remus on the shoulder and suggested he dance with his date. The pink-haired Auror started out a little clumsy, but seemed to gain coordination, and Remus started really throwing her high in the air. It was clear that mild mannered as he was, he was unnaturally strong. The Auror had to call the dance, red-faced, Remus showed no sign of tiring. They disappeared before the event was over.

After the speeches and dinner, Harry turned to Daphne and said "I have a present for you."

Daphne looked at him "Today is a pretty good effort, Harry" she said, a smile on her face.

"I got Dobby and another elf to fix my parents cottage" he said.

"Oh, I don't think it would be good to live there" said Daphne quickly, her face falling.

"Oh I wouldn't do that. I can still remember them dying there. I sold it to muggles. And they paid an absolute fortune for it. I made two hundred thousand galleons." said Harry, winking.

Daphne looked at Harry "You made what!" she said, looking surprised.

"So I think we can afford a nice house and still have lots of savings" said Harry.

Daphne blinked, gave a sob and threw her arms around Harry and hugged him "You amaze me. I thought we'd have to buy or even rent something terrible. And you did this."

"So you like it" Harry asked.

"I think you've outdone yourself." she said and kissed him, briefly.

It felt like every other kiss, but with so much affection behind it, It was the best kiss Harry had ever had.

Harry was pretty sure that he could cast a Patronus off the memory of that kiss.

-==0==-

**The next day, a Hotel somewhere (Harry doesn't care).**

Harry felt happy. He looked over, and there, next to him in the bed, was a sleeping angel. Well, not all the time, especially last night. Cor.

Daphne woke up, and smiled at Harry "Good morning, husband."

"Good morning wife" he said.

They had breakfast and got dressed.

Daphne spoke up "Harry, do you think we could live in the house you store furniture in?"

"Easily, it's huge" said Harry.

"Lets do that" said Daphne. "I think a lawyer can work out who owns it and make sure we end up owning it."

"It'll cost money" said Harry.

"You might be surprised" said Daphne, smiling.

"You know something?"

"In the letter from future me." said Daphne, then sighed "Look Harry, I need to tell you about the letter properly."

"Can I suck your toes while you do it" asked Harry.

"What?"

"I like your feet"

"Oh I know that, it was in the letter" said Daphne dismissively.

Harry's face burnt with shame "You knew about my… before we..."

"Kinks Harry, they're kinks" said Daphne. "I don't mind. I don't know what I like that's… odd, maybe I'm boring. I… I've snogged you, and we've made love. I'm still finding things out."

Harry looked mollified. Daphne gave Harry a thorough snog.

Daphne lay her head down on Harry's chest. "Harry, The Me that wrote the letter is not me. The history of the world is a little different than, there, what's the word?"

"But we were Married and Happy" said Harry.

"Eventually. We were trapped into a Marriage contract, but I didn't get a letter from myself in the future. We fought like cats and dogs." Daphne snorted "Cats and dogs" she said and giggled.

Harry smiled indulgently, and felt Daphne up. "Ohhh. I'm trying to have a monologue here!" she groaned. Harry stopped being so handsy.

Daphne spoke again "I was angry all the time, you were, well depressed. You cried a lot. We, um… didn't make love on our wedding night. I started to love you, you were nice, and good with the shop and well, then the contract ended because we hadn't had a child after five years. We divorced, I went back to live with my parents. You eventually married Ginny Weasley; she'd had a terrible Quidditch accident and couldn't play anymore. She only sort-of recovered, she ended up very bland. You had three children, two girls and a boy. You stayed with her till 2019, then divorced her and married Hermione. You two were married till you were nearly eighty."

"What happened" asked Harry, anxiously. 'This story of a future that didn't happen is weird' thought Harry.

"She died" said Daphne bluntly.

"Oh" Harry's eyes filled with tears, at the thought of his friend dying. Who'd been his second.. no third wife. Geeze this was hard to keep track of. One, sexy brilliant wife was much simpler.

"We met again for the first time in sixty years at her wake. We got talking, and a month later started dating" said Daphne, a little embarrassed.

"We were eighty before we dated?" asked Harry, eyeing Daphne's chest.

"We got married and lived together till you died." Daphne's eyes watered. "I didn't take it well. Your kids and grand kids tried to cheer me up, but I only wanted you back."

"Oh my god… Are you really old you from the future?" asked Harry, throat drying up.

"Eww, that would be gross" exclaimed Daphne. "I'm me. I read the letter future Daphne wrote, then burnt it."

"Oh, that's okay" said Harry. 'Whew, I did not have sex with a hundred and twenty year old woman'

"How did old, I mean, future Daphne get a time machine."

"She had been head of the Department of Mysteries for sixty years" said Daphne. "Then she retired to only do research for another ten or so."

Harry stared at his deceptively brainy and ambitious wife "And you want to go do that bit again" he asked.

"I've never done it, all I know is roughly what I just told you, oh and that you like having your scalp rubbed while you kiss, like my feet, and like it if I, um, stick my finger up your bum while we do it" said Daphne.

"I do not!" said Harry.

"You haven't tried yet" said Daphne. "And for reference, I don't think I like it."

Harry stared "And so the letter had a little bit of history and some sex tips"

Daphne giggled "I might have made that bit about the finger up" she said, and burst out laughing.

Harry frowned "This is a serious business" he said, then tickled Daphne mercilessly for a short time. He let her go when she started to really squeal.

Daphne straightened her shirt and continued very seriously "Now what future Daphne did probably destroyed the universe as it was… now our history happened instead. We can't ever tell anyone. Not even Granger."

"Why'd future Daphne do it?" asked Harry.

"She only had um, sixty-four years happy with you. Missed out on sixty-three before that. She thought twice as much Harry time was worth destroying all history. Oh, and you're taking heart potions after your hundredth birthday. I think we can push back your death another couple of decades."

Harry felt loved, loved by someone who, it occurred to him, would… destroy the whole universe to be with him for longer. Someone was cutting onions nearby. Clearly, a lot of onions. Piles and piles of onions.

Daphne distracted him with a hug at this point, then… well Harry was glad Daphne liked him That much. Harry tried enthusiastically to show Daphne just how much he appreciated… and after the fifth attempt, Daphne, lying flushed on the bed said "I think I've had enough for now" she said. "Lie next to me."

-==0==-

Harry apparated home from the shop to the rented house in Hogsmeade, they'd sold a third of the furniture he'd repaired and it was less a junk store and more an antique furniture store now. The shoes and robes still sold, knuts piling up.

Dobby and his friend Winky had come to an arrangement of some sort, and they took the piles of furniture and other saleable goods from Hogwarts and stored it in the large house Voldemort had used. They hadn't technically paid to use the house, but whoever owned it, didn't ever visit it.

Harry had cleared out the main rooms of the old Riddle house and a bedroom. All the spare rooms were for storage. All fifteen of them.

Daphne had done quite well in NEWTs getting 4 EE's and the rest A's, and got an entry-level job in the ministry. Supposedly in the DMLE, but Harry knew she was an Unspeakable, in the Department of Mysteries.

Everyone seemed surprised that the boy-who-lived, and came first equal in the Tri-Wizard cup was running a furniture shop, with four EE NEWTs, but free publicity was free marketing.

Harry went into the kitchen and checked on the casserole he'd set going in the morning. It was ready to eat, and it would not matter if Daphne came home now, or in an hour.

Harry sat down with the duplicate accounts books Daphne had given him and tried to do the accounts for the business for the day. It was difficult… not the maths, the accounting part.

He toiled away, and thought about eating. He didn't actually wait for Daphne to come home before eating, it was just a sort of almost joint meal. They were busy people. Daphne sometimes worked late into the night.

The door opened and Daphne came in.

"Evening Dear, how was work" said Harry, setting the ledgers on the sideboard and getting out some bowls.

Daphne snorted "Fine. How was the shop?" she asked, hanging up her travelling cloak and washing her hands in the kitchen sink.

"Thirty seven galleons" said Harry.

"Today?" said Daphne, her hands still under the running water.

"Two tables" said Harry proudly.

"You're making my ministry salary look bad" said Daphne, turning off the taps and drying her hands on the tea-towel that hung in front of the wood stove.

"Only today." laughed Harry, spooning casserole into bowls.

"Whats' dinner?" said Daphne, sitting down.

"Griffin casserole" said Harry, putting the plates on the table.

Daphne sighed "Chicken I assume?" she said.

"Yeah" he said, waving his wand at the breadbox and levitating some buns over to sit on the centre plate.

They ate quietly, saying what came to mind.

After dinner, cleaned up with some pretty fancy wand-work by Daphne, Harry turned on the Wizarding wireless Arthur Weasley had given them as a wedding present, and tuned in the dance music channel.

They stood in the small-ish sitting room and danced slowly to the music, their eyes closed.

After half an hour of dancing, Harry went to his room and went to bed, and Daphne joined him a few minutes later "And don't get handsy, I've got to get in early tomorrow" she said, and snuggled up to him and sent to sleep.

He slept like a log.

-==0==-

**A month later**

Harry apparated back from the shop to the store-rooms of the Riddle house and looked at the dwindling pile of furniture.

Business was good, but the inventory was emptying out.

'There's still lots at Hogwarts' he thought.

Being end of term in a month, he had an idea.

That night after dinner, he pulled out the marauders map and placed it on the dinner table.

"Hey Daphne, come see this… It's interesting."

Harry poked the locked map with standard revealing spells and the marauders insults began to show.

Daphne came around the table and looked and poked the map a bit with her wand.

She snorted at some of the insults.

"So how does it work?" asked Harry, "I solemnly swear I'm up to no good."

"Why are you using the map now?" asked Daphne, sitting down next to Harry, her elbows on the table.

"Restocking. I'll eventually run out of junk from Hogwarts" said Harry.

"We can take some profits, use it to buy an estate sale" explained Daphne.

"A what?"

"A house gets sold with all its junk. Houses get sold surprisingly cheaply, full of stock we could fix and sell" said Daphne.

"How did you find out about this?" asked Harry.

"The ministry internal newsletter lists the sales."

"The dirty dogs" said Harry, indignantly.

"You have your agent on the inside" said Daphne, winking.

"In the DMLE" said Harry, and laughed.

Daphne frowned at him "It's a secret." she said stiffly.

"So how does the map do the insults" asked Harry.

"It looks" Daphne cast a few strange spells "They come from some fixed lists"

"So nothing really clever" said Harry.

"The map's function is very clever. It's tied into the magic of the whole castle. Really it's very well done."

Daphne sat for awhile "You should tell me some secrets" she said.

"Oh yes, Mrs Potter, I would like to tell you about my sorting"

"Sorting"

"The hat wanted to put me in Slytherin" admitted Harry.

"You?'

"Said I'd be great if I went there" said Harry.

"I could have had another four years of you" said Daphne.

"Hey, just… don't use a time machine and change it again" asked Harry.

Daphne pouted at him "You destroy the universe One Time for love" she said.

Harry laughed until he was breathless.

"Who else knows?" asked Daphne, more seriously.

"Nobody" said Harry.

"Why?"

"Draco Malfoy made a bad impression on me, and Ron and Hagrid badmouthed Slytherin" admitted Harry.

"Well, at least we can ignore Draco Malfoy now" said Daphne. "Little daddy's boy" she muttered.

Harry hugged Daphne and rubbed her back for a while.

"Who made the map" asked Daphne.

"Sirius, Remus and my Father made the map while they were at school" said Harry.

"I'm impressed" said Daphne.

"I'm mostly annoyed. Sirius's party trick with the will made me jealous." said Harry.

Daphne laughed. "The boy who lived, jealous."

"Daphne, I have another secret" said Harry.

"Oh, are you gay?" said Daphne.

"I, um, fancied you in first year." said Harry.

Daphne flicked her hair "My beauty draws all like moths to a flame" she said. "Still, tempting to destroy history again. You could have been my little boyfriend."

"Daph!" cried Harry. Daphne laughed, a belly laugh "Gotcha" she said.

Harry called the night at this point. Mrs Potter sang when she was on her own the next day at work.

-==0==-

Harry went back to work, trying to find a warehouse, trickling stock out the Come and Go room to the store-house with Dobby and Winky.

-==0==-

Several days later, Daphne was excited and after dinner, showed him some parchment.

Harry had been expecting something about magic, but it was a section from the internal newsletter, listing a large house for sale, as an estate lot. On paper it looked like a solution to both furniture storage, and supply issues. But Harry found something about the description familiar.

"Daphne, read me the description" he asked, and closed his eyes.

As Daphne read the description, three stories, large grounds, he realised where he'd seen it.

"I know that building" said Harry.

"You do?"

"We store inventory there." said Harry, and snorted.

"Well we can buy it" said Daphne.

"So we should" said Harry. "We've been storing stuff there for years."

-==0==-

Harry went back to work. Furniture is good that way. It just is. A table leg is loose… you fix it.

The next morning Harry woke up and kissed his wife's head. She woke up yawning "What?" she said.

"So fancy going to look at the old Riddle House?" he asked.

Mr and Mrs Potter apparated to the private back gravel yard at Little Hangleton, because that's where Harry knew the location best, and pointed at the house.

"This has muggle repelling charms all over it" said Daphne.

Harry grinned "I'm not totally incompetent" he said.

They looked at the outside of the house, it was almost falling apart.

The inside was much better, thought crowded with stock.

"Rather than sell it off, it could all be restored" said Harry.

"You want to live in a sixteen room manor?" asked Daphne.

"Your parents have nine" Harry pointed out.

Daphne laughed.

Harry led Daphne on an exploration, and coincidentally found the master bedroom on the third floor, coincidentally clean, with fresh sheets and champagne and roses.

"Oh Mister Potter, you ruffian, you've led me to your lair, and now you're going to try to take advantage of me?"

Harry smiled "It's worth a try"

"Today is your lucky day" said Daphne.

That night they danced, their eyes closed to the music on the Wizarding wireless, and then went to bed, again.

Harry passed out or fell asleep, he couldn't remember in the morning.

His wife sings when she's happy, he discovered. She has a beautiful voice.

-==0==-

The next day, Harry contacted the ministry via floo about the Riddle house.

Delphini had been sent to Azkaban for using unforgivables, and the official said, the liquidation of the estate had encountered a snag, as the goblins had found a distant relative who was alive.

Harry thanked the official for their time and stood up.

He went back to furniture.

About lunch time, an owl dropped a letter on Harry.

_'Harry Potter,_

_The old curiosity shop_

_Diagon Alley._

_Harry Potter,_

_You are requested to attend a intestate properties meeting_

_two pm today._

_Estate services, Grabbit, Statchit and Runne,_

_Lawyers._

_Diagon Alley._

_'_

Harry turned the sign over to closed, Sue would be back later to run the till.

He went to the back room, ate lunch (cold casserole), tidied himself up and went to see the lawyers.

-==0==-

"Mister Potter, so glad to see you here. This meeting is to inform you that your distant cousin, Tom Marvolo Riddle has died, and left no will. As his mothers family has been, er, gone for some time, you are the nearest living relative."

He had a bastard daughter" said Harry, seeing more paperwork in his future.

"She's not able to inherit, due to her legal status as unforgivable user." said the Lawyer.

"So once the appropriate forms are signed, you will inherit Tom's estate"

"And what is that?"

"A house, some land, not magical, he inherited it from his muggle father" explained the Lawyer.

"Oh really, well, were do I sign?" asked Harry.

"Here is the form" said the lawyer.

"I just need to take this past my wife. She's got the real business sense" said Harry.

"No hurry Mister Potter, we will be taking some modest fees, on an hourly basis, of course"

Harry smiled "See you later" he said and walked briskly out of the room holding the form.

-==0==-

That night, Daphne arrived, looking tired but happy to eat dinner.

"I was given this from the executor of Tom Riddle's estate" said Harry, sliding it over.

"Apparently I'm the nearest relative not in prison for life." he explained.

"And you didn't sign it?" asked Daphne, after eating some casserole.

"I wanted you to look it over" said Harry.

Daphne's lips twitched "You can learn?" she asked, jokingly.

"Take it to work if you want, they're going to bill hourly on hours expended" said Harry.

"Grass snakes" said Daphne.

"But cheaper than the ministry, who now can't sell it, because I probably own it" said Harry.

"You checked that today?" asked Daphne.

"Seemed prudent" said Harry.

Daphne's lips twitched again "You really can learn!" she said.

Harry turned on the radio to the music show.

"Harry turn off the radio, I want to talk"

Harry did as he was bid.

"Harry, do you want to move there?"

Harry shrugged "There's a beautiful irony to using Tom's family home."

"Isn't there" said Daphne.

"The fact that I got you in bed there, that's a coincidence." said Harry.

"Not connected to it being sixteen bedrooms and being full of heirloom furniture" said Daphne, blushing.

"Thank god I'm an antiques dealer" said Harry. 'She likes old houses...in a kinky way.'

Harry pointed to the Radio "Dance?"

"Not tonight" said Daphne.

Harry sighed and sat waiting.

"Harry?" asked Daphne

"Yes?" said Harry.

"Come to bed, husband!" said Daphne.

He went to bed and slept very little.

-==0==-

He woke early and started breakfast.

Daphne came in to the kitchen, her hair damp from the shower.

Harry sat to eat breakfast and stared at his wife. His beautiful, young wife.

"Harry, why are you staring at me" asked Daphne.

"I um, want… nothing" said Harry.

Daphne got up to get toast, leaned over and kissed the top of Harry's head.

"If you want another naughty before work, ask me before my shower" she said, with a wink.

Harry ate some toast, drank some tea and got his bag.

Daphne got up and followed him

"What are you doing"

"Today's Saturday, I'll come and work on the books" said Daphne.

They apparated to the shop, unlocked and Daphne sat in the back room, working on the accounts while Harry mended a desk.

Daphne got up "Harry, I just need to check something"

Harry shrugged, and Daphne grabbed his buttocks. "Yup, still as hard as they look" she said.

Harry turned around "Daphne!"

"Look Harry, we're married, I was just wondering, are they really still that hard and… well they are" she said.

"And what's stopping me from grabbing you? You look like, well a very beautiful woman" said Harry. "And there's all this antique furniture, and someone might come in at any time"

"Is the front door of the shop even open?" asked Daphne, pupils widening.

"It could be" said Harry.

Daphne laughed "You really want to take me on this table, with the wood-shavings and beeswax." said Daphne, trailing off.

"I'll get the door" said Harry.

"Harry, just… do me, please" said Daphne. Harry tried his best.

Daphne's last words to him that night were "Oh Harry, you can't tell anyone we do it in the shop It's so embarrassing."... or maybe it was "Too Sleepy" he couldn't remember.

-==0==-

A year Later

The Riddle house finally cleared probate and Harry took possession.

Within the week the place was tidy, only the spare rooms jammed with stock.

Harry finished cleaning up the kitchen and went to the bedroom.

Once he lay down on the bed, he exhaled, 'success'.

Daphne arrived an hour later "Harry?"

"Upstairs" he yelled.

Daphne climbed the stairs loudly, and ran into the bedroom "I love what you've done with the place" she said, undoing her jacket.

"All I've done is lie down" said Harry.

"And such a good idea it was" said Daphne, jumping onto the bed.

-==0==-

The first Friday after moving to the Riddle house came and Harry and Daphne sat in their kitchen, looking at each other. "You didn't make dinner?" asked Daphne.

"What are we going to eat?" she asked.

"Pub grub down in the village" said Harry. "A party!"

"We'll have to go muggle" said Daphne. Harry rolled his eyes. "Come on, your jersey and jeans." he said.

Daphne took a very long time to get ready.

-==0==-

Harry and Daphne, in jerseys and jeans went to the Strangled Lark down in Little Hangleton.

Harry noticed that his wife had an amazing bust. Was that bigger than he remembered? He'd have to check carefully tonight, again. She smelt… delicious.

The opened the door and went in.

The pub was very old, dimly lit and quiet, with a few locals at tables and a group playing darts.

Harry went over to the bartender, a large orange haired an with big whiskers.

"Hello, Harry Potter" said Harry.

"Ted Ainsworth" said the Bartender

"That's my wife Daphne, we bought the old Riddle place" said Harry.

"Oh, been there long?" asked Ted.

"A few days" said Harry, and Daphne smiled perfunctorily.

"Oh I forgot to cook and we need two dinners, whats good?" asked Harry.

"Shepherds pie" said Ted thoughtfully.

"Well two, and a couple of ciders" said Harry, pulling a wallet out.

"What d'you do" asked Ted.

"I fix old furniture, Daphne works for the government" said Harry.

"Oh ah?"

Harry nodded.

"You're not from round here then?" asked Ted.

"I'm from Surrey" said Harry. Ted nodded

"Daphne's from Hampshire" said Harry.

Daphne folded her arms "Harry doesn't get out of the workshop much, so he'll talk the legs off a table" she said, a slight smile on her face

Harry took a glass of cider and handed it to Daphne. She took a sip. "Not terrible"she remarked

"Well Thank you Mrs Potter, from the big house" said Ted, pulling his forelock.

Daphne's eyes narrowed. Harry stepped back from the bar and put an arm around her. He gazed at her 'please don't hex everyone' he thought, closely followed by 'Damn she's gorgeous.'.

Ted snorted. "Sorry Mrs P. Just joking" he said.

"Get your drink" said Daphne with a snort.

Harry walked back to the bar as Daphne headed tablewards.

"You you two've been married few years then"

"Does it show?" said Harry ,taking a pull on his cider

"She's not too happy being here, but you hug her to calm her down." said Ted softly. "You're like an old married couple."

"I've known Daphne for… must be over four years" said Harry.

"Well, I'll being your dinner when it's dished, Mister Potter from the big house. Harry flinched.

Ted's eyes narrowed "So you're from Surrey but when people treat you toff and you don't like it. And your wife's a classy one with a big temper. I reckon you're slumming it fixing furniture Mr Potter"

"Antiques." said Harry. "Since before I left school"

"Antique dealer? Well, that explains how you got the big house" said Ted.

"I do alright" said Harry.

"And the little woman more than does her share" said Ted softly.

"Are you a mind reader, Ted?" asked Harry.

"No, just a bartender." said Ted, and started polishing a glass.

Harry took his pint over to the small table where Daphne sat looking at Ted with a hint of a glare.

"He made fun of me" she said petulantly.

"He made fun of me too." said Harry. "They've not had anyone at our house in fifty plus years. He's feeling us out"

"Well, on a brighter note, there is a juke box here, and we can have our after dinner dance." said Daphne.

"Is there waltz music?" asked Harry.

"You can… get your groove on I believe you said" said Daphne.

"And you can survive that" asked Harry.

"I've been married to you for a year. I'll cope" said Daphne, with a wink.

After dinner, they compromised with a slow song.

As usual, they danced, slowly, eyes closed.

Ted and most of the locals watched with interest,well the ones that weren't playing darts.

Harry and Daphne left after the song ended. They had somewhere to be. Bed.

-==0==-

A minute after the door shut Ted said loudly "Harry Potter, Mends Antiques and Sells them, Daphne Potter, works for the government. Ten to one He's old money, no bet she's old money."

"Why's he old money?" asked Janice a woman of indeterminate figure, who did something with administration in the council down in the big town.

"Mrs Potters got a ring you could moor a ship to on her finger." said Ted simply.

"That Mrs Potter's a fine figure of a woman" said old Jeffry.

Old Evan, who had a beard a sparrow could choke on snorted "See them dancing, them lovebirds do that every night"

"Howd' you know that?"

"I can lipread" said Old Evan. "cos I'm mostly deaf you daft arse" said Old Evan.

"Think we'll see them at the fete?" asked young Bill, a very blond, wet, Anglican young man, who was pants at darts.

"She's a bit high powered government job for that" said Ted.

"A real looker but the temper on her." said Basil, who moved things from place to place.

"Mr P just jumps to hug her." said Ted.

"Holding her back more like it" said Old Evan. "She was going to put you in your place."

-==0==-

Harry and Daphne walked back home and went to their bed

Daphne's appearance was explained, after careful investigation to be a push-up-bra. Harry tried his very best to cheer his wife up. She decided, after the fourth time that he was sincere. After the sixth time she said "Okay, you proved your point, get on up."

-==0==-

Harry was woken very early by Daphne turning on the light. "Oh My Head!" groaned Daphne at what Harry quickly discovered was 4 am.

"For gods sake woman, why'd you wake me!" cried Harry, holding his head, which hurt.

"I need hangover cure" she said, from under a bundle of blankets next to Harry.

"So do I" said Harry.

"Well there's none in the cabinet" groaned Daphne, one arm outside the blankets, holding out an empty potion bottle she'd accio'd.

"So I have to go make some" said Harry.

"You're the one with a NEWT in potions" said Daphne, pushing at Harry with her feet.

"I got an A" said Harry, and got out of bed.

"And put on a work robe, you'll ruin your pyjamas" said Daphne. "And if you get this potion done, you'll get an O" she muttered.

Harry thought about the headache going away.

Harry lit his wand and opened the locked door to the basement and went down the stairs. Daphne following him with her wand lit.

They went to the locked room with the potions lab in it, and stepped through the second set of muggle-repelling charms.

Harry got the potions textbook down off the shelf and found the right page.

"You haven't memorised the recipe" asked Daphne, rubbing her head against Harry.

"I'm having difficulty thinking, dear" said Harry.

The potion came out looking a pleasant whitish-blue.

Harry decanted two vials and bottled the rest in the bottle Daphne had brought from the bathroom.

"Bottoms up" said Harry.

Daphne and Harry drank the potion. Within moments, Harry's headache disappeared.

Daphne sighed.

Harry handed Daphne the bottle "Here you go" he said.

Daphne smiled briefly.

Harry evanesco'd the cauldron and tidied the workbench.

Daphne stood there, wand raised, making light.

"Thank you" said Harry.

"We should get a lamp" said Daphne, licking he lips.

"I think the Aurors took it" said Harry. "Or someone since"

Harry lit his wand and they left the basement, locked up behind themselves and traipsed up the stairs to the third floor where the good bedrooms were. Harry looked upwards and watched the frankly gorgeous ass of his wife in a nightgown swaying as she climbed the stairs. He got hard. It's not perving when it's your own wife, he rationalised.

He held his wand as far from his body as he could, trying to keep his pyjamas in shade.

"Thank you for the potion Harry" said Daphne "Lets get some sleep."

Harry watched Daphne lie down in the bed. He went to get into bed and Daphne said "What the hell Potter!"

"You have a very beautiful arse" said Harry.

"If your hangover cure potion wasn't so good, I'd tell you to fuck off. But as I feel fine…" Daphne leaned onto Harry's lap. "Lie still…" she said and Harry's toes curled. Damn.

-==0==-

Later that morning, Harry got up and dressed, and went downstairs.

Daphne appeared after breakfast was on the table, long hair still a bit wet. She was wearing a grey skirt and a black and white striped shirt. It was very Daphne.

"Next time we go to the Strangled Lark we're not having the cider" said Harry, to have something to say.

Daphne nodded "Too lethal" she said.

"Here's your toast" said Harry, handing Daphne a toast rack with warm toast.

He poured a mug of earl grey tea, two sugars, added milk "And your tea."

Daphne bit into marmalade toast, drank some tea "Running late" she said.

"Well yeah" said Harry.

Harry ate breakfast, Daphne getting up to put her plate and mug in the sink.

She stopped near Harry "Did you not wash this morning?" she said, sniffing.

"Er, running late" said Harry.

"Honestly you smell of sex and beeswax and..." Daphne stopped, grabbed her bag and walked very briskly of the room.

There was a crack as Daphne apparated to work.

'Fuck, now I need a fuck again!' thought Harry. 'Bloody sexy wife.'

Harry wondered about the villagers. 'Fuck it I'm going to need to get a car' he thought. 'Can't confound them forever', they'll wonder how Daphne gets to work.'

-==0==-

Harry went up to the first floor after cleaning up the breakfast dishes. The rooms on this floor held spare stock, and Harry went to the end room and mended the drawer slide on a cabinet. Sue would open up and work the till, and knew to floo over is there was something urgent.

Harry started a casserole, and looked around for meat. Seeing nothing, he went outside, checked for muggles and cast as strong an 'Accio rabbit' as he could. Rabbit casserole tonight for a change.

The day passed, the clock in the hallway ringing, reminding Harry to have some lunch.

After some bread and tea; the casserole looked and smelt like it might be good tonight, the lemon was working with the rabbit.

He went to the bathroom, splashed cold water on his face, stared at his red rimmed eyes in the mirror, took a deep breath and left for the shop.

Sue, an older witch with a complicated messy past, but who worked for what they paid ran the daily selling part of the shop, greeted him from the counter. "Afternoon Harry" she said.

"Hows the shop" Harry asked.

"Someone asked for parchment, of all things" said Sue, shaking her head.

"We have bales of it. I'll get Dobby and Winky to bring a few" said Harry.

"Oh and we're nearly out of boots" reminded Sue.

"We won't have more till we get another estate lot, I think" said Harry.

Harry moved furniture, greeted Dobby and Winky, who popped stock in to fill the spaces that had opened up from selling furniture.

The day wound to a close, Harry tired from his broken night. He picked up some desert, to make it up to Daphne for the night before and the cursed cider.

-==0==-

He apparated home, stasis charmed desert and went and looked at the storerooms again.

"Dobby!" Harry called.

Dobby appeared with a pop "Oh, Great Master Harry Potter Sir, Dobby is so pleased to see you" said Dobby, holding a tea-towel.

"Oh Dobby, are you making dinner?" asked Harry.

"The little ones need regular meals" said Dobby.

'Oh shit. Dobby and Winky have little elves and I never knew. Hermione would gut me with a rusty hook if she knew I didn't know.' thought Harry.

"Oh, Dobby, this isn't urgent, you go back to your family, I just wanted to go see the room of lost things, pull out some things to mend and sell" said Harry.

"Mistress will be needing dinner" said Dobby, shaking his head and popped away. Harry realised he didn't know where Dobby and Winky lived, which was weird, as they were house elves. Maybe at Hogwarts still. 'What had he been doing for the last year.' he thought, then remembered, Daphne … bed.. sex.

-==0==-

Daphne arrived home looking tired, but her hair was orderly, not a hair out of place. Harry's lip twitched. She still presented the same highly groomed facade to the world.

"Dinners here when you are" said Harry.

Daphne sank into a chair. "I need a good nights sleep" she said.

Harry dished up dinner.

Daphne ate thoughtfully. "Rabbit casserole, aren't we being fancy". Harry snorted "Accio'd it out of the gardens" he admitted.

When they were finished picking at the casserole, Harry served Daphne the Tiramisu.

"Tiramisu!" she said "That's far too much, I'll only eat a quarter of that".

Harry picked up the plate and split it off, stasis charming the main portion.

Daphne waited, looking slightly amused, till Harry replaced her plate. "There" said Harry.

"Why thank you Harry" said Daphne.

Harry cut himself a slice of Treacle Tart and sat back down.

Daphne eyed the Treacle Tart and shook her head.

Harry ate Treacle Tart. Harry reminisced at the taste of Hogwarts, 'ample food, of warm beds, soft sheets.'

Daphne pushed the tiramisu to one side. "You up for some more?" she said abruptly.

Harry dropped his spoon and ran upstairs. Izzy beat him there, as usual, so Daphne was lying on the bed, and crooked her finger at him.

Some time later.

"Good night Harry." she said softly.

-==0==-

Harry and Daphne were having breakfast, when an owl dropped off a letter for Daphne.

She gave the owl some bacon from Harry's plate and read the letter. Her face fell. "Oh no" she said.

Harry was instantly concerned "What is it dear?"

"My sister" said Daphne. "It's horrible"

"The, um, illness" asked Harry.

"Worse. She's dating Draco Malfoy." said Daphne.

"I could… accidentally anonymously kill him" said Harry.

"No! Bad boy" said Daphne. Harry snorted.

"Your parents are nice… but Christmas with Malfoy… eaugh!" groaned Harry.

"Yule."

"Yeah yule" said Harry.

"We can only hope she comes to her senses" said Daphne.

-==0==-

Months later.

Breakfast, an owl drops a letter for Daphne.

"They're getting engaged" said Daphne stonily.

"I love you dear, but I'm not… just not that little shit" said Harry.

"Well, apparently Malfoy feels the same way. He's admitted that you being family made him hesitant to ask" said Daphne, reading the letter.

"Well, I'll just have to talk to him… give him the digging charm talk" said Harry.

Daphne laughed. "Is that really a thing?"

"You father gave me one" said Harry.

Daphne snorted "If Father knew what you'd done" she said.

"Oh please, that would have been embarrassing, 'Oh you defeated the dark lord, here, take my daughter, right on the table, don't mind us'" said Harry.

"Father wouldn't have said that" said Daphne, standing up. "But you could." she said, raising one eyebrow.

"Well, I think, you might need this" said Harry, standing up and throwing off his shirt.

Daphne sat on the table and grabbed Harry eagerly.

"What if you're late for work" asked Harry, nuzzling Daphne's neck.

"My boss knows what you really did" said Daphne, pulling Harry's head to where she wanted it.

"Oh" murmured Harry, but his voice was muffled.

…

Harry stood over his wife, who was lying on the table contentedly, with her legs wrapped around his waist. "Well if you're not really worried about time..." said Harry. "One more for luck"

-==0==-

Draco Malfoy sat in his office. He looked the very model of a pure-blood wizard, heir to the Malfoy fortune… whenever father snuffed it… which was likely a hundred years away or more.

He looked at the paperwork. More routine forms for a junior undersecretary like him to check over. Still, it topped up his allowance to the point where he could propose to Astoria Greengrass. His heart beat faster. She was beautiful, pure-blooded, rich, and liked him. If only her sister wasn't married to that hopeless loser Potter.

As if by magic, the hopeless loser knocked on Draco's door and came in.

"Hello, Draco, nice to see you've found a job in the ministry" said Harry Potter, wearing a half-robe over tatty clothes. Nothing changes there.

"Lord Potter" said Draco, hating having to say it.

"Well, we've known each other forever, why don't you just call me Harry" said Harry Potter.

"And as we're going to be brothers-in-law" he continued, verbally twisting the knife.

"What is it…. Harry" said Draco.

"Well, I feel you need to be given some advice about our mutual father-in-law." said Harry

Draco resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"Now Cyrus will give you a speech, about knowing digging charms and having thirty acres" said Harry. "Don't take him seriously. He's not killed anyone. On the other hand, I like Astoria, and I have killed a number of wizards… starting with Quirrell, and ending with Tom Riddle Junior, though you know him by his nom-de-guerre of Lord Voldemort. It's embarrassing that he's a distant cousin, but anyway. I have killed a bunch of people, and if you EVER mess Astoria around or heaven help you,strike her I will kill you like I killed Peter Pettigrew. Without warning."

"I would never strike Astoria, I love her!" exclaimed Draco, rather disturbed by Potters admission that he'd killed multiple people.

"Good. Best of luck on the day… and what do you want as a gift. Budget's not really important" said Harry.

"You, you're supported by poor Daphne's job at the DMLE, you junk shop makes nearly no money" said Draco.

"Firstly, Daphne's not supporting me. The shop makes over a hundred galleons a week, week after week. It's a nice little earner, as they say. Most of my funds came from selling the Basilisk I killed in second year. Cyrus sold it for me, so he knows the sums involved. I'm not as rich as your father… but I'm certainly a millionaire, and I own a sixteen bedroom manor. So Daphne and I aren't struggling. Again, I ask; what do you and Astoria want for a gift? I'm feeling generous, I only have one sister-in-law, after all, cousin."

Draco winced. Harry Potter, was, as adopted by Lord Sirius Black, technically Harry's cousin.

"Basilisk?" asked Draco.

"What do you think was petrifying people in second year. Reflected killing gaze of a Basilisk" said Harry.

Draco paled "We could have all died" he said, like a little bitch.

"Ask your father how it got loose. But be warned, you might want to kill him afterwards" said Harry.

"My father will..."

"Hear about his… yes, Draco. I fully expect that. Go ask old Lucius how the basilisk got loose. Be prepared to act. He certainly didn't give a flying fuck about your safety."

-==0==-

_'Draco Malfoy, Lord Malfoy married Astoria Greengrass at a private service on the eighth of August, nineteen ninety nine. His mother, the Dowager Lady Malfoy was present, as were other family members.'_

Draco buttonholed Harry at the reception. "I'm sorry Lord Potter" said Draco.

"Apology accepted, Lord Malfoy" said Harry. "He didn't see it coming?"

"Mother" said Draco. "I told her first. She was… very exercised about it."

Harry nodded. It was better then Lucius deserved.

"Have you been taught Black family spells?" asked Draco.

"Some. I assume Narcissa used a fairly painful one" said Harry.

Draco nodded. "He deserved it" said Draco harshly.

"Your bride is looking at you with concern" said Harry.

"She probably thinks we're fighting" said Draco.

"Why would we fight? We both have delightful wives, who happen to be sisters. And I have your confession that your mother killed your father, and you're an accomplice. I don't expect to ever have

any trouble with you" said Harry.

Draco's face fell "You bastard" said Draco.

"Halfblood, not a bastard. But, thanks to me, you're richer than me, enjoy. Remember to vote on party lines. The light party lines" said Harry.

'That manipulative bastard' thought Draco, with a touch of admiration. Harry Potter might be the most Slytherin man he'd ever met.

Astoria fussed over Draco "Did Harry threaten you?" she asked.

"No, he was more subtle than that" said Draco. "Why wasn't he in Slytherin?"

-==0==-

Astoria Malfoy looked at her newborn son with pride. Her sister looker at her with a smile. "Well Astoria, you've made an heir. Well done. Now just one thing..."

"Yes Daphne?"

"Don't call him Scorpius" said Daphne. "How about Steven?"

-==0==-

September 1st 2017.

Draco and Astoria Malfoy hug Steven S(Scorpius) Malfoy, a small blond boy and his mum says "Now remember, I've given you extras sweets. Sweets help making friends." she said.

"Yes mum" said Steven.

Draco kissed his son's head. "Be noble" he murmured.

"It's Aunty Daphne!" exclaimed Steven, looking down the platform, where a dark haired man, a blonde woman and a couple of small dark haired boys were pushing luggage trolley.

Draco sighed and followed his family to see the in-laws.

Harry knelt by his younger son, who had brown-ish hair and blue eyes "Now Fred, we don't care where you go. Any house, your bother will give you a hard time, but that's because he's your big brother."

Charlus F. (Fleamont) Potter waited patiently for his baby brother's pep talk to end.

Beside his mother, his little sister, Iolanthe (call me Io) Sabrine Potter rolled her green eyes and flicked her blonde hair behind her ear. "If Fred can't suck it up, I'll go instead" said Iolanthe, who was blessed with her mothers kind heart and her fathers tact.

"Iolanthe, what did I say about that kind of talk" said Daphne.

"Not where Fred can hear" said Iolanthe. Daphne bent down and pinched Iolanthes cheek "You little monster." she said lovingly. "Here's your cousin Steven."

"Lord Potter" said Draco.

"Lord Malfoy" said Harry blithely.

Fred sighed "Steven, will you sit with me?"

"Yeah sure" said Steven. His cousin was okay, even if their dads cordially hated each other.

Draco put Steven's trunk on the train, Harry made Fred and Charlus put them on themselves one child per end of trunk.

In the distance, a group of red-robed Aurors surrounded a brown haired woman and a thin man, as they put a frizzy-haired small girl on the train.

"Oh there goes Hermione and Theo" said Astoria.

Daphne smiled "Harry, do you want to catch up with Hermione?" she asked.

"I think the Minister of Magic's got plenty to do before she talks to a shopkeeper while she's on the clock" said Harry.

Astoria snorted. Draco looked at his watch "I've got to get going" he said.

"Draco, you're independently wealthy. Make time for your child" said Harry.

"I'm an undersecretary in the Ministry" said Draco.

"You should quit." said Harry. "Spend more time on politics and with your wife."

Astoria preened.

Daphne shook her head. Men.

Iolanthe spoke up "Dad, can I sit with you in the workshop"

"As long as your schoolwork gets done" said Harry.

Daphne nodded "Make sure your father eats a proper lunch" she said.

Iolanthe nodded.

The small group watched the train fill up, and the boys waved from their compartment as the train left.

"Come on, time go home" said Harry to Iolanthe, as he hugged Daphne and gave her a kiss.

Draco looked horrified and Astoria wistful. "Draco... I feel my sisters policy on public affection should be emulated. Now" Draco hugged his wife and kissed her. She grabbed his head and snogged him back "Go get yourself fired." said Astoria, suggestively. "I'll be waiting."

"Why's Aunty 'Story being strange?" asked Iolanthe.

"Because Uncle Draco's about to quit his job and concentrate on his family and being a member of the wizengamot" said Harry.

"So he's going home to play with Aunty 'Story?"

"I rather expect so, yes" said Harry. Daphne smirked briefly.

Daphne kissed Iolanthe's head, winked at Harry and disappeared with a crack.

"I thought the platform was warded for apparation?" said Draco.

"DMLE" said Harry and took his nine-year-old daughter home to work on furniture.


End file.
